The Marvel Lifeform Sickness..Has No Cure!

It’s a new update here on Rotten Ink.  It’s also wintertime and the update before my big Christmas Eve update, but also during this time of the year besides snow, toys and family comes that wonderful season of colds, flu and sickness! So this quick update will be about sickness and a virus that spread throughout Marvel Comics called Lifeform and had to be stopped by the likes of Hulk, Daredevil, Punisher and Silver Surfer before it was spread around the world. So let’s get some medicine, chicken noodle soup and a warm blanket and take a trip down Sick Blvd and try to avoid the germs and illness along the way.

Chicken Noodle Soup

While many of you might think that I am immortal like Hercules, I am here to break your heart because I am as mortal as you all.  Okay, well I am sure none of you thought this, but I felt like this was a good way to lead up to one of the worst times I was sick. In about 2008 or so I was working at a place called Hotel Liquidations.  I spent time unloading furniture trucks as well as loading pieces into customers’ cars, and while working there full time, I started to get a sore throat.  Instead of nursing it, I continued to work out in the cold weather and inhaling dust from the warehouse, and my throat got worse. Finally one day at work my throat hurt so bad that I could not talk or open my mouth without pain, and I bit the bullet and finally went to the doctor’s with the urging of my coworkers.  Before I went, I was not thinking and took a cough drop that was cherry flavored, and for those who don’t know, I am allergic to fake cherry flavoring as well as real cherries and this made me break out in massive hives.  So I had to bundle up in long sleeves with a hoodie to cover my face and looked as if I had the plague.  Thanks to my close friend and roommate at the time Patrick Neeley, I got to the doctors where I was diagnosed with having a terrible case of strep throat, one of the worse he had seen up to that point! So after getting my medications I was told that I was highly contagious and that I needed to be quarantined in my room so that I did not spread it to Patrick, my then girlfriend Jennifer and the rest of the world. For a little under two weeks, I sat in my room watching films like the original War of The Worlds, The Blob, IT! Terror From Beyond Space and many other sci-fi films. Patrick was nice enough to leave me pitchers of water by my door as well as cook me chicken and beef broth for that was all I could “eat” as I could not open my mouth much at all. Jennifer would come and visit for a short time but had to wear a mask, and she was nice enough to bring me comics to read as well as gave support and love. The pain in my throat was terrible and the swelling in my glands was out of control.  The medication I was taking was what would be called the size of a horse pill and was not pleasant to take. The days went by and slowly the medications started to help along with the sleep and drinking tons of water, and finally I was better and able to go back to work…and my first day back I got Scarlet Fever from the Strep Throat.  Yep, another pain in the ass sickness that lead to more missed days of work. While I really hate being sick I must say that the only plus side to having my throat swollen that badly was I got to re-watch many great classic science fiction films and I also saw how much my friends, family, co-workers and girlfriend really cared about me as they all went above and beyond to make sure that I was okay and had what I needed to get better. So with that, here is to good health to us all, and let’s say no to harmful germs this winter!

Just Say No To Winter Germs

I want to stroll away from sickness for a moment and take a look at a horror host that could have been a household name in Cedar Rapids, Iowa on KCRG hosting the show Saturday Nightmare.  Sadly he didn’t win the casting call as the host gig went to Dr. Morbius who hosted spooky movies from 1987-1988, but he host I am talking about would have been called Slime and was played by Eric Fournier. In August of 1987, KCRG did a call to arms for horror hosts to take the hosting gig for their new late night horror show.  42 hosts applied for the job, and only one got the honor. After some digging and looking around in many haunted houses and cemeteries, I am proud to say I have found Slime who was evil enough to answer 5 Questions for you my readers, making this the official 5 Questions With Slime!

Horror Host Slime

Me: Welcome to Rotten Ink Slime! My first question is how did you hear about the casting call to host Saturday Nightmare on channel 9?

Slime: Hello Matt, and thanks for taking the time to dig me up after all these years — although it’s spring now, and I would have come out of hibernation soon. Oddly enough, I was lying dormant for several decades when a construction crew in the area had inadvertently stumbled upon me. As it happened, it was just down the street from where the auditions had been held. Actually, my girlfriend was hounding me to get a job, so I saw that the local studio was looking for a host. I thought my looks were good enough to keep her interested, but apparently I was mistaken.

Me: Growing up did you have a favorite Horror Host that you use to watch? 

Slime: Frankly, I was hatched about 200 years ago, so by the time I’d discovered “The Acri Creature Feature” in the early 70’s, I was already quite mature. Like all kids and lizards back then, I was enthralled that anyone was so interested in the same kind of things I was, much less, would dedicate a show to it. Back in those days, there were only a handful of channels available, and none of them contained the kind of programming that would show movies that featured creatures like me. Like with so many other things, cable TV ruined that too. I remember making “Creep of the Week” several times through the 1970’s, and I didn’t even have to do any drawings. I just sent in some pics taken of me by some local kids, and I won the coveted “Creep” certificate about 4 times. I didn’t realize until later that it was actually sort of an insult. I went to take my revenge on 3 of the show’s goons, Vincent Hedges (the vampire), Emmett (the Hunchback guy), and Beauregard (the Werewolf), but the gang turned out to be so friendly, that I was content to just get their autographs.

Me: Tell us how you came up with the Host Character Slime, and a little about the character’s backstory?

Slime: Truth be told, the whole thing was pretty impromptu. I had no time to prepare any bits, and as you can see in the video, I was still busy defoliating when I got the call to be on camera. The only backstory I suppose, was that I’d put so much emphasis on appearance, that I’d completely ignored what I might actually have done as the show’s host. Besides just sitting there looking pretty, I guess nothing but spout endless gobs of fun facts about the horror cinema I’d grown up loving so much. All I could do by way of any preparation was to regurgitate an old Karloff routine I’d committed to memory decades earlier.

Me: During the Audition did you see another Horror Host hopeful and think that they could take the hosting gig? 

Slime: I was running extremely late for the auditions. Like any other lizard, I was sunning myself on a rock for some energy reserves. By the time I got to the studio, most of the other audition people had fled — or at least they did when I showed up. Since I arrived so late, and was busy most of my time at the studio in a bathroom making myself look pretty, I missed most of the other would be hosts. I’d done some stand up stuff with Bruce Gantenbein, so when I’d heard that he’d auditioned earlier that day, I wasn’t surprised when he got the gig as the show’s permanent host, “Dr. Morbius.” I was saddened to hear that he has since passed away.

Me: In closing, since hosting Saturday Nightmare was not in the cards what did you go onto do in the world of entertainment?

Slime: Well, I’m happy to report that the surgery was a success, and I’ve made the transition from reptile to human being, more or less. As far as entertainment goes, I’ve done most of my work behind the camera as a videographer and documentarian. On occasion, I’ll turn up at one of the local comedy clubs and do whatever’s necessary to get some laughs. My love for the classic horror flicks hasn’t diminished, and I dabble in recreating some of them as digitally designed characters. Every now and then, I’ll still get the hankering to put on the old latex in a vain attempt to re-capture my former good looks. You see…I miss the scales!

Me: Thanks so much for your time and long live Slime! 

It was very cool to chat with Slime, and I for one really would love to see him become a full fledged host and make a show with a title like “Slime Time” or “Slimy Midnight Theater” and be shown on YouTube, DATV and The Kreepy Kastle! But here is to not only Slime, but the other 40 horror host hopefuls as well as Dr. Morbius who all entertained Iowa on that premiere episode of Saturday Nightmare. Also if you have any episodes of Saturday Nightmare hosted by Dr. Morbius, please contact me as I would love to see them and also do a Horror Host Icon for Morbius. So let’s get back to the sickness that’s about to infect the Marvel Comic Universe.

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It’s time to climb into our HAZMAT suits and take a look at the Progamma Virus that can change normal humans into lumpy flesh eating masses of goo and just hope that along our journey none of us come in contact with it. But before we enter the danger zone, I want to thank Bell, Book And Comic and Lone Star Comics for having these issues in stock, and as always I must remind you that I grade these issues on a star scale of 1 to 4 and am looking for how well the comic stays to the source material, its entertainment value and its art and story. So as the rock band Disturbed says, let’s get down with the sickness!

Punisher Annual 3

Punisher: Annual  # 3  ***
Released in 1990   Cover Price $2.00   Marvel Comics #3 of 7

George is a masked man who is breaking into a lab to steal a bio-weapon that causes those affected to have hallucinations, become very violent and mutate, and worse for all of us, it spreads like a common cold! During the burglary George and a security guard get into a fight, and as the guard is killed, some of the bio weapon makes contact with George’s skin causing him to fall ill. The Punisher shows up at the lab as he had news that A.I.M. was trying to break in and makes contact with George who now looks like a zombie and is out for blood! The Punisher fends off George and finds out from an A.I.M worker that political hopeful Jethro Prufrock is the man who’s responsible for hiring them to steal the virus and that he also is stock pilling weapons for a war he thinks is coming. The Punisher escapes the lab with a crazed George following and makes it to the Prufrock residence where he overhears that George is Jethro’s son as he argues with his daughter over needing the virus and how important it is for his cause. The Punisher has heard enough, comes out of hiding, and is ready for the bust when George shows up in a wild rage looking even worse from the virus and kills his father and attacks his sister and The Punisher! Normal gun fire is only slowing George down so The Punisher finds a bazooka and blasts George away “killing” him and stopping the virus.  In the end, The Punisher learns that the Prufrock family was very much dysfunctional and that he saved the day from a highly contagious virus being spread around New York.

The origin of Lifeform explodes to life in this Punisher Annual, and this is just the start of the sickness that is sure to spread through the Marvel Universe. The plot is very simple and has a son trying to hard to impress his well to do father who takes a job robbing a place to impress him.  Things go wrong, the son is infected with a incurable virus and goes on a rampage that ends at his own house with the murder of his father. Throw in a superhero like The Punisher and the sick man’s sister, and you have the first segment in this mini series. The Punisher goes in thinking he is stopping a plot by A.I.M who is selling the bio-weapon to a presidential candidate but turns out having to fight a raged filled infectious killer who seems to be un-killable! The Punisher is cool and collected in fighting the killer even when blowing him up with a rocket launcher. George, the man who becomes the Lifeform, is by all accounts a failure who wants to impress his father but deep down hates his guts for the years of disappointment his father has had in him. When he becomes the killer, he becomes crazy and has the urge to kill those who are around him and no gun can stop him. His appearance is grotesque as his skin has turned bubbly and his features take on the appearance of melted cheese or a wet paper bag with boils all over it. I like the idea of something so simple like a robbery has sparked something that could spell doom for many people all over greed and fear. The comic has two other features that includes a look at The Punisher’s arsenal and a short adventure featuring Microchip, who is The Punishers close friend and business partner. The main story’s art is pretty well done and is done by Neil Hansen who has that very 90’s Marvel style. So far this is a nice start up to a pretty cool story that links some of Marvel’s biggest misfits of superheroing! Below is some of the artwork by Neil that shows what George looks like in this annual.  I should also note that for some reason George in this picture reminds me of the film Nightbreed and the characters called The Berserkers.

Art 1

I can’t wait to see how Daredevil will deal with this terror and how George infected with Lifeform will come back from being blown up so let’s not wait any longer.

Daredevil Annual 6

Daredevil: Annual  # 6  ***
Released in 1990     Cover Price $2.00     Marvel Comics    # 6 of 10

Daily Bugle writer Ben Urich has gotten word about the theft at the lab and that some sort of creature was on the loose battling The Punisher, but while the accounts say the monster is dead, sightings have been reported and Ben wants to know what it was and why. Along the dock Lifeform George appears and is unharmed after being blown up, but his appearance has gotten more grotesque.  It seems as if the virus now has a new mission, to consume human flesh! So George hits the streets of Hell’s Kitchen and kills and eats anyone who gets in his way, but Daredevil gets wind of this and saves street crooks The Wildboys from being Lifeform’s lunch.  In the battle the monster looses an arm and disappears into the darkness. Crooked cops Hobbes and Robbins show up just in time, and not thinking Robbins touches the arm and becomes infected. Ben Urich gets a visit from a man named Lamar Kwait who claims he can make a cure for George and turn him back to normal if he could get a sample of Lifeform’s blood.  All things come to a head when Daredevil along with Hobbs, Urich and Lamar find Lifeform George and during the meeting Lamar’s spine is broken by Lifeform who is being shot by tranquilizers and turns into a pile of ooze ending his terror once more….for now!

This second part showcases Hell’s Kitchen in New York and has Lifeform going on the prowl to find human flesh to eat.  Reporter Ben Urich along with a doctor who’s looking for a cure, are on its trail but it’s really up to Daredevil to stop the sickness from spreading and save the lives of those who are on Lifeforms lunch menu. The issue has three really good side stories that has Lifeform trying to kill The Fat Boys, Robbins on his death bed and dying from being infected and also having a run in with Typhoid Mary in an ally. Poor George is looking very rough now and is more of a white glob of sickness and jelloed skin, and worse he seems to be having a battle in his own mind as the George side just wants to be cured and the Lifeform side wants to kill and spread the sickness. Daredevil is as noble as ever and wants to keep Hell’s Kitchen safe from crime and monsters. Darvedevil takes the opposite route of The Punisher and uses his fists to fight the monster and not guns. The crooked cops Hobbes and Robbins add some drama to the situation, and the nice extra story that shows Robbins dying from the virus also was a nice touch and shows you should never touch things when you’re not sure what they are. Ben Urich and Lamar Kwait also add to the story and the fury of Lamar wanting to inject Lifeform with the cure tranquilizers shows how focused he is, as well adds the question why does he want to do this so badly. Plus the issue makes good use of many other DD characters as Typhoid Mary, The Fat Boys and The Wildboys all have cameos and help add to the issue and storyline, and each are nice to see. The main story art is done by Cam Kennedy and is top notch early 90’s work.  I really dig the way he drew Daredevil and Lifeform as both are very well done.  Check out his Lifeform below.

Art 2

With Lifeform being a cannibal I really can’t wait to read this next issue as he takes on one of my all time favorite superheroes The Incredible Hulk!

Incredible Hulk Annual 16

Incredible Hulk: Annual  # 16  ***
Released in 1990    Cover Price $2.00    Marvel Comic    #16 of 23

The Incredible Hulk is roaming the desert and is in a bad mood over loosing his job, women and friends in Vegas and goes nuts when he sees an army convoy driving by. Hulk does what he does best and that’s smash as he thinks they are after him, but he was wrong and after being embarrassed by the commanding officer, he leaps into the middle of nowhere and finds on old theater that used to house plays that’s now abandon and he decides to hang out for awhile. Ben Urich goes and visits Lamar in the hospital and finds out that he was not really trying to help George as he really needed him to find a cure for the virus that he is infected with as well.  You see, he was an A.I.M agent who was bitten by a test monkey that was infected with it and now he is dying. Mercy, who is a female with strange powers who does cruel things and acts as if they are acts of mercy, kills an old bum who is down on his luck and quickly finds out that just because people say they wish they were dead, it doesn’t mean they mean it thanks to an old woman who witnessed the act. Lifeform George is still alive and pulls himself back together and is looking for human flesh and sweet death.  When Mercy hears his plea for death, she decides that what she is going to do is grant him the gift of friendship and takes him to The Hulk who is still hiding out in the theater. This act of “kindness” from Mercy just upsets The Hulk who wanted to be left alone but now is being bothered by these two.  This causes Mercy to force The Hulk to come face to face with Bruce Banner as she makes him appear, and this makes Hulk even more mad and Lifeform hungry! The two monsters clash in a epic fight that leaves the theater on fire, Bruce Banner killed and Mercy sending Lifeform back to the docks and turning him human for short time in New York and Hulk coming to peace with no matter how much he hates Banner he needs him, as he finds out that Banner was really just Mercy in disguise. We also find out that Lamar is in the hospital with a hurt spine as well as infected with the virus as he was an A.I.M. clean up member and by accident came in contact with the virus that is killing him that is why he wanted to try and find a cure so bad. In the end the human George turns back into Lifeform and eats the dying Lamar to end his pain and suffering.

This issue has two monsters fighting it out on a stage in an old theater, which adds great atmosphere to this twisted tale of an infected man. The plot for this annual has The Hulk making a mistake and attacking the military, and after doing so, he goes to lay low in an old abandoned theater.  Lifeform once more rises from the muck and meets Mercy who takes him to the Hulk as she thinks the two monsters can be friends, and this, of course, is a bad idea as they fight and burn the place down. To say sorry, she turns George back to human for a short time and when turning back to Lifeform he kills Lamar who is infected and has a damaged spine in what’s looked at as a mercy killing. Geroge/Lifeform is really split now as the human side wants to die and the virus side wants to live and spread sickness and eat human skin! The Hulk in this Annual is the grey mean-spirited one who comes out during the fullmoon, and his anger is out of control, as he once more just wants to be left alone but trouble seems to follow him. He also takes the Daredevil approach in fighting Lifeform and uses fists to try and stop this infected puss bag. Plus watching Hulk dress as a hunchback and delivering lines from the film Young Frankenstein is pretty amazing. Mercy is an odd bad guy as she thinks she is helping people who are depressed by killing them, but when she is told people say things they don’t mean like “I want to die” she decides to try and help Lifeform who’s George side is begging to be killed.  Plus its cool to see Hulk get annoyed just by the sight of her. In the story Mercy also takes the form of Bruce Banner to try and talk The Hulk into becoming Lifeform’s friend and its cool to see the two interact.  It’s also cool to see Lifeform look at the fake Bruce as dinner! This issue is filled with a monster vs. monster fight and brings a coolness factor out of this annual, as does the fact it’s being told by George who has been cured for a short time and is telling this story to Lamar before he eats him! The art of the issue is done by Angel Medina and is what I expected for Grey Hulk storyline and issue.  Check below for how Lifeform looks in this annual, which I must also note is my favorite look for him thus far in the mini series.

Art 3

From the brute force of The Hulk to the cosmic energy of The Silver Surfer is how we are going to end the sad saga of George Prufrock, a man who is becoming a walking virus Lifeform.

Silver Surfer Annual 3

Silver Surfer: Annual  # 3  ***
Released in 1990    Cover Price $2.00    Marvel Comic    #3 of 9

The Silver Surfer returns to Earth from space to share news with Captain America that Thanos has been killed by his hands during their last battle. While at the hospital Lifeform goes on a rampage eating doctors, nurses and patients and keeps growing into a large blob of flesh and teeth that now wants to eat anyone it sees! Nick Fury of S.H.E.I.L.D. contacts Reed Richards of the Fantastic Four to check up on the hospital, and while doing so, Reed runs into Silver Surfer who agrees to help him on the massacre that they stumble onto. It’s chaos and death as Lifeform has made a path for the ocean and is now eating fish.  Reed and the Silver Surfer follow, and Lifeform springs from the water and knocks Reed senseless, then sets his sights on killing and eating the people watching from the docks. But Silver Surfer has seen enough and allows Lifeform to eat him and by doing so he uses his cosmic power to make Lifeform float into space and onto a planet this is void of life. The Silver Surfer bursts out of Lifeform and as he does so, the spirit of George once more comes through and he begs Surfer to kill him.  This is not what the Silver Surfer does, so he leaves Lifeform alone on a planet in space.

It takes cosmic power to put a stop the rampage of Lifeform who in this short mini series had killed many of people by infecting them as well as eating them! This issue’s plot has George losing all control and the virus Lifeform taking over causing him to grow into a grotesque blob creature who kills humans and sea life before being stopped by The Silver Surfer who takes him to space and leaves him on a planet that has no life, thus making the Earth safe and poor George stuck with his sickness and not finding the death he so greatly wants. Silver Surfer is a very powerful and noble hero who saves Earth even though he hates visiting here due to bad memories.  He understands that Lifeform is a major threat and removes him from Earth so he can no longer spread his sickness. The pure power and heart of Silver Surfer has always made him a very interesting character in the Marvel Universe. Lifeform in this issue is a pure killing machine who seems to not be able to get his fill of flesh, blood and bone as all he wants to do is eat and eat like me at a cookout serving steak. Lifeform, while very much evil, is also a very sad character as he almost has a Larry Talbot Wolfman appeal to him as his human side hates what the monster side does and would love nothing more than to find peace in death. It was nice to see Captain America, Nick Fury and Reed Richards in cameos, and one thing that made me smile is how useless Reed was in the battle as one hit knocks Mr. Fantastic out of the fight game worse than Marvis Frazier being knocked out my Mike Tyson in 30 seconds in the first round. While this was a great issue with lots of mayhem and action I still can’t help but feel a little cheated with the way Lifeform was beat.  While it’s cool that it has to stay in cold space on a planet that is lonely and bare for the rest of it’s life, I would have much rather seen Lifeform destroyed or kept in a cell and used again at a later date to fight the likes of Iron Man, Spider-Man, Man-Thing and Captain America in another annual mini series. The art for this one was done by Ron Lim and just like the others is top notch 90’s stuff.  Check out the final look for Lifeform George below and see what the fate of others could have been if it wasn’t stopped.

Art 4

So all along the virus of Lifeform could have been stopped early if only The Punisher would have shot him into space, think about all the lives that could have been saved if instead of a bazooka he used a rocket ship to stop George. But all kidding aside, I found myself really enjoying this weird little storyline that spanned many characters 1990 Annuals. I love how through out the series George grew more and more grotesque and with each transformation, his human side kept dying little by little and the virus ate away at his brain and soul. One thing that made me chuckle was how come The Punisher and Daredevil never contacted the virus as they both had run ins with him and both are mortal with super athletic abilities, but both had contact with a man who was a carrier for a very contiguous disease. I mean I understand how Hulk and Silver Surfer didn’t become infected, but DD and The Punisher by all accounts should have. It would have been nice to also seen this storyline be in the 1990 Annuals for Captain America and Spider-Man as both were in New York at the time of this outbreak and Cap even had a cameo in Silver Surfer showing that he was around. Marvel, to my knowledge, never did use Lifeform again and have left him in space since 1990, makes me wonder why they never brought him back because this time around he also could have been a carrier for a space born virus and finds away back to Earth via a rocket ship and now sets his sights on infecting mankind with his sickness and pain! It could have been a cool idea, but with Marvel in the comic world now not focusing on the past and “updating” things, I am sure Lifeform really is dead in space. Our next update will be Rotten Ink’s big Christmas Eve update, and once more we will be visiting the DC Comic Theater as we take a look at the film adaptations of Superman.  So make sure to comeback for that one! Until then, have a safe holiday, read a comic or three and as always support your local horror host.

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Hercules and The Three Stooges Save Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving! It’s once again that time of the year for family, football and good food, and as you longtime readers know, its time for my Turkey Day Hercules update.  This year we will be looking at when Hercules met the princes of slapstick comedy, The Three Stooges. But before we get silly with this update I want to get serious for a moment and say that I am thankful for my family, friends and readers all of whom make my life way more fun! Plus, I want to dedicate this update to family and friends I have sadly lost over the years as each of them have helped make me the person I am today and they are all missed. I should also state that once more this year I am over at my parents house this Thanksgiving and waiting to eat some amazing home cooked food and enjoy good conversations with my family. So here is hoping that the belly full of laughs from this update doesn’t counteract your belly filled with food as we take a trip down memory lane with The Three Stooges.

Three Stooges and Turkey

It’s crazy to think that I have been doing this blog for several years now, and I have yet to talk about The Three Stooges, comedians I grew up watching alongside my Dad and brother and whose classic movies and shorts still entertain me to this day. The Stooges started out in 1925 as Ted Healy and His Stooges that consisted of Ted, Moe, Larry and Shemp, and the group toured around entertaining the masses and even made a feature film called “Soup To Nuts”. Shemp left the group in 1932 and was replaced by Curly, and a brief time later The Stooges broke away from Ted Healy in 1934 after making several short films and became The Three Stooges! Ted Healy died in 1937 from unknown and mysterious causes. One thing that should be noted is that Moe, Curly and Shemp were all brothers and all had their own wacky style of slapstick style humor. As The Three Stooges much work came their way in the form of short and feature length movies, and the threesome became one of America’s top comedic acts with Curly becoming the fan favorite for his silly faces and childlike behavior. But while things were good for the Stooges, bad luck caught up to them in 1946 when Curly suffered a massive stroke that left him unable to work, and up to the stroke Curly’s health was on a decline. Time passed, and The Stooges retired for some time hoping that Curly would get better, but the signs of him coming back were growing slim so they asked Shemp to rejoin.  He did for some time, and even was a part of The Stooges’ first ever TV appearance on “Texaco Star Theater” in 1948. But once more some bad news was coming The Stooges’ way in 1952 as Curly passed away at the age of 48 from a cerebral hemorrhage caused by more strokes.  They also lost some of their supporting cast when Columbia, the studio they were signed to, decided to downsize its short film department and the short films of the Stooges were being done cheaper and faster. Then in 1955, Shemp passed away from a heart attack on his way home from a boxing match; he was 60 years old. I should also note that in many of The Three Stooges films, a stand in was used for Shemp in shots who would wear a wig; this term was called Shemping and is still used to this day. In 1956 The Stooges hired Joe Besser as the new member who was a character who was goofy and would also fight back against Moe who was the dominate Stooge.  During this time The Three Stooges lost steam, and Besser was considered the weakest link in the trio.  After only three years with them his time came to an end, and in 1959 it appeared The Three Stooges had come to an end or did they?! The old Three Stooges short films were now being aired on TV and aimed toward kids.  This gave Moe and Larry an idea to try and launch a quick comeback with new Stooge named Curly Joe, and the trio launched into making movies again, this time aimed at the young and young at heart in the 1960’s.  They became one of the highest paid acts in Hollywood and even got turned into an animated cartoon series in 1965 called “The New 3 Stooges” and even tried their hands at becoming a weekly TV show that would have been called “Three Stooges Scrapbook”. In 1969, they were given another chance at becoming weekly TV stars with a show that would have been called “Kook’s Tour” that would follow the Stooges as they traveled the world, but this was not to be as Larry suffered a heart attack ending his run with the trio as well as ending The Three Stooges.  Even a dark comedy film written by Moe’s grandson called “Make Love, Not War” or “Make Mine Manila” and was about Moe, Curly Joe and Emil Sitka (a regular in Stooge movies) being POWs of World War II trying to escape never could get a green light from a studio. In 1974 Larry at the age of 72 suffered a stroke that put him into a coma, and sadly a short time later he passed away. Moe tried so hard not to let The Three Stooges end even after the death of his long time comedy partner and tried to get many movies off the ground but never could.  His last idea was a movie called “Blazing Stewardesses” but before it began Moe fell ill with lung cancer and had to retire from acting and passed away in 1975. Curly Joe still performed for years with a group he called The New Three Stooges that consisted of Mousie Garner and Frank Mitchell that went on till 1979. Joe Besser passed away in 1988 at the age of 80 from heart failure; Curly Joe passed away in1993 at the age of 83 from pneumonia, and Emil Sitka who was the only Stooge replacement never to be in a movie or show as a Stooge passed away in 1998 from a stroke at the age of 83. The Three Stooges are icons in the world of comedy, and now that I gave you a brief history on who they were, next I will share some memories of watching them!

The Stooges 1The Stooges 2The Stooges 3

I can remember even as a young child my dad watching old Three Stooges shorts on TV, mostly on WGN, a TV station out of Chicago that use to air them a lot on Sunday mornings. I used to laugh at the silly ways The Stooges would smack each other and all the silly faces they would make when they were worked up over whatever was annoying them at the time. While my Dad liked The Stooges, my Mom was the opposite and was not amused by their slapstick antics and was by no means a fan. I think my brother liked them like I did because I can remember watching them with him and him laughing at them as well. Besides the short films, I also really enjoyed watching the Three Stooges movies with my favorite being, of course, them meeting Hercules.  I can remember watching this film on TBS and loving every cheesy sword and sandal moment.  I can also remember watching the cartoon at my grandparents’ house with my cousin Nathan on VHS. I also always wanted 3 ¾” action figures of The Stooges that I could have had as characters in my Toy Wars.  Imagine Moe slapping Han Solo or Larry poking the eyes of Captain Power; that would have been some epic stuff. Even at the age of 36, I still find myself really enjoying The Three Stooges and can say they were a part of my childhood that was good memories watching with my Dad and brother.

MBDYONA EC001

On January 26, 1962, Columbia Pictures released a comedy sword and sandal film that mixed the Greek hero Hercules with the slapstick goofballs The Three Stooges that consisted of Moe, Larry and Curly Joe at the time. The film had The Stooges helping a down and out scientist with his experiment to create a time machine, and by accident The Stooges, the scientist and his girlfriend are flung back to ancient Greece and come face to face with an evil king and his henchman Hercules. The film was filled with lots of moments of silly comedy, and the Stooges played off Hercules who was the prefect straight man who had no time for their silly antics. The film starred Quinn Redeker, Vicki Trickett, Samson Burke and Emil Sitka and was, and still is, my favorite of all the Three Stooges movies. The plot is filled with lots of fun surprises, but I figured we would save that for the comic adaptation made by Dell. I used to not only watch this film on TV but also on VHS and later on DVD.  So do yourself a favor and check it out if you’re into sword and sandal films and Three Stooges comedy.

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In 1965, Saturday Morning Cartoons as well as after school kids programs on TV were very import to stations as they tried to lock viewers for their station over the other and many production companies took advantage of this as they made syndicated programs and so was born The New 3 Stooges that combined live action segments to intro the cartoon and was distributed by Normandy Productions. Each episode ran for 30 minutes and had a total of 4 seasons and 156 episodes with 40 live segments shot making many of the cartoons use the same intro, confusing the viewer. The cartoon was a pretty big hit at the time and reruns can still be seen on TV to this day on Me-TV and Boomerang as well as can be found on many cheap dollar DVDs and VHS as well as all 156 episodes on DVD thanks to Image Madacy Entertainment. It should also be noted that many of the episodes are in the Public Domain and that for some time The Stooges were in a legal battle with Normandy over the show’s profits. So I am sure if you grew up watching classic cartoons, you have seen a few episodes of this series and have fond memories of it.

The New 3 Stooges

In 2012, someone in Hollywood decided that the world needed a new Three Stooges movie that would have three new actors step into the shoes of Moe, Larry and Curly as well as recycle plots from many of their short films. This time around Chris Diamantopoulos played Moe, Sean Hayes of Will & Grace fame played Larry and Will Sasso of MADTV played Curly. The plot had The Stooges having to go into the cruel world in order to get money to save the orphanage they grew up in after they could not afford the insurance due to all the accidents the Stooges have caused. During this adventure, they stumble on a murder for hire plot as well as go their separate ways after a fight leaves them at odds. In the end, they stop the murder, patch up their friendship and get the money needed to save the day thanks to Moe and MTV…yep, the one time music station. I saw the film in the theater with Josh Weinberg, and we both thought it was okay.  I watched it again with my Dad when I bought it for him for Christmas. The film did $54,819,301.00 at the USA box office for 20th Century Fox, but was trashed by the critics. I should also say that The Three Stooges showed up on WWE Monday Night Raw and got booed by the crowd, and they only cheered when Kane choke-slammed Curly!

THE THREE STOOGESthe three stooges 2012 posterNew Stooges 2

So I am sure you are wondering who played Hercules in The Three Stooges Meet Hercules…it was Samson Burke.  Now I am sure some of you are now asking who is Samson Burke, well I am here to tell you a little about him. Samson was born on April 8, 1929 in Montreal, Quebec, Canada and got a degree in physical education as well as wrestled and swam for Canada in the 1948 Summer Olympic Games. In the 1950’s, he became a bodybuilder even winning Mr. Canada, Mr. Montreal and Mr. Muscle Beach, and his pure power also lead him into becoming a pro wrestler where he went under the name Sammy Berg and wrestled such legends as Lou Thesz, Nick Bockwinkel and Johnny Valentine. Samson also got bitten by the acting bug and started to appear in sword and sandal films like “The Revenge Of Ursus”, “Toto vs. Maciest” and “The Three Stooges Meet Hercules”. When the sword and sandal genre faded, he continued to act in such films as “The Triumph of Robin Hood” and “Sartana The Gravedigger”. In the 1980’s, he moved to Hawaii and retired from acting in the late 80’s, and as of 2009 he ran his own fitness business. Samson, who is 86, still makes appearances at conventions and is a beloved icon of Three Stooges lore and remains one of the only actors to play Hercules not as a hero but as a jerk!

Samson Burke

So before we take a look at the Dell Comic adaptation, I will pause for a moment to let you get another plate of food…go on, I can wait…. you good? Okay, let’s continue then, shall we? I want to thank an Ebay seller for having this issue in stock even though they had it listed as in great shape but it came complete with water damage and mold and a very strong rotten ink smell.  So yeah, great shape it is not! Before we get to the review I want to thank you for spending a part of your Thanksgiving with me.  I should also note that I grade this issues on a star scale of 1 to 4 and am looking for how well the comic stays to the source material, its entertainment value and its art and story. So let’s get on that time machine with Moe, Larry and Curly Joe, and let’s not forget our turkey leg and see just why Hercules is being a henchman jerk to a evil ruler. I am going to guess he is upset because someone ate the last corn on the cob, but that’s just a rumor.

The Three Stooges Meet Hercules 1

The Three Stooges Meet Hercules # 1  **1/2
Released in 1962    Cover Price .15     Dell Comics     #208 of ??

Moe, Larry and Curly Joe are working at a drugstore that is being rocked by the next-door neighbor inventor Schuyler Davis whose experiment to make a time machine is going a little crazy. While The Stooges like him, the owner of the drugstore, Ralph Dimsal, hates him and wants him to fail in his attempt to time travel and even tampers with his plans. Schuyler is in love with Diane Quigley, and she gives him only two more days to get his time machine done before she walks away from their relationship because he is spending all his time on it and not her. All the while Curly Joe has made some pills that calm things down, and they use it on Schuyler’s machine.  After the Stooges try and help, it causes them as well as Schuyler and Diane to travel back in time to 900 B.C.! They land in the middle of a battle and meet Odius and his right hand man Hercules and help them take the crown of Ithaca from Ulysses when his men flee that battle. Odius takes a liking to Diane and has a feast for his new friends, but when Schuyler figures out they helped an evil man get into power he has The Stooges set Ulysses free after he had been captured. Ulysses escapes, and The Stooges and Schuyler are punished to work the rest of their lives on a slave ship, but after some time they are able to taste freedom when Schuyler gains muscle mass and a King thinks that he is Hercules and asks them to kill a two headed Cyclops that has been eating the kingdom’s live stock! With the help of the pills, Schuyler beats the Cyclops, the Cretan Bull and a Hydra and builds the name of Hercules. Meanwhile the real Hercules is not pleased with the fake and gets his chance to challenge Schuyler to an arena fight when The Stooges and he come to the castle to stop the wedding of Odius and Diane. In the arena Schuyler manhandles Hercules and makes him promise to turn good and help Ulysses reclaim the throne.  He along with The Stooges save Diane and head to the time machine and return home, only in the end for Schuyler to punch out Dimsal!

This is one of those adaptations that does a great job of capturing the silly story and the goofy characters that made the film such a classic in the first place. The plot of the comic is a great mix of many genres like comedy, sword and sandal and science fiction, and they make them all blend so well together. The plot has three dim whit drugstore workers as well as a scientist and his girlfriend being flung back in time to ancient Greece, and by doing so they change history and must make things right before they return to modern times.  To make things worse, Hercules is not the hero icon we all believed but is an ego driven creep who works for the side of the evil King. The Stooges are screw ups, but their heart is always in the right place.  If not for Curly Joe’s pills, they all would be in serious trouble many times. Moe is the hotheaded and smarter of the group, Larry in this just seems like a bit player who is around to get smacked and deliver jokes and Curly Joe is the dumb one who might not be as dumb as everyone thinks. Diane is just a sweet beautiful young woman who acts as the love interest to both the film’s hero and villain. Schuyler is the main hero who turns from nerdy wimp to strong nerd and even matches strength with Hercules and brings down the evil king. Hercules is a smug ego driven super strong man who reminds you of the bully jock in high school, and funny enough he is beaten down and made to look a fool by a man who he viewed as weaker. Hercules in this comic’s good guy legend was really built by Schuyler, who forces him to stop being a jerk and be the hero he can be. King Odius is a cruel man who doesn’t get much time in the comic to show his true evil ways but is given enough for the reader not to like him. As always with most Dell Comics I could not find the artist’s name, but I must say it’s very cartoonish in nature and while good, at some times it appears like a talented 10 year old did it, but I still found myself enjoying it. Over all this is a cool comic adaptation, and while not as good as the Steve Reeves Hercules comics by Dell, it still was a perfect read for this Thanksgiving update. Check out some samples of the artwork below and see the cheesy cartoon nature of this fun issue.

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It’s weird that The Three Stooges didn’t meet more Greek and mythology icons. I mean who wouldn’t want to see “The Three Stooges Meet Samson” or “Maciste and The Three Stooges Save A Roman Holiday” or better yet “Three Stooges and a Strong Man”…so many missed opportunities. Well our next update will be in December, so I am thinking that we will do something fun and toy-related so let’s take a look at Starriors, a robot toy line that was created by Marvel Comics and Tomy Toys that had a four issue mini series. So until then I hope you have a great Thanksgiving and remember to read a comic or three and support your local horror host.

Starriors logo

From Movies To Comics: The Ladies Of Seduction Cinema

Welcome back to Rotten Ink, or, if your a first time reader, thanks for visiting my little geeky place on the web! When I was a teenager one of my closest friends was Jason Gilmore, who was a guy I worked with at Kroger.  We were both baggers, and both of us were rowdy late teens who liked to listen to Danzig, watch pro-wrestling and play Nintendo 64 or Sony Playstation. I can remember many nights Jason and I, with bowls full of junk food and glasses filled with pop, would watch films all night or play video games.  Most of the times the films we would watch were cheesy action films and b-grade horror flicks.  On many of these binge nights of watching films I saw the likes of many Sonny Chiba Kung-Fu flicks and Jess Franco’s terrible shot on video masterpieces, and this is where we also discovered the world of Horror Parody films made by Seduction Cinema that not only packed in silly jokes but also lots of hot women who didn’t mind getting naked. This update is about two comic adaptations of Seduction Cinema films, and I will also share how I found out about the likes of Darrian Cain and Tina Krause. So sit back and relax and take a trip down the wild and sexy world of Seduction Cinema.

Misty Mundae and Creature Hand

My brother Bryan used to always buy horror film magazines like Video Watchdog, Fangoria, Cult Movies, Psychotronic Video and Alternative Cinema, a magazine that showcased films made by Tempe, W.A.V.E, Troma and Camp Motion Pictures among many other independent studios.  These magazines are where I learned about films like Psycho Sisters and first set my eyes on the lovely Tina Krause and so much more in between. The appeal of the magazine was that it covered films, directors and actors that the other horror magazines at the time would not touch and was a great tool when trying to find a VHS film to rent from the local rental store. I can remember always looking at films made by W.A.V.E. with such titles like Sleepover Massacre and Danger In Blue (these are some of the tame ones) that showcased women being murdered and chased by attackers and thinking “Wow, these are sleazy” as if you paid the right amount of money you could have the actresses act out your movie or fantasies like brushing their hair or putting on shoes. But this magazine will always have a special place in my heart; as I stated before it introduced me to Tina Krause as well as the wild parody world of Seduction Cinema! So here is to all of you who worked on Alternative Cinema Magazine for showcasing the films and actors that would have went unnoticed.

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VHS and DVD collecting was always a popular hobby for me and my friends, and once more Jason Gilmore was one of those friends who loved to hit Suncoast in the Dayton Mall or Second Time Around on Brown Street and look for films that we wanted to check out on one of our movie marathon nights. The first Seduction Cinema films I ever saw were The Erotic Witch Project and Titanic 2000, two films we found on VHS at Suncoast. I can remember that while we watched the cheesy sex comedies, we would make comments on how hot the actresses were and laughed about just how bad the comedy was. Jason picked Erotic Witch because it starred Darian Caine, and I choose Titanic because of Tina Krause. Over the years I picked up a few more movies with Krause, and the first Seduction Cinema I ever picked up on DVD was Mistress Frankenstein a super cheesy flick that starred Darian as the monster.  Another movie that stands out is My Vampire Lover, a film my then girlfriend Misty loved, and she became a fan on the pin up model Paige Richards who starred in it. When I became a movie reviewer Bloodline Video’s website many great companies were sending us DVD’s for reviews that included Paramount, Elite, Anchor Bay, SRS Cinema and of course Pop Cinema, the parent company of Seduction. Sometimes I miss the days of reviewing movies as it was always a fun time to sit down in front of the TV and fire up the DVD player and watch and write about the movie.  Maybe one day I will return to doing so.

Erotic Witch ProjectTitanic 2000Mistress FrankesteinMy Vampire Lover

But thanks to being a reviewer I was loaded up with many of the “classic” Seduction Cinema Titles and many of the actresses became names I was familiar with so I figured that I would take this time and give you a rundown on some of my favorites, you know the ones who made some of these cheesy movies better just by showing up and showing out, so here is my top 4 actresses for Seduction Cinema.

AJ Khan

AJ Khan

# 4 on my list is the one and only AJ Khan. AJ was born Anju Jena McIntyre in New Delhi, India on June 18th 1977 but when still an infant her family moved to Phoenix, Arizona.  When she turned 18, she moved to New York were she started to work as a model, dancer and actress and made a name for herself being in music videos, and later she became a sex symbol by posing nude in such magazines as Penthouse and Portfolio. Around this time she also changed her name to AJ Khan and was a professional dominatrix. But in 2000, she began acting in Seduction Cinema soft core parody films in titles like “Erotic Witch Project 2: Book of Seduction”, “Daughters Of Darkness”, “The Erotic Mirror” and “That 70’s Girl” to name a few. Around this time she also was working with Rick Savage on S&M films and even directed a film called “Kinky Casting Couch”. As of 2014 she is still working in independent films and is even in an all female band called Buffalo Gals and has toured with said group. AJ is a beautiful woman who is an exotic beauty and is one heck of a good actress in these sleazy and cheesy movies.

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So let’s take a look at my #3 actress in the world of Seduction Cinema, shall we?

Darian Caine

Darian Caine

Darian was born in Amherst, Massachusetts on October 24, 1973 and was a cheerleader during her time in school.  This helped her when she wanted to become a model when she went to live in New York. Darian modeled in many catalogs for many products from lingerie to shoes and was a stunning beauty. During this time she also started to take small extra roles in TV shows like Law & Order and did so until she became bored with the mainstream work she was doing. So she took a different route with her career that including being in adult magazines like Swank and Leg Show and as well became an actress for Seduction Cinema and for the most part was the original poster woman for the company and was on most of the company’s promotional items. Her first role was in a film called “Girl Explores Girl: The Alien Encounter,” and she went on to be in such films as “The Erotic Witch Project”, “Mistress Frankenstein”, “The Sexy Sixth Sense” and “The Erotic Ghost” to name a few. Besides Seduction Cinema films, Darian became a very popular actress for many independent horror films and still remains as lovely as ever. She also made two films for After Hours Cinema, a spin off from Seduction that are a little more adult in nature with one being called “Darian Caine My Pleasures.” Darian’s looks reminds me of a hot goth gal mixed with a metal chick, and that’s a-ok with me!

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So we have seen AJ and Darian so far, and now it’s for my # 2 actress!

Misty Mundae bound

Misty Mundae

Misty Mundae was born Erin Brown in Illinois on October 16 1979 and began her acting career in films made by Factory 2000, a company made by William Hellfire. But after making these cheap films with such titles as “Vampire Strangler” and “The Bizarre Case Of The Electric Cord Strangler,” she began making films for Seduction Cinema and quickly became the company’s biggest and brightest star and became the go to girl for erotic movie parodies. She was in such “classics” as “Erotic Survivor”, “Mummy Raider”, “Roxanna”, “Lust In The Mummy’s Tomb”, “Sin Sisters”, “The Lord Of The G-Strings” and so many more! But also around this time, Misty was starring in Horror Films for E.I. Cinema (Pop), the parent company for Seduction in such films as “Screaming Dead”, “Lust For Dracula”, “Shock-O-Rama” and “Bite Me”. By 2005 she was cutting down her roles in Seduction Cinema titles and began taking roles in bigger budget films under the name Erin Brown as well as TV shows even getting a major role in The Masters Of Horror in a episode called “Sick Girl” and went on to be in such films as “The Rage,” “Holocaust Cannibal” and TV Shows like “Lingerie” and “C.S.I.”. Misty is still an active actress and has even directed a few films like “Voodoun Blues”, “Lustful Addiction” and “Confessions of a Natural Beauty”. What set Misty apart from many of the actresses in these type of films is that she had a girl next door look to her, and she was not made of plastic like so many are, plus on film she gave off a nice girl aura. I for one must say I am a Misty Mundae fan and enjoy her work in horror films as I feel she was fantastic in The Rage and Sick Girl. The first film I ever saw her in was Mummy Raider, a take on the video game series Tomb Raider.

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Are you ready for my # 1 actress in Seduction Cinema history? And I am sure it will be no shock to anyone…

Tina Krause

Tina Krause

Born on July 29, 1970 Tina Krause began her acting career in 1994 after being spotted at a Chiller Theatre Convention and before that she was a graphic designer and 3D illustrator. Her first film was a Horror film called “Sorority Slaughter” and from this moment on she became an instant hit for fans who enjoy low budget films and stunning scream queens. Many more film roles from WAVE would follow that included “Rana Queen Of The Amazon”, “Female Mercenaries On Zombie Island”, “Sorority Slaughter 2” and many others. In 1998, she made the leap into Seduction Cinema/E.I movies with her first being the original “Psycho Sisters” and many more would follow like “Vampire’s Seduction”, “Crimson Nights” and “Misty’s Secret” as well as many films for Factory 2000, the same company who brought Misty Mundae into the spotlight. Over the years Tina has starred in many films and even was in my good friend Chris Seaver’s Lord of the Rings parody film “Quest For The Egg Salad” where she played an elf named Nienna. Tina is still acting and has many upcoming films this year like “Scars Of A Predator” and “Hunters”, not to mention she also models and is as stunning as ever.  While she was not rammed down your throat like many of the other Seduction actresses, I can safely say that Tina remains my favorite and her beauty is unmatched by all of the Seduction girls past and present. The first time I saw Tina was in a copy of Alternative Cinema magazine and the first full movie of hers was Titanic 2000.

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Seduction Cinema has slowed down on making sexy movie parody films as of late, and they don’t seem to have an actress that is the face of the company like they did with Darian and Misty and now focus a lot on independent horror films and classic smut reels.  To be honest, I really dig that they have started to put out more horror flicks like “Phantom of The Grindhouse”, “Porkchop” and “Babysitter Massacre”. But now I think it’s time to take a look at the comics based on Seduction Cinema films, and I want to thank Amazon for having them in stock. I want to remind you that I grade these on a standard 1-4 star rating and base it on entertainment value, quality of the story, the art and how true it stays to the source martial.  So are you ready to get your Seduction on…wait that sounds gross let’s just start with the comic reviews.

Playmate of the apes 1

Playmate Of The Apes  # 1  **1/2
Released in 2012   Cover Price $9.99   Seduction Cinema Comics   #1 of 1

Deep in space Commander Gaylor is asleep as her two shipmates Lt. Fornication and Lt. Pushkintucushkin decide to make out with each other and press the do no push button causing their ship to crash on a planet filled with monkeys who act like humans! The girls are taken prisoner and are forced to dance at a strip club to see if they have “soul” and are under the watch of an ape woman named Dr. Cornholeus and a fuzzy gorilla named Dr. Kweera who want to prove to the ape in charge, General Lade, that the new human women from space can dance. Lade is having none of it and is upset at the idea that a human woman has the soul to dance, and this causes them to send away Lt. Fornication and Lt. Pushkintucushkin to an unknown location making their fate a mystery. Commander Gaylor is freed from her cell along with a wild woman named Uvula, and with the two Ape doctors, they go on the run. Lade and his men find out and go on the hunt for the missing human women, but Gaylor only wants to get to her ship so she can go home.  On the journey they meets a barbarian queen who takes the wanted group to her village. But during a rap and dance party at the human village Lade and his men find them and are about to kill them all until a God like figure called The Missing Link, an ape with a human head, tells them that ape and man are the same and the hatred goes out the window as they all have a big party! In the end with some chewing gum they fix Gaylor’s ship and she is off only to land on a planet where everyone is a chicken!

This comic feels like a more adult version of a Cracked Magazine parody of Planet Of The Apes that could have been in their classic magazine. And I should note it has plenty of big oversized naked comic boobs to make it not suitable for younger comic readers. The plot is paper thin and is about three lesbian astronauts crashing on a planet run by apes.  They are forced to dance and are hunted down when some escape. None of the characters are super fleshed out so I will try my best to give you all a little something about the leads of this comic adaptation. Commander Gaylor is a strong willed woman who knows what she wants in life and also has the ability to dance making her stand out among the other females of the planet. Lt. Fornication and Lt. Pushkintucushkin are dimwit goofs who are throwaway characters in this comic and only act as the two who are responsible for the crash and are quickly written out of the comic story. Dr. Cornholeus is a female ape who believes in human woman and think that they do have soul and can dance. Dr. Kweera is a fuzzy ape who is around for one liners and filler. Uvula is a mindless beautiful savage woman who adds nothing but a make out scene to the comic, and the same can be said for the barbarian queen. General Lade is an ape who hates human women and thinks they are all soulless beasts who are good for nothing. And last is the strange Missing Link who has a human head and a body of a gorilla who in a few words makes all the hate between the apes and humans go away, making you wonder what they hell took him so long to do so! The comic is filled with all types of cameos from the likes of C3PO from Star Wars to Hanna Barbara’s Magilla Gorilla truly giving it that Cracked or Mad magazine feel and quality with this just pushing more of adult humor. The art is done by Noel Anderson and is really good and has a cartoon look to it, think Archie Comics meets Star Comics and you have the style.  The downside is that the characters look NOTHING like the actresses that play them in the film. While not perfect, it still is a fun silly read that holds true to the nature of a Seduction Cinema movie.

Playmate of Apes Art 1

Well from apes now to a spider-like superheroine (and I am not talking about Marvel’s Spider-Woman), we are talking about Spider-Babe! So let’s get to her adventure, shall we?

SpiderBabe 1

Spider Babe  # 1  **1/2
Released in 2012   Cover Price $9.99   Seduction Cinema Comics   #1 of 1

Patricia Porker is a nerd high school student who has a rich best friend named Lisa and lives with her Aunt Maybe and Uncle Flem.  While at school she gets bitten by a radioactive spider that turns her into a superhero who is turned on by other woman and has super strength. Patricia meets Lisa and her sister Lucinda for a short time and gets invited by her friend’s sister to come visit her work, and that night to get some money Patricia has a pro wrestling match as a masked fighter called Spider Babe against the undefeated woman’s champ Queen Bee and spanks her in the ring! After the match, a robber makes a get away and shoots and kills her Uncle Flem so as Spider Babe she takes him down, and from this moment on she becomes a super hero! Meanwhile Lucinda tests an experiment on herself and becomes a pissed off baddie named Femtilian who recruits a gang of clowns to take over the town. Patricia’s life is going good as she has moved in with her friend Lisa and even had saved the boy she likes, Mike, from a pack of red necks! But in the end as Spider Babe she comes face to face with Femtilian, and the two battle in the streets that leads them on top of a building where they learn each others’ true identities.  When Femtilian tries to trick Spider Babe, she accidentally knocks her from the building killing her and turning Lisa into a hater of Spider Babe in the end.

This comic adaptation is a cross between the film its based on, Spider-Man – the film it’s a parody of and once more Cracked Magazine. The plot is a nerd girl gets bitten by radioactive spider and turns into a hot and bothered super hero who takes on a super villain that turns out to be her best friend’s sister. Or I could safely also say that the comic is all about Patricia Porker’s butt as that seems to be the focus on many panels as well as many jokes. Patricia Porker or Spider-Babe is a young woman who is smart, clumsy, in love and loves her best friend Lisa as well as Mark but can’t get her mind off Lucinda, who seems to be her dream lover. Lucinda or Femtilian is a master mind criminal who wants to take over the city with the help of her clown gang and will do whatever she can to gain that power.  Too bad she gets beat up super quickly by Spider Babe and is knocked off a building to her death. The rest of the characters are all throwaways who do what little they can to help move yet another paper thin plot along. The issue is packed with cheesy one liners, some fist to fist action and of course girls making out and captures the goofy nature of the film it’s based on making it a fun read. Like Playmate Of The Apes, this comic has some great cameos like comic strip character Dagwood and even Sylvester P. Smythe from Cracked Magazine! The art is once more well done by Noel Anderson and still doesn’t look like the actresses who played the parts but I found myself not caring as I liked the Archie cartoon look. Not much more can be said about this comic besides if you like your super hero comic laced with sleaze, then this is something I am sure you would like.

SpiderBabe Art 1

So as you can see, these comics are cheesy fun filled with all the charm and nudity of the films and then some as they add in nice over the top cameos from popular characters from movies, TV and magazines. So as of 2015 and this update, I have yet to hear about any other plans for new comics to be made in this series and that’s a shame as I feel that many of their Seduction titles and LOTS of their horror titles would make good comics as I would love to see comics based on Splatter Farm, Babysitter Massacre, and Video Violence.  But time will only tale if more issues are in the fates. Our next update will be coming from Monster Bash Convention again, and we will be taking a look at Fantaco’s adaptation of Night Of The Living Dead.  So make sure to come back and visit for that one! So until next time, read a comic or three, watch a movie or two and support your local horror host.

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Marvel At The Movies Part 2: Rise Of The Machines

Welcome back to not only Rotten Ink but also Marvel Theater, a place where we can talk about those amazing comic adaptation made by the comic juggernaut back in the 80’s and 90’s. I really wish that Marvel had not been sold to Disney some years back as I feel that the overall vibe of the company switched from solid stories and fun events and adaptations for the readers, to making huge budget movies and large “epic” events that con people into buying mountains of issues they don’t need. But I guess we can’t change the past…or can we? You see for this Marvel At The Movies, we will be taking a look at the likes of Terminator 2, Transformers The Movie and Robocop 2, and if T2 taught me anything, it’s that the past can be changed to save the future! But really I chose these three films as I feel that in the 80’s and early 90’s robots and cyborgs were some of the most popular subjects in comics, video games and movies, and these three best fit that time of the robotic obsession. So grab some popcorn, get yourself a large soda or Icee and let’s get the perfect seats as we step into the theater for Marvel At The Movies Part 2. marvel-at-the-movies 2 I want to remind everyone that I grade these comics on a standard 1-4 star scale and look for entertainment value, art, story and how true the comic is to its source material, and I will give these comics a little slack on not keeping 100% to the film because they have only so many pages to contain it all in, but it will only be a little slack. I also want to thank Lone Star Comics, Half Price Books, Bell Book And Comic, Ebay as well as Game Swap Kettering for having these issues in stock.

Transformers Movie 1Transformers Movie PosterTransformers Movie 2 Released in 1986 by DEG, this first animated film was a showcase for the Transformers and a way for them to pass the torch from Optimus Prime to the new hip character Rodimus. The film has the battle between the Autobots and Decepticons raging hard and leaves Optimus Prime dead and Megatron injured at death’s door. But things change when the Matrix of Leadership is passed down and the Decepticons become the henchmen for the living robot planet Unicron. This animated film was a hit with the Brassfield brothers as we watched it many times on VHS that our parents would rent for us from the rental store. The film of course was based on the Hasbro toys as well as the Toei Animation cartoon that was super popular and helped secure Transformers’ spot as a top brand in children’s entertainment. I can remember many kids on the playground in Waynesville talking about this film as it shook the foundation of what we all knew and loved about The Transformers! The film did poorly at the box office, only grossing $5,849,647.00 but remains a cult classic film that is loved by young and old. So let’s not waste anymore time, and let’s take a look at Marvel’s three issue adaptation of Transformers The Movie. Transformers The Movie 1

Transformers: The Movie # 1 ***
Released in 1986   Cover Price .75   Marvel Comics   #1 of 3

Unicron is a planet eating robot who is on his way to eat the planet Cybertron that is being controlled by Megatron and the Decepticons but cannot when the Matrix of leadership is still fueling energy to the Autobots! Megatron, thanks to Laserbeak, finds out about a plan that has some members of the Autobots going to Earth, and this allows Megatron to get an upper hand as they kill all the Autobots on board and and hide on the ship coming to the Earth base. Rodimus Prime watches as the ship lands and all the Decepticons come out and attack the Autobots.  During the battle Optimus Prime and Megatron come face to face in a brutal showdown that leaves Megatron wounded and Optimus Prime at death’s door. The Autobots run off the Decepticons as Optimus dies and passes the Matrix of Leadership to Ultra Magnus, who now becomes the leader. The Decepticons turn on the injured Megatron and the other hurt Decepticons and throw them into space where the are greeted by Unicron who heals Megatron and makes him more powerful.  He even gets a name change as he is now Galvatron and has the goal to destroy the Matrix of Leadership!

This is a great comic adaptation, and I must say changes enough from the animated movie to give it a slightly fresh feel. The plot of this issue has Megatron and Optimus Prime duking it out in order for both of them to be wounded bad enough that Prime dies so he can pass the Matrix down and for Megatron to be near death’s door and have his own robot companions turn on him allowing him to make a deal with Unicron to become more powerful and get a make over complete with a name change. The action is fast and brutal, and the death of Optimus Prime is impactful and handled well, even if it doesn’t capture the full sad moment like the film does. Optimus Prime is outstanding as the issue’s lead hero and stands his ground even when the odds are against him. He, much like Duke from G.I Joe and Lion-O from Thundercats, is a perfect example of an 80’s leader. Megatron in this comic is cold blooded and wants to kill and conquer and almost seems to be getting gleeful as he kills fellow robots. Unicron is just a giant hungry planet in this issue and reminds me of Marvel Comics bad guy Glactus with all his world eating. The art in the issue is fantastic and captures the look of not only the movie it’s based on but also the comic series that Marvel had going on about the Transformers. To sum it up, great first issue, and I can’t wait to see what’s in store in the other two issues left in this adaptation! Transformers The Movie 2

Transformers: The Movie # 2  **1/2
Released in 1987   Cover Price .75   Marvel Comics   #2 of 3

Starscream is about to be crowned the new leader of the Decepticons when Galvatron and his new more powerful men show up and kill Starscream.  By doing so, they get the rest of the Decepticons to join their side in getting the Matrix of Leadership. Meanwhile Ultra Magnus, who is now the leader of the Autobots, gets a call that a living planet has eaten one of the moons of Cybertron.  He gathers the troops to help when they are attacked by Galvatron and his men but luckily are able to lose them by causing a meter shower in space. Hot Rod, Kup and the Dinobots are on a shuttle and are attacked and crash on a planet filled with a race of robots who run a crude court that leads to death penalties for Hot Rod, Cup and Grimlock who are all to be eaten by small razor toothed bots called Sharkticons, but are saved when the rest of the Dinobots join the fight and Grimlock scares the Sharkticons into being his followers and they attack their old masters! Hot Rod and crew meet Wheelie who says he has a ship they can all escape on.  Ultra Magnus and crew have been found by Galvatron.  Their main shuttle is shot down, so they get inside a tiny one that’s loosing control.  Galvatron is called back to Unicron, who has just eaten human Spike and Bumblebee!

This second issue does a nice job of moving the story along and does a fantastic job in showing the odds that are now stacked against the Autobots and just how evil Galvatron and Unicron are, as power seems to be their motivation in killing and destroying anything that gets in their way. I do also like how they show Galvatron not really wanting to be loyal to Unicron and if he could he would turn on the world eater. The plot has the Autobots on the run as Galvatron and his army are out to kill them and collect the Matrix of Leadership.  Ultra Magnus is being pushed to the limit as he must come up with a plan in order to defeat the Decepticons and stop Unicron from eating anymore planets. Ultra Magnus, while a strong leader type, also seems to be a little cold as he shrugs off the would be deaths of some of his fellow Autobots, and really as of yet hasn’t taken the fight to his enemies. Galvatron just doesn’t care and wants to kill as many Autobots as he can so that his pact with Unicron can come to an end.  he also gets joy in killing Starscream and does so with no remorse. This issue ends with a nice cliffhanger as it makes you wonder if Bumblebee and Spike are dead, as they both are eaten alive by Unicron! The artwork is done by Ian Akin & Brian Garvey and is fantastic and captures the movie as well as the on-going Marvel series’ look and feel. Over all this is a pretty solid issue and does a good job of bring the film to comic.  So let’s see how the final issue in this adaptation ends. Transformers The Movie 3

Transformers: The Movie # 3  **1/2
Released in 1987    Cover Price .75   Marvel Comics   #3 of 3

Ultra Magnus and crew crash on a planet of junk and meet a race of TV talking robots who watch as Galvatron attacks and rips apart Ultra Magnus, who could not open the Matrix.  This allows Galvatron to steal the Matrix, and he thinks he can use it against Unicron and make the giant planet eater his slave! As Galvatron leaves, Hot Rod and his band of Autobots have tracked Ultra Magnus to the junk planet and finds him dead and the TV Robots hostile! But after talking with them using a nonsense greeting, they become friends with the Autobots and rebuild Ultra Magnus.  They all join forces to stop Unicron and Galvatron from destroying anymore planets! Galvatron tries to use the Matrix against Unicron and fails and is eaten for his backstabbing and as further punishment Cybertron will be his next planet meal! As Unicron attacks Cybertron, Hot Rod and the Autobots come to the rescue and attack the giant robot and enter his insides via his eye! While inside Unicron’s body, Hot Rod runs into Galvatron, and the two start fighting and during this fight Hot Rod is able to open the Matrix of Leadership and becomes Rodimus Prime and not only beats Galvatron but also destroys Unicron from the inside causing him to blow up.  Rodimus saves all the remaining Autobots who were stuck in Unicron’s belly and takes back control of Cybertron!

The final issue of Transformers The Movie comic adaptation is good but also very rushed as the plot seems to fly by and the end payout is very lackluster. Hot Rod finds out he is the chosen one and becomes Rodimus Prime and leads the Autobots into war with Galvatron and Unicron and in a matter of minutes is able to beat them as well as the Decepticons who had taken over Cybertron. Hot Rod/Rodimus Prime is a good hero and only in the first issues does he show any immaturity and pretty much from the start shows that he has good leadership skills. Ultra Magnus is useless; not only does he get his butt kicked and the Matrix stolen, he also is ripped apart and goes down like a chump. It’s sad to see both Optimus Prime and Bumblebee killed off in this comic while Prime dies in the movie, Bumblebee does not but in this comic he sure does as does human Spike and many other old school Autobots. Megatron/ Galvatron is again one mean son of a gun who kills with pleasure and is so power hungry that he even tries to turn on a more powerful robot who controls him with unworldly powers. Unicron is a big bully who likes throwing his huge size around and while powerful, can be beaten with the light power of the Matrix. Ian Akin & Brian Garvey do the art again, and it’s fantastic and shows that Marvel did put some time and care into this movie adaptation even if it did feel rushed in the end. This is a nice kick off to this second Marvel at the Movies and makes me wonder how Robocop 2 and Terminator 2 will compare in quality. So to sum up the Transformers The Movie comic mini series, I would say solid work that was entertaining and was a nice counter piece to go alongside to movie for fans.

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From Rodimus Prime to Robocop, we now move from a giant robots to a police cop cyborg! Robocop 2 Movie 1Robocop 2 PosterRobocop 2 movie 2

The original Robocop was a blockbuster Action/Sci-Fi film.  So in 1990, when Robocop 2 was coming out fans like myself were super hyped for a new adventure for the law enforcement of the future! While the first film was dark and brutal, this second film took a more silly cheesy approach and made Robocop even more appealing for kids. The film had Robocop, during a bad time for the cops of the city, going after a drug lord who is slinging his new toxic fix onto the streets.  Both sides clash, and the drug lord himself is turned into a metal cyborg.  The streets of Detroit are wrecked as the two cyber men clash. I can remember that this film was very popular with the kids I knew.  My brother and I also enjoyed it, and we would watch it along with the first movie many times on VHS and HBO. Looking back at it now, it’s still a fun cheesy film, but it does lack the charm of the original.  The story that was written by Frank Miller is a little over the top and filled with eye rolling moments. But what I always thought worked for the film is the fact they got Peter Weller back to play Robocop and that they had him fight yet another out of control machine that was twice his size. Rumor has it that many of the actors of this film were very displeased with not only the shooting of the film but also many of the changes that were made to the script. This film would also mark the final time Weller played the future of law enforcement. The film did pretty well at the US box office bringing in $45,681,173.00 and a decent money maker for Orion Pictures. As I stated, I liked the film growing up and even still don’t mind it as an adult so I can’t wait to see what Marvel does with this three issue adaptation. Robocop 2 1

Robocop 2  # 1  ***
Released in 1990   Cover Price $1.00   Marvel Comic   #1 of 3

Detroit is in deep trouble as the police are on strike. The O.C.P corporation has loaned the city money, and because they missed the first payment, they now own the city.  Plus they are trying to make a more updated version of Robocop that has been leading to many suicidal cyborgs.  Worse, a drug called Nuke made by a man named Cain is flooding the streets! But not all cops are off the road as Robocop, his partner Lewis and a few other cops are still busting crooks and trying to have a war on Nuke! Robocop learns that Cain has a few trusted associates that include a 12-year-old boy named Hob, femfatale Angie and cop turned drug addict rat officer Duffy. Robocop busts Duffy red handed who spills the beans about where to find Cain.  Robocop goes to but him but sadly is outwitted.  Cain and his gang of thugs rip Robocop apart and leave his destroyed body in front of the police station as a warning.

This first issue is great and really captures the action of the film as at no point does the story really slow down; it’s action and sci-fi adventure from page to page. The plot of this first issue is simple, a drug is on the street called Nuke being made and distributed by a man named Cain and his thugs.  The town’s only hope is Robocop, who sadly is outmatched and turned into a tin can by the end of the issue. Throw is a major corporation trying its best to disrupt the city so they can own it.  Robocop is as noble and on point as he is in film and comics and makes for one likable good guy. What works about Robocop is the fact he is more then just a machine as it’s clear some of his human side comes out and he wants to do the right thing by stopping Nuke from corrupting the youth of Detroit. Robocop even disobeys orders to try and stop the mastermind of the drug, but sadly it backfires and he gets his metal butt kicked.  So far all we know about Cain is that he is a murderer, a very mean guy and makes a drug called Nuke…so yeah, he is a terrible person. Officer Anne Lewis is his partner on the streets, and while she takes a back seat in this issue I am sure she will have a bigger part in the upcoming issues. The end panel of Robocop’s body being seen by the cops is stuff of nightmares! Really good comic adaptation so far, and I am looking forward to the rest of the issues. Mark Bagley does the art, and it’s pretty solid and captures the film as well as has that early 90’s look. The cover is great and has Robocop being shot by punks, and he don’t look happy as he is returning fire making it very eye catching. So let’s move on and see if Robocop can be rebuilt and take down Cain. Robocop 2 2

Robocop 2  # 2  **1/2
Released in 1990   Cover Price $1.00   Marvel Comic   #2 of 3

Robocop is on life support, and O.C.P is dragging their feet on helping him and are moving ahead with a plan to build a Robocop II from the brain of a killer instead. Cain and his men kill Duffy as they feel he had ratted them out.  This is to also serve as a message to those who stand in Cain’s way. By the time they do fix Robocop, they fill his program data with all types of weird orders that take away his ability to be a good cop by being light on major criminals and overreacting to people who smoke and cuss. Lewis is upset about the changes in her partner and along with his handlers at the department, they discuss a way to try and remove all the bad commands.  One idea is use a large amount of electricity. Robocop hears this and on purpose grads high voltage higher and rids his mind of the bad commands and fires up the cops on strike.  Together, they go after Cain and his men! Robocop busts Cain and roughs him up doing so.  In the end O.C.P pull the plug on the dying Cain and are going to use his brain for Robocop II as the young Hob takes over the drugmaking racket.

Robocop might have been down and out in issue 1, but a little ways into issue 2 he is back and ready to kick Cain’s drug making butt! This second issue’s plot has Robocop being rebuilt and taking down his most-wanted tagert Cain and does so with aggression and authority. Robocop, when reprogramed, was a weather loving, pep talk giving odd ball who would be lucky to arrest a 85 year old woman who just stole coffee from the local grocery store. Robocop back to normal is fired up and wastes zero time in going after Cain and ramming a motorcycle down his throat. Cain is sleazy as ever and thinks he’s untouchable until he himself is at death’s door and smacked down to reality. One odd thing is, why and the world would O.C.P want to use a man’s brain who is a drug making, murdering addict who craves power and thought of himself as a god….all I can say is they are doing this to themselves, and once more shows even in comics based on a movie, huge corporations are just out of touch. I really like this issue as well, but I felt like the plot and story in this one seemed rushed and besides Robocop, no other character is fleshed out. Mark Bagley does the art again, and the second issue cover is good by not nearly as eye catching as the first. With another good issue, let’s move onto the final adaptation issue and see just how well Marvel did with Robocop 2. Robocop 2 3

Robocop 2  # 3  **1/2
Released in 1990   Cover Price $1.00   Marvel Comic   #3 of 3

Robocop, who was once Officer Alex Murphy must tell his one-time wife that the man she loved is dead and that he as Robocop is just a tribute to his memory. The Mayor of the city is holding a telethon to try and save the city from getting into the hands of O.C.P and gets a call from Hobs who wants to make an offer to help save the city with cash in exchange to the city to back off on busting the selling of Nuke. O.C.P finds out about the meeting and send Cain now as the massive cyborg Robocop II to kill everyone.  While the Mayor escapes, Hob, Angie and many others are not so lucky as they are killed in cold blood. Robocop figures out the O.C.P is behind this and breaks into their lab and finds that they used Cain’s brain in the new machine, and he knows he must stop it. The deadline is here, and O.C.P now runs the city.  During the live take over on TV, they also introduce Cain as Robocop II to the audience, but when Cain has other things on his mind and starts to run wild, Robocop comes in and saves the day.  As the two battle it out on the streets of Detroit, it’s Robocop’s mind the beats the robo Cain who is still addicted to Nuke, and he uses that against him and is able to rip the brain from the machine and crush it on the street, killing it on impact. In the end O.C.P play the blame game on one of their own and get away with all the crappy things they did.

A really good, yet once more rushed finale to this Marvel Comic adaptation that captured the action of the film on comic pages. The final act in this series has Robocop finding out that O.C.P is using the mad man Cain’s brain to power a new robot cyborg who has just killed a warehouse full of people on the orders of the evil big business. And when Cain acts out, it’s Robocop who comes to the rescue and battles it to the death. Robocop, in this comic series, is a badass and even when the odds are against him as Robo Cain is more powerful and has way more weapons, he still finds a way to beat his stronger opponent down and even smash his brain on the street like roadkill. Cain as Robocop II is cold blooded and don’t care what it hurts as it even turns on its creators and only wants power and Nuke.  In fact he is a very classic movie bad guy as he is as soulless as they come. Poor Hob is shot and killed, and Angie gets stabbed leaving two criminals dead at the hands of their one time friend Cain. Officer Anne Lewis is Robocop’s loyal friend and partner, but her part never seems to pick up and she seems lost in the rushed shuffle. I will say that while I felt that the adaptation was sped along and at times things seem to happen without explanation as the lead up was cut out of the comic. I still really enjoyed this comic adaptation and felt that for the most part it did everything right. Mark Bagley did the art again, and it’s fantastic and really well done.  The cover for this third issue is just ok and is kind of sloppy looking. Another solid Marvel adaptation and so far chosing the winner will be very hard! Below is some art from the series for your robo enjoyment. I should also say that the art does make the characters look like the actors for the most part and Robocop looks fantastic.

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The Future of Law Enforcement to a robot from the future.

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Terminator 2 was the biggest film of 1991 beating out many other great films like Robin Hood: Prince Of Thieves, Disney’s Beauty And The Beast, Silence Of The Lambs, JFK, The Rocketeer, Star Trek VI and Freddy’s Dead The Final Nightmare to name very few, and it also marked in many peoples eyes, a sequel that was better then the original. The film follows another Terminator coming back in time to protect John Connor, the leader of the rebels in the future from another terminator who is made of liquid metal. The film was directed by James Cameron and brought back stars Arnold Schwarzenegger and Linda Hamilton from the original and turned up the action full blast and added a more drama to the mix as John builds a bond with his metal machine protector. In 1991, this film blew my socks off and was a movie I watched many, many times along with my brother who got the film on VHS for Christmas. The film was so amazing I can remember playing with G.I. Joes and acting as if they were characters from the movie, and then when the official toys came out, I rushed to buy a Terminator T-800. The film pushed Arnold as an even bigger top of the line action star and launched the career of Edward Furlong as well helped James Cameron become an in-demand director. The film rocked the US box office, bringing in a total of $204,843,345.00 making TriStar very happy. While I have read this Marvel comic adaptation before as the old library in Waynesville use to allow you to check out comics, I am excited to reread them and wish I still had one of my old Terminator 2 shirts so that I could squeeze into it to relive the time when T2 ruled the world of movies.

T2 1

Terminator 2  # 1  ***
Released in 1991   Cover Price $1.00   Marvel Comics   #1 of 3

John Conner is the target of Sky Net again, and this time they plan on taking him out while he is a teen and send a T-1000 model after him who is liquid metal and takes the look of a police officer.  The John Conner of the future sends a T-800 back that looks like the original Terminator. Meanwhile John’s mother is at an asylum and is trying her best to get to medium security so she can get visits from John and she fails her review, but The Terminators are on the track of John and find him at the mall’s arcade.  Both try to nab him, but John escapes on his motorbike as they both give chase. The T-800 saves him and tells him the truth of why he is here, and they both head to the asylum to save Sarah who is also being targeted by T-1000! Throw in Miles Dyson a worker for Sky Net who is working with the hand from the original Terminator as part of the cover up over the original attack from the future. Sarah Conner meanwhile is trying to escape the asylum on her own and ends the issue with taking her doctor hostage with a needle filled with drain cleaner.

The # 1 film of 1991 got the Marvel adaptation, and I found this first issue to be pretty good and keeps the action up and still finds enough time to put in that pesky plot to tie it all together. The plot in this one has two Terminators coming from the future to the past to get John Conner.  One wants to kill him, while the other wants to protect him, so it’s a race to John! Also throw in the fact his mom’s in a nut house and a big corporation is working on making the robots that will kill off the human race in future. The T-800 at this point is all business and orders and has no issues killing people that are not John in order to protect the teen, but is also loyal to John who even as a teen can order him around. The T-1000 is a cold steel killing machine who can change his appearance and even turn his hands into knives and spikes to use to kill off the humans who get in his way.  He can also mimic the voice of people he steals the appearance of. Sarah Conner is a woman who is sane in a world of the insane as she is looked at as a loony tune all because she knows all our fates in the future, but even while she is a prisoner ,she still has a fighting spirit. While the issue has some action, it also has the build to the story that while rushed, is well done and at all points I get what’s going on as they didn’t cut out important elements. Now for the downside of this issue and it’s one that really stands out and is in your face, that’s the bad art done by Klaus Janson. I am sorry I am not a fan of the sloppy 90’s art that plagued many comics at this time and for some reason Marvel went the sloppy art route with T2. The cover is great and reminds me of an old T-Shirt I had with the same design when I was younger. So a pretty solid start and can’t wait to get onto issue 2 and see how well Marvel keeps up with the film.

T2 2

Terminator 2  # 2  ***
Released in 1991   Cover Price $1.00   Marvel Comics   #2 of 3

John and T-800 get to the asylum and save Sarah, who at first is freaked out at the sight of The Terminator who looked like the one who tried to kill her in 1984. As John calms her down and they try to escape, the T-1000 also makes his move, and they all just barely escape his sharp pointy hands. Sarah thinks about destroying T-800 when they stop at a run down gas station to rest and they switch his brain chip to learn like a human, but John talks her out of it and the three travel to the desert to visit Sarah’s friend who houses all her guns and they prepare for war. While in the desert John and T-800 are starting to have a bond, and The Terminator is learning lingo and about human feelings. But things go south when Sarah leaves to kill Miles Dyson, and John and T-800 go after her to stop the murder.

The second issue starts off with action in the asylum but is really just the build up for the bond between John and T-800 making this issue one I have dubbed “A Boy and His Terminator.”  This is by no means a put down as I feel the issue is great and really well done and held my interest as I enjoyed every page. T-800 is now becoming more like a person than a machine in this issue as he learns not to kill people and how to use words like jerkwad. John Conner also turns from punk teen to caring teen that starts to come to terms with himself being the hope for the future and also shows he cares about human life. Sarah Conner, while a caring mother, is also overbearing and doesn’t show her son the affection he needs and is more about living the future then the present. T-1000 is badass but was slightly behind when it came to killing John at the asylum and then takes a back seat for the rest of the issue besides killing another cop along a stretch of highway. The cover is pretty eye catching and has John and T-800 on a motorcycle.  The inside is sadly once more done by Klaus Janson and has that same sloppy look. The art is truly the only thing taking me out of this otherwise solid Marvel adaptation, but let’s not let the terrible art get me down and move on to the third and final issue.

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Terminator 2  # 3  **1/2
Released in 1991   Cover Price $1.00   Marvel Comics   #3 of 3

Sarah Conner can’t kill Miles, and when John shows up with the T-800, they fill him in on the future and the rise of the machines. Miles takes them to the lab, and together they try and destroy any and all research that has to do with the original Terminator. Miles gives John the original Terminator’s hand and chip, and the police show up and open fire hitting Miles who has the trigger to the explosions they have set.  As John, Sarah and T-800 get away, Miles passes away and the building goes boom! As they flee, the T-1000 finds them and a chase happens that ends at a steel plant where the T-800 and the T-1000 have a final showdown.  While it looks bad for T-800, he has an ally in Sarah, and together they defeat T-1000 by knocking him inside a vat of molten steel. As John throws in the arm and chip, the T-800 says farewell to them and jumps into the molten steel and gives the thumbs up as mother and son watch their friend melt away.

This third issue slips a little in the quality story department and rushes way too much of the film’s finale as the big end fight between T-800 and T-1000 is way too fast and loses all the excitement of the film’s fight. Not to mention, they cut out the scene when T-800 uses the mini gatlin gun on the police cars from the lab’s window. Plus I feel the death of Miles Dyson has no impact in the comic as he is shot and left to die via explosion really quick. For that matter, the death of the T-800 is handled all wrong too as in the film he lowers himself in as the sadness builds in the comic he leaps in like a kid in a swimming pool. The plot of this final issue is this John and group destroy all the research being done that would create The Terminators and then have a final battle with the T-1000 in a steel mill where they defeat him and T-800 learns why humans cry as he must end his own life. T-800, while outdated compared to the T-1000, shows that newer is not better as he takes a beating and is still able to defeat his predecessor by burning him alive in molten steel. Not to mention he is the true hero of the story and does whatever it takes to protect John even risking his own mechanical body. T-1000 is still just a killing machine who sadly spends a lot of the issues looking for John and having brief fights with T-800.  That’s one thing that kind of stunk about this adaptation, the main villain felt like an after thought. And to be honest, besides killing a few humans and beating up T-800 for a few panels he goes down pretty easy in the end. John and Sarah stay the same as they did in issue 2, and Sarah only changes slightly as now she knows that she needs to show love and affection toward her son and not just bark orders. The comic while having violence never shows blood and keeps the comic very PG, and I’m okay with that as you get the point when people are being hurt. The characters in this film/comic would and could have made a great series from Marvel making this a tough on to pick what of the three films should have continued on as a comic, but again the thing working against this series is the bland and sloppy art of Klaus Janson that is just so cheesy bad that many times I found myself being annoyed by it. Below is some samples of the terrible artwork and you can be the judge for yourself if you like it out not.

T2 art 1T2 art 2T2 art 3

So before I choose which of these films should have gone on to become a full series from Marvel Comics, I want to once more have a Fantasy Warfare match that will pit all the bad guys from the series against each other to see who rules supreme of the world of robotic bad guys! The setting will be AK Steel in Middletown Ohio during a very cold winter and a snow storm has just hit toward the end of the day. So let’s sit back and read about the chaos that could have been if these titans ever fought. So get ready for Galvatron vs. Cain vs. T-1000!

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Jim Wilson Jr. is the last man to leave AK Steel that night as a major snow storm is hitting in Middletown, you see Jim is the janitor and while the workers got sent home for the evening due to driving risks his boss decided that Jim needed to mop all the floors and change some lightbulbs before he could leave to get home to his studio apartment at the Dayton Towers. Jim is about to lock up when he hears a noise from inside the factory that startles him, and it’s coming in from some molten steel that was just brought in from another steel plant early that morning as Jim slowly makes his way to the noise he lets out a very weak sounding “Is some one there?” as he turns the corner his fear turns to terror as he watches a liquid mass turn into a human form of a cop and it’s none other then the T-1000 who turns toward the janitor with his arm transforming into a knife and has murder in it’s cold eyes. Jim starts to run when he hears a massive rumble at on of the loading gates as the door bursts apart and in comes a Robot Cain who is covered with snow and his high on Nuke and is out of control with rage, Jim before Cain can see him hides behind the forklift as Cain spots the T-1000 and thinks that it’s a real cop and goes on the attack! T-1000 turns it’s sights from Jim to Cain as well and leaps into the air and tries to drive it’s now spiked hands into Cains head, but the attack fails for a moment as Cain catches T-1000 in air and rips him in two! Cain gloats with his “win” but to his surprise the T-1000 melts in mid tear in the air and reforms into his police cop shape and his hand a giant spike that he rams through the right shoulder of Cain, who in turn flings T-1000 off slamming him into the wall. As T-1000 stands up behind him, in the shadows giant red eyes appear and an echoing voice rings out saying “ENOUGH” and a fire blast erupts from the darkness blasting T-1000, the heat is intense and extreme and melts the liquid robot into a puddle! Cain looks on as oil is pouring out of his shoulder, Galvatron emerges from the shadows and raises his fist and comes down and crushes Cain like a pop can ending the battle fast and allowing Galvatron to go back into the darkness and find the rest he was seeking. After the battle has died down and Galvatron is napping Jim comes out from behind the forklift and looks around the plant and see’s the crushed body of Cain and the melted mess that was T-1000 and rushes to his old beat up Ram Truck parked outsides, the snow is falling even harder now and the Janitor is happy to have escaped his work alive this night.

Winner: Galvatron

Like Cain and T-1000 had a chance against a giant pissed off robot with a cannon arm! But while Transformers’ Galvatron might have won easily the Fantasy Warfare, I can say that Transformers: The Movie didn’t win The Marvel Comic award that I would like to see turned into a full series.  The reason being that Marvel already had a long running Transformers series going, and the fact I don’t know how hyped I would be to read about the adventures of Rodimus Prime. Robocop 2 was followed by a Marvel Comic series based on Robocop and again, not sure how much more life they could have gotten out of Cain. So the winner hands down would have to be Terminator 2, as I would like to see the T-800 take on the T-1000 again as well as see how John and Sarah deal with the rise of the machines not being over. But while I picked T2, I should also note that I would choose it only if they took Klaus Janson off the comic and put someone like Herb Trimpe on the art!

Winner T2

The Marvel Theater is getting ready to close, and the clean up crew is waiting for us to get out so they can clean up all the popcorn on the floor.  So I should tell you that our next update is going to be another Horror Host Icon as we take a look at that cool Detroit Vampire, Sir Graves Ghastly! So with that we should head out.  Make sure to read a comic or three, watch a movie at your favorite theater, and support your local Horror Host.

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Horror Host Icon: USA Saturday Nightmares

Welcome back to Rotten Ink.  Today’s update will be about that wonderful Saturday night block of horror known as USA Saturday Nightmares! I know many of you are saying how can this be about a Horror Host when the films and TV shows were aired with no host? Well simple, while no host was shown, the iconic voice of Alan Kalter would welcome us to the night’s fears and even give an introduction to the nights film making the show feel like a horror host program. So it’s truly my honor to present to you my readers and friends Horror Host Icon: USA Saturday Nightmares.

USA Saturday Nightmares Logo

Saturdays when I was a kid were a fantastic time for TV.  Not only was the day packed with classic cartoons all morning but it also was swamped with some great horror host programs like Commander USA’s Groovie Movies, Super Scary Saturday with Grandpa Munster and USA Up All Night. But one horror themed program that my brother and I looked forward to every Saturday night was Saturday Nightmares on USA.  It was like clock work as we would beg our parents to let us watch the night’s horror film and as an extra bonus they would show such TV shows as The Hitchhiker, Alfred Hitchcock Presents, Werewolf and Ray Bradbury Theater making for one spooky themed night. This is the place I first saw many great b-movie horror films like The Video Dead, Zombie Nightmare and Forever Evil and is also the place I got to see such classics as Friday The 13th and Prom Night. My brother and I would plant ourselves in front of the living room TV with a bowl of popcorn or potato chips as our parents would go watch TV in their room, and we would be sucked into the eerie terror glowing from the TV screen as most the times we would turn off the lights to add to the atmosphere and mood of the night’s feature movie. The block of programs was very simply formatted and would start at 8 pm with the intro to the show that would act as a way to show you the plot of the film as well as the two shows with a amazing voice over.  The most famous intro consisted of a haunted house with the camera going down a hallway where the pictures on the wall would morph from say Dracula to Frankenstein and the next from Freddy Kruger to Jason Voorhees. During breaks they would have a title card with the show’s logo and the voice intro-ing us in or out of a commercial break. Sometimes if the movie was running a little short on run time, they would fill in with a short horror film, the most popular being The Dummy that was also shown many times on HBO. Saturday Nightmares began in 1986 and would run till 1994 before USA would pull the plug on their horror block on Saturday nights.  This was a sad day indeed because by 1989 Commander USA was off the air and Up All Night only lasted 4 years more when it went off the air in 1998. Nowadays USA is a shell of what it used to be and now mainly focuses on Law and Order and C.S.I. reruns making for some boring and over played viewing. I will say that USA does still air WWE Raw as well as makes their own shows, but they are far from “America’s Favorite Cable Network” like they use to be.

USA Saturday Nightmares Logo 2Saturday Nightmares Logo 3Saturday Nightmares Warning

That’s something TV nowadays is really lacking, the horror program blocks that were so popular in the 80’s and 90’s, and when USA dropped the ball, TNT picked it up when they introduced Monstervison in 1993, but that series will be held for another Icon update. DATV in 2013 tried to make a great horror themed line up called Saturday Night Nightmares that showcased Baron Von Porkchop’s Terrifying Tales of The Macabre as well as Andy Copp’s cult movie review show Neon Madness and his “mix tape” style show called Psychotic Feed. But sadly the program block was too hard for them and myself to keep up on a weekly bases with new and fresh “cult” style shows so as quickly as it started it ended. I really wish USA Network would bring back Saturday Nightmares as well as Commander USA and Up All Night; I think it would surprise them on just how many people really do miss and want these shows back on the air. Shows like Saturday Nightmares was a great place for kids to watch and learn about horror films that were not in the mainstream as well as those were.  While many would say that they can learn about these films via the internet, nothing could take the place of sitting in front of the TV with your favorite snack and watching horrors unfold before your eyes on your TV screen. In fact when I was a kid, I can remember kids talking about some of the films we all had watched on USA Saturday Nightmares and comparing what part we got chills from and what deaths shocked us.  It’s a shame that this kind of enjoyment is taken away from the youth of today.

USA Saturday Nightmares Short Film LogoSaturday Nightmares Haunted Castle

So below are some USA Saturday Nightmares I own on DVD-R, and while no host segments are present, I still will take the film descriptions from IMDB so you can see what types of horrors as I kid I got to witness. And as an added bonus I will also include the horror films from the 80’s and early 90’s that I have that were taped from USA Network. So sit back and relax and welcome to my Saturday Nightmares!

USA Saturday Nightmares curse of the cat people dvd

Saturday Nightmares:  The Curse Of The Cat People
Starring – Simone Simon & Kent Smith      Not Rated      1944

Movie: This mostly unrelated sequel to Cat People (1942) has Amy, the young daughter of Oliver and Alice Reed. Amy is a very imaginative child who has trouble differentiating fantasy from reality, and has no friends her own age as a result. She makes an imaginary friend though, her father’s dead first wife Irena. At about the same time, she befriends Julia Farren, an aging reclusive actress who is alienated from her own daughter Barbara.

USA Saturday Nightmares friday the 13th dvd

Saturday Nightmares:  Friday The 13th
Starring – Betsy Palmer & Adrienne King    Rated R      1980

Movie: One summer at Camp Crystal Lake, a group of young counselors begin to get ready to lead campers. Unfortunately for the former, someone isn’t happy about what’s going on in the camp and enjoys playing kill the counselor. As bodies fall to the ground in the camp, no one is safe.

USA Saturday Nightmares spookies dvd

Saturday Nightmares:  Spookies
Starring – Felix Ward & Dan Scott      Rated R    1986

Movie: Taking a wrong turn, travelers find themselves trapped in a mysterious house. One horror after another threatens them as the sorcerer who lives within needs sacrifices to give eternal life to his beautiful bride.

USA Saturday Nightmares tourist trap dvd

Saturday Nightmares:  Tourist Trap
Starring – Chuck Connors & Tanya Roberts    Rated PG      1979

Movie: A group of young friends stranded at a secluded roadside museum are stalked by the owner of the place, who has the power to control his collection of mannequins.

USA Saturday Nightmares werewolf dvd

Saturday Nightmares:  Werewolf
Starring – Chuck Connors & John J. York      Not Rated      1987

Movie: Young Eric has been bitten by a werewolf. However, he’s not particularly thrilled by this turn of affairs and wishes to escape his curse.

USA Saturday Nightmares shorts dvd

Saturday Nightmares:  The Dummy & Living Dolls
Starring – Carrie Vickrey & Park Dougherty      Not Rated    1982/1980

Movies: The Dummy – A woman is trapped in her apartment alone with a murderous ventriloquist dummy. Living Dolls – Melvin is a henpecked worker in a Bridal shop. To get way from the nagging women, he retreats to a storage room filled with mannequins where he vents his frustration. The only problem is, the mannequins upstairs offer something more horrifying than Melvin expected.

So while your blood is still chilled from all these nightmares, I should also take a moment to highlight some great horror films that aired on USA during the 80’s and early 90’s that I happen to own on DVD-R and VHS, cause I would never get the chance to speak about them any other time that would be as fitting as this update! The main regular none Nightmare or Groovie Movie USA Network airing of a horror film I remember has to be the George Romero zombie epic Day of The Dead.  They did a great job of promoting the premiere, and my brother and I were so hyped to watch it and were not let down after seeing it. I happened to get a copy of an 80’s USA Network airing of Day of the Dead from my pal Jason Young who taped it off TV when he was a kid.  He edited out the commercials but left the amazing intro that showed clips of Night of the Living Dead. So a big thanks goes to Jason for letting me watch the USA Network TV print of my favorite Romero Dead film again. So here are a few of those films that also scared the young viewers at the time of airing.

USA Network Day of the dead dvd

USA Movie:  Day Of The Dead
Starring – Lori Cardille & Joseph Pilato      Rated R      1985

Movie: Zombies rule the world, except for a small group of scientists and military personnel who reside in an underground bunker in Florida. The scientists are using the undead in gruesome experiments, much to the chagrin of the military. Finally the military finds that their men have been used in the scientists’ experiments, and banish the scientists to the caves that house the Living Dead. Unfortunately, the zombies from above ground have made their way into the bunker.

USA Network_childs play 3 dvd

USA Movie:  Child’s Play 3
Starring – Brad Dourif & Justin Whalin      Rated R      1991

Movie: Chucky, the doll possessed by a serial killer, returns for revenge against Andy, the young boy that defeated him and has since become adult.

USA Network_Psycho 3 dvd

USA Movie:  Psycho III
Starring – Anthony Perkins & Jeff Fahey        Rated R      1986

Movie: Norman Bates is still running his little motel, and he has kept the dressed skeleton he calls mother. One of his guests is a young girl who has left the convent where she lived. To get some help he employs a young man. One day a nosy journalist comes to see him to ask questions about his past.

Note From Matt: I was lucky to get this 1995 USA Network Broadcast of Psycho III thanks to my friend Mike Ritchie who taped it off TV during the cool marathon they were having called “Psycho Saturday”. The film is complete with commercials that is highlighted by advertisements for WWF Monday Night Raw, Duckman and Tekwar. I found another tape at his house that had only a small part of Psycho IV taken from the same marathon but it was taped over with WCW Monday Nitro…yeah he has a lot of wrestling tapes.

USA Network Logo

While we are on the subject of USA Network, I should also take a brief moment to talk about a syndicated show they used to air called “Kung-Fu Theatre” because otherwise I never will be able to. The show would feature some really cool martial arts films, many made by The Shaw Brothers exposing viewers to the vast world of Kung-Fu films. The show aired in the early 80’s and disappeared by the mid 80’s and made room for Commander USA as well as all the other movie themed broadcast that followed. One thing I remember that USA did one summer in the early 90’s was called Kung-Fu June where they would play some really cool martial arts films one being called Chinese Super Ninjas, a film I still love to this day. I can remember thinking that this June long fun event would happen every year and was let down when it did not. But as you can see USA Network back then did not just cater to the horror fans they also were delivering action to the Martial Arts fans…those were the days. Below are some screen grabs from Kung-Fu Theatre, so check em out and enjoy.

Kung Fu Theatre 1Kung Fu Theatre LogoKung Fu Theatre 2

I happen to have two episodes of Kung-Fu Theatre from the USA Network thanks to my horror host pal Dr. Pureblood, so why not showcase them a little as well while I have the chance.

kungfu theatre ninja exterminators

Kung-Fu Theatre:  Ninja Exterminators
Starring – Lung Chan & Lung Ching      Not Rated    1980

Movie: A ruthless rapist and jewel thief and his gang are brought to justice by a cop and a young avenger.

kungfu theatre showdown at the equator

Kung-Fu Theatre:  Showdown At The Equator
Starring – Lieh Lo & Nora Miao      Rated R      1978

Movie: An undercover detective uses a restaurant targeted by harassment by a criminal gang to infiltrate the gang and arrest its members.

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USA Saturday Nightmares meant a lot to me growing up, and spending Saturday night watching a cheesy horror film as well as horror related TV shows with my family was what I called a perfect weekend night. Looking back at USA Network as a whole, back then the whole station was iconic to me as I would watch Commander USA’s Groovie Movies, USA Cartoon Express, WWF Monday Night Raw and so many other great programs that all entertained me. If you grew up in the 80’s and 90’s and had cable I am sure you also watched many of these shows, and if you were into horror I am sure you watched Saturday Nightmares and know what I mean about how awesome it was to watch. I should also note that I am looking for more taped off TV Saturday Nightmares movies and if you have some please contact me as I would love to watch them! So as this Horror Host Icon update comes to an end, I think our next update will be based around the world of pro wrestling’s most dominate tag teams and the mini comic series based around them and of course I am talking about The Legion of Doom! So until then make sure to support your local horror host and watch a horror film or two, cause you never know maybe you’ll have your own nightmare.

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The Tender Flesh Of Amber Newman

Imagine you’re invited to a nice hunting getaway by a bunch of rich people who you just have meet.  They treat you super nice and feed you a huge feast the night before the big hunt and give you a nice comfy bed to sleep in. When you wake up the next morning you find yourself the prey as you are the rich snob’s human target! This has been the plot of many Hollywood movies like “Hard Target” with Jean Claude Van Damme and “Surviving The Game” with Ice-T, and it also is the plot of the Jess Franco cheap shot flick Tender Flesh that will be the subject of today’s update! So for this quick update we should learn some survival tactics in order to survive yet another Draculina Photo Comic!

Tender Flesh 0

In 1997, Jess Franco made the film Tender Flesh and this film sparked his shot on video “boom” of releases that were coming out via Sub Rosa and Alternative Cinema on VHS and DVD. The film was written and directed by Jess Franco who also did some of the soundtrack and executive produced. It starred Lina Romay, Amber Newman, Monique Parent and Aldo Sambrell with Newman being the lead. The film’s plot that I don’t want to get too much into on this part of the update and would rather save it for the comic part is about a stripper who is sold by her boyfriend into a game of hunting humans on a remote island. I can remember seeing the film on VHS to rent at places like West Coast Video and K&L Video and never wanting to see it all that much even though it did have Amber Newman in it. Years after it came out, I watched the film on DVD with my pal Jason Gilmore during one of our all night watching movies and playing video games marathons and like most of Franco’s work at this time, we both disliked it, but yet still had fun watching just how cheesy and sleazy it was. The film not only was released on VHS and DVD as a single feature but also as a double feature paired with another Franco flick “Lust For Frankenstein” giving the viewer two low budget sleazy films for the price of one. So if you’re itching to see this film after you read the comic adaptation review you can find it out in the world, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Tender Flesh 01Tender Flesh PosterTender Flesh 02

Tender Flesh stars the queen of softcore porn Monique Parent who was a popular B actress at the time of this film’s release. Her first major role was in the 1991 erotic Cinemax classic “Night Visions,” and from there her career took off as she took roles in such sleazy films as “Sex And The Single Alien”, “Body of Influence”, “Night Eyes 3”, “Sexual Outlaws”, “Stripshow”, “The Key To Sex” and “Black Scorpion”. The role I remember her for is Cassandra in “Mirror, Mirror III: The Voyeur”, while a weak entry in the horror series I still remember her performance. One other really cool thing about Monique is she also was an actress in the full motion video game “Phantasmagoria 2: A Puzzle Of Flesh” as she played Jocilyn Rowan. Monique Parent never broke into hardcore adult films even though her fans wanted her to, and she is still working to this day at the age of 49 as she is to star in the horror film “Axeman 2: OverKill” due out sometime this year. While never one of my favorite sleaze queens, I still respect her work in the b-movie world.

Monique Parent 1Monique Parent 2Monique Parent 3

Another actress that stars in this action erotic thriller is Analia Ivars who was a Spanish actress who did some work before she became one of Franco’s go-to gals when it came to taking her cloths off in his 90’s shot on video stinkers. Her first role with him was Tender Flesh in 1997, and she would go on to show her goods and acting chops in such Franco films as “Mari-Cookie And The Killer Tarantula”, “Lust For Frankenstein”, “Vampire Blues”, “Dr. Wong’s Virtual Hell” and “Helter Skelter” in 2000. After her time with Franco and his One Shot Production Company, she went on to be in a few others films with her latest being “Cenizas Bajo El Mar” that translates to Ashes Under The Sea. A good-looking b-actress who was willing to show it all plus some to help with Francos movie magic is the best way to end this look at Analia.

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Before I torture myself with reading another Franco inspired photo comic from Draculina, I would like to take a look at another film I would love to see turned into a comic series and that’s the 1956 black and white horror film called “The Werewolf” that was directed by Fred S. Sears and stars Steven Ritch as Duncan Marsh, a man lost in a small town (Mountaincrest) during the cold winter with no memory as to who he is thanks to a car wreck, but things are worse for him as he turns into a werewolf and kills a local bully! Now in the snow covered hills in the woods, he hides as the locals come looking for him as does his searching wife and son, but also the two scientists that are the ones who made him into this monster by experimenting on him with wolf’s blood. Will Duncan be saved and returned to his family? Will the Sheriff and his nurse girlfriend be able to find a cure? Or will the scientists kill him before he can tell their secret? The film took a cool twist with the werewolf legend and it’s no longer supernatural, a scientific experiment gone terribly wrong.  This more science driven approach would also be used in the 1957 film, The Vampire. I first saw the film on TNT and taped it on a VHS tape and would watch the film from time to time; it even played on TNT’s Monstervision when it was un-hosted. I really liked the film and the atmosphere of the small mountain town. If this was to be made into a comic book, I would like to see it start from the beginning and act as a prequel to the film, show the evil things the scientist did to Duncan and show how he escaped and his journey to Mountaincrest and all the transformations he had along the way. Duncan as a werewolf could be almost like an antihero much like Eric Cord of Werewolf fame and could in some odd way stop the bad guys while saving the good ones. For instance a young man takes his girlfriend to the drive-in and had very bad intentions after the night’s film, you see he is not who she thinks he is because he ain’t just the local jock he is also a real lady killer! And Duncan stops at the Drive In for a late night hotdog and his Werewolf side ends up saving the young lady from being strangled. Or they could go the opposite and just make Duncan’s werewolf side a killing machine, and show the human sides torment of finding out what his other dark side has done. The comic just needs to end with the car wreck that leaves him with no memory. I would have loved to have seen Dell make this comic, and if I would have it done, I would say Justin Wasson or Jeff Potter would be my picks for sure. Who knows, like the other films I would love comics of made, maybe someday I can get this in a custom comic just for Rotten Ink.

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Well we have arrived at the point on this update where I will be reviewing the comic, and so far we have covered Spanish actress Analia Ivars, softcore queen Monique Parent as well as even a comic I would like to see made based on the ’56 film The Werewolf, so I think I have done well for this quick update! Before we join the hunt, I should tell you rule # 1, that I grade these issues on a star scale of 1 to 4 and am looking for how well the comic stays to the source material, it’s entertainment value and it’s art and story. I want to also thank Ebay for having this in stock and thank Amber Newman for at least giving me something pretty to look at. So to let you readers also know what Sleazy Queen plays what character I will give you a rundown: Newman plays Paula, Romay plays Gorgona, Parent plays Irina and Ivars plays Furia. So get your hunting knife ready and make sure to wear your camos, cause we are on the hunt for some Tender Flesh!

Tender Flesh 1Tender Flesh # 1  * 1/2
Released in 1997     Cover Price $4.95     Draculina     # 1 of 4

Paula is a young American girl who is trying to get a job at a top Spanