Welcome back to Rotten Ink, or, if your a first time reader, thanks for visiting my little geeky place on the web! When I was a teenager one of my closest friends was Jason Gilmore, who was a guy I worked with at Kroger. We were both baggers, and both of us were rowdy late teens who liked to listen to Danzig, watch pro-wrestling and play Nintendo 64 or Sony Playstation. I can remember many nights Jason and I, with bowls full of junk food and glasses filled with pop, would watch films all night or play video games. Most of the times the films we would watch were cheesy action films and b-grade horror flicks. On many of these binge nights of watching films I saw the likes of many Sonny Chiba Kung-Fu flicks and Jess Franco’s terrible shot on video masterpieces, and this is where we also discovered the world of Horror Parody films made by Seduction Cinema that not only packed in silly jokes but also lots of hot women who didn’t mind getting naked. This update is about two comic adaptations of Seduction Cinema films, and I will also share how I found out about the likes of Darrian Cain and Tina Krause. So sit back and relax and take a trip down the wild and sexy world of Seduction Cinema.
My brother Bryan used to always buy horror film magazines like Video Watchdog, Fangoria, Cult Movies, Psychotronic Video and Alternative Cinema, a magazine that showcased films made by Tempe, W.A.V.E, Troma and Camp Motion Pictures among many other independent studios. These magazines are where I learned about films like Psycho Sisters and first set my eyes on the lovely Tina Krause and so much more in between. The appeal of the magazine was that it covered films, directors and actors that the other horror magazines at the time would not touch and was a great tool when trying to find a VHS film to rent from the local rental store. I can remember always looking at films made by W.A.V.E. with such titles like Sleepover Massacre and Danger In Blue (these are some of the tame ones) that showcased women being murdered and chased by attackers and thinking “Wow, these are sleazy” as if you paid the right amount of money you could have the actresses act out your movie or fantasies like brushing their hair or putting on shoes. But this magazine will always have a special place in my heart; as I stated before it introduced me to Tina Krause as well as the wild parody world of Seduction Cinema! So here is to all of you who worked on Alternative Cinema Magazine for showcasing the films and actors that would have went unnoticed.
VHS and DVD collecting was always a popular hobby for me and my friends, and once more Jason Gilmore was one of those friends who loved to hit Suncoast in the Dayton Mall or Second Time Around on Brown Street and look for films that we wanted to check out on one of our movie marathon nights. The first Seduction Cinema films I ever saw were The Erotic Witch Project and Titanic 2000, two films we found on VHS at Suncoast. I can remember that while we watched the cheesy sex comedies, we would make comments on how hot the actresses were and laughed about just how bad the comedy was. Jason picked Erotic Witch because it starred Darian Caine, and I choose Titanic because of Tina Krause. Over the years I picked up a few more movies with Krause, and the first Seduction Cinema I ever picked up on DVD was Mistress Frankenstein a super cheesy flick that starred Darian as the monster. Another movie that stands out is My Vampire Lover, a film my then girlfriend Misty loved, and she became a fan on the pin up model Paige Richards who starred in it. When I became a movie reviewer Bloodline Video’s website many great companies were sending us DVD’s for reviews that included Paramount, Elite, Anchor Bay, SRS Cinema and of course Pop Cinema, the parent company of Seduction. Sometimes I miss the days of reviewing movies as it was always a fun time to sit down in front of the TV and fire up the DVD player and watch and write about the movie. Maybe one day I will return to doing so.
But thanks to being a reviewer I was loaded up with many of the “classic” Seduction Cinema Titles and many of the actresses became names I was familiar with so I figured that I would take this time and give you a rundown on some of my favorites, you know the ones who made some of these cheesy movies better just by showing up and showing out, so here is my top 4 actresses for Seduction Cinema.
AJ Khan
# 4 on my list is the one and only AJ Khan. AJ was born Anju Jena McIntyre in New Delhi, India on June 18th 1977 but when still an infant her family moved to Phoenix, Arizona. When she turned 18, she moved to New York were she started to work as a model, dancer and actress and made a name for herself being in music videos, and later she became a sex symbol by posing nude in such magazines as Penthouse and Portfolio. Around this time she also changed her name to AJ Khan and was a professional dominatrix. But in 2000, she began acting in Seduction Cinema soft core parody films in titles like “Erotic Witch Project 2: Book of Seduction”, “Daughters Of Darkness”, “The Erotic Mirror” and “That 70’s Girl” to name a few. Around this time she also was working with Rick Savage on S&M films and even directed a film called “Kinky Casting Couch”. As of 2014 she is still working in independent films and is even in an all female band called Buffalo Gals and has toured with said group. AJ is a beautiful woman who is an exotic beauty and is one heck of a good actress in these sleazy and cheesy movies.
So let’s take a look at my #3 actress in the world of Seduction Cinema, shall we?
Darian Caine
Darian was born in Amherst, Massachusetts on October 24, 1973 and was a cheerleader during her time in school. This helped her when she wanted to become a model when she went to live in New York. Darian modeled in many catalogs for many products from lingerie to shoes and was a stunning beauty. During this time she also started to take small extra roles in TV shows like Law & Order and did so until she became bored with the mainstream work she was doing. So she took a different route with her career that including being in adult magazines like Swank and Leg Show and as well became an actress for Seduction Cinema and for the most part was the original poster woman for the company and was on most of the company’s promotional items. Her first role was in a film called “Girl Explores Girl: The Alien Encounter,” and she went on to be in such films as “The Erotic Witch Project”, “Mistress Frankenstein”, “The Sexy Sixth Sense” and “The Erotic Ghost” to name a few. Besides Seduction Cinema films, Darian became a very popular actress for many independent horror films and still remains as lovely as ever. She also made two films for After Hours Cinema, a spin off from Seduction that are a little more adult in nature with one being called “Darian Caine My Pleasures.” Darian’s looks reminds me of a hot goth gal mixed with a metal chick, and that’s a-ok with me!
So we have seen AJ and Darian so far, and now it’s for my # 2 actress!
Misty Mundae
Misty Mundae was born Erin Brown in Illinois on October 16 1979 and began her acting career in films made by Factory 2000, a company made by William Hellfire. But after making these cheap films with such titles as “Vampire Strangler” and “The Bizarre Case Of The Electric Cord Strangler,” she began making films for Seduction Cinema and quickly became the company’s biggest and brightest star and became the go to girl for erotic movie parodies. She was in such “classics” as “Erotic Survivor”, “Mummy Raider”, “Roxanna”, “Lust In The Mummy’s Tomb”, “Sin Sisters”, “The Lord Of The G-Strings” and so many more! But also around this time, Misty was starring in Horror Films for E.I. Cinema (Pop), the parent company for Seduction in such films as “Screaming Dead”, “Lust For Dracula”, “Shock-O-Rama” and “Bite Me”. By 2005 she was cutting down her roles in Seduction Cinema titles and began taking roles in bigger budget films under the name Erin Brown as well as TV shows even getting a major role in The Masters Of Horror in a episode called “Sick Girl” and went on to be in such films as “The Rage,” “Holocaust Cannibal” and TV Shows like “Lingerie” and “C.S.I.”. Misty is still an active actress and has even directed a few films like “Voodoun Blues”, “Lustful Addiction” and “Confessions of a Natural Beauty”. What set Misty apart from many of the actresses in these type of films is that she had a girl next door look to her, and she was not made of plastic like so many are, plus on film she gave off a nice girl aura. I for one must say I am a Misty Mundae fan and enjoy her work in horror films as I feel she was fantastic in The Rage and Sick Girl. The first film I ever saw her in was Mummy Raider, a take on the video game series Tomb Raider.
Are you ready for my # 1 actress in Seduction Cinema history? And I am sure it will be no shock to anyone…
Tina Krause
Born on July 29, 1970 Tina Krause began her acting career in 1994 after being spotted at a Chiller Theatre Convention and before that she was a graphic designer and 3D illustrator. Her first film was a Horror film called “Sorority Slaughter” and from this moment on she became an instant hit for fans who enjoy low budget films and stunning scream queens. Many more film roles from WAVE would follow that included “Rana Queen Of The Amazon”, “Female Mercenaries On Zombie Island”, “Sorority Slaughter 2” and many others. In 1998, she made the leap into Seduction Cinema/E.I movies with her first being the original “Psycho Sisters” and many more would follow like “Vampire’s Seduction”, “Crimson Nights” and “Misty’s Secret” as well as many films for Factory 2000, the same company who brought Misty Mundae into the spotlight. Over the years Tina has starred in many films and even was in my good friend Chris Seaver’s Lord of the Rings parody film “Quest For The Egg Salad” where she played an elf named Nienna. Tina is still acting and has many upcoming films this year like “Scars Of A Predator” and “Hunters”, not to mention she also models and is as stunning as ever. While she was not rammed down your throat like many of the other Seduction actresses, I can safely say that Tina remains my favorite and her beauty is unmatched by all of the Seduction girls past and present. The first time I saw Tina was in a copy of Alternative Cinema magazine and the first full movie of hers was Titanic 2000.
Seduction Cinema has slowed down on making sexy movie parody films as of late, and they don’t seem to have an actress that is the face of the company like they did with Darian and Misty and now focus a lot on independent horror films and classic smut reels. To be honest, I really dig that they have started to put out more horror flicks like “Phantom of The Grindhouse”, “Porkchop” and “Babysitter Massacre”. But now I think it’s time to take a look at the comics based on Seduction Cinema films, and I want to thank Amazon for having them in stock. I want to remind you that I grade these on a standard 1-4 star rating and base it on entertainment value, quality of the story, the art and how true it stays to the source martial. So are you ready to get your Seduction on…wait that sounds gross let’s just start with the comic reviews.
Playmate Of The Apes # 1 **1/2
Released in 2012 Cover Price $9.99 Seduction Cinema Comics #1 of 1
Deep in space Commander Gaylor is asleep as her two shipmates Lt. Fornication and Lt. Pushkintucushkin decide to make out with each other and press the do no push button causing their ship to crash on a planet filled with monkeys who act like humans! The girls are taken prisoner and are forced to dance at a strip club to see if they have “soul” and are under the watch of an ape woman named Dr. Cornholeus and a fuzzy gorilla named Dr. Kweera who want to prove to the ape in charge, General Lade, that the new human women from space can dance. Lade is having none of it and is upset at the idea that a human woman has the soul to dance, and this causes them to send away Lt. Fornication and Lt. Pushkintucushkin to an unknown location making their fate a mystery. Commander Gaylor is freed from her cell along with a wild woman named Uvula, and with the two Ape doctors, they go on the run. Lade and his men find out and go on the hunt for the missing human women, but Gaylor only wants to get to her ship so she can go home. On the journey they meets a barbarian queen who takes the wanted group to her village. But during a rap and dance party at the human village Lade and his men find them and are about to kill them all until a God like figure called The Missing Link, an ape with a human head, tells them that ape and man are the same and the hatred goes out the window as they all have a big party! In the end with some chewing gum they fix Gaylor’s ship and she is off only to land on a planet where everyone is a chicken!
This comic feels like a more adult version of a Cracked Magazine parody of Planet Of The Apes that could have been in their classic magazine. And I should note it has plenty of big oversized naked comic boobs to make it not suitable for younger comic readers. The plot is paper thin and is about three lesbian astronauts crashing on a planet run by apes. They are forced to dance and are hunted down when some escape. None of the characters are super fleshed out so I will try my best to give you all a little something about the leads of this comic adaptation. Commander Gaylor is a strong willed woman who knows what she wants in life and also has the ability to dance making her stand out among the other females of the planet. Lt. Fornication and Lt. Pushkintucushkin are dimwit goofs who are throwaway characters in this comic and only act as the two who are responsible for the crash and are quickly written out of the comic story. Dr. Cornholeus is a female ape who believes in human woman and think that they do have soul and can dance. Dr. Kweera is a fuzzy ape who is around for one liners and filler. Uvula is a mindless beautiful savage woman who adds nothing but a make out scene to the comic, and the same can be said for the barbarian queen. General Lade is an ape who hates human women and thinks they are all soulless beasts who are good for nothing. And last is the strange Missing Link who has a human head and a body of a gorilla who in a few words makes all the hate between the apes and humans go away, making you wonder what they hell took him so long to do so! The comic is filled with all types of cameos from the likes of C3PO from Star Wars to Hanna Barbara’s Magilla Gorilla truly giving it that Cracked or Mad magazine feel and quality with this just pushing more of adult humor. The art is done by Noel Anderson and is really good and has a cartoon look to it, think Archie Comics meets Star Comics and you have the style. The downside is that the characters look NOTHING like the actresses that play them in the film. While not perfect, it still is a fun silly read that holds true to the nature of a Seduction Cinema movie.
Well from apes now to a spider-like superheroine (and I am not talking about Marvel’s Spider-Woman), we are talking about Spider-Babe! So let’s get to her adventure, shall we?
Spider Babe # 1 **1/2
Released in 2012 Cover Price $9.99 Seduction Cinema Comics #1 of 1
Patricia Porker is a nerd high school student who has a rich best friend named Lisa and lives with her Aunt Maybe and Uncle Flem. While at school she gets bitten by a radioactive spider that turns her into a superhero who is turned on by other woman and has super strength. Patricia meets Lisa and her sister Lucinda for a short time and gets invited by her friend’s sister to come visit her work, and that night to get some money Patricia has a pro wrestling match as a masked fighter called Spider Babe against the undefeated woman’s champ Queen Bee and spanks her in the ring! After the match, a robber makes a get away and shoots and kills her Uncle Flem so as Spider Babe she takes him down, and from this moment on she becomes a super hero! Meanwhile Lucinda tests an experiment on herself and becomes a pissed off baddie named Femtilian who recruits a gang of clowns to take over the town. Patricia’s life is going good as she has moved in with her friend Lisa and even had saved the boy she likes, Mike, from a pack of red necks! But in the end as Spider Babe she comes face to face with Femtilian, and the two battle in the streets that leads them on top of a building where they learn each others’ true identities. When Femtilian tries to trick Spider Babe, she accidentally knocks her from the building killing her and turning Lisa into a hater of Spider Babe in the end.
This comic adaptation is a cross between the film its based on, Spider-Man – the film it’s a parody of and once more Cracked Magazine. The plot is a nerd girl gets bitten by radioactive spider and turns into a hot and bothered super hero who takes on a super villain that turns out to be her best friend’s sister. Or I could safely also say that the comic is all about Patricia Porker’s butt as that seems to be the focus on many panels as well as many jokes. Patricia Porker or Spider-Babe is a young woman who is smart, clumsy, in love and loves her best friend Lisa as well as Mark but can’t get her mind off Lucinda, who seems to be her dream lover. Lucinda or Femtilian is a master mind criminal who wants to take over the city with the help of her clown gang and will do whatever she can to gain that power. Too bad she gets beat up super quickly by Spider Babe and is knocked off a building to her death. The rest of the characters are all throwaways who do what little they can to help move yet another paper thin plot along. The issue is packed with cheesy one liners, some fist to fist action and of course girls making out and captures the goofy nature of the film it’s based on making it a fun read. Like Playmate Of The Apes, this comic has some great cameos like comic strip character Dagwood and even Sylvester P. Smythe from Cracked Magazine! The art is once more well done by Noel Anderson and still doesn’t look like the actresses who played the parts but I found myself not caring as I liked the Archie cartoon look. Not much more can be said about this comic besides if you like your super hero comic laced with sleaze, then this is something I am sure you would like.
So as you can see, these comics are cheesy fun filled with all the charm and nudity of the films and then some as they add in nice over the top cameos from popular characters from movies, TV and magazines. So as of 2015 and this update, I have yet to hear about any other plans for new comics to be made in this series and that’s a shame as I feel that many of their Seduction titles and LOTS of their horror titles would make good comics as I would love to see comics based on Splatter Farm, Babysitter Massacre, and Video Violence. But time will only tale if more issues are in the fates. Our next update will be coming from Monster Bash Convention again, and we will be taking a look at Fantaco’s adaptation of Night Of The Living Dead. So make sure to come back and visit for that one! So until next time, read a comic or three, watch a movie or two and support your local horror host.
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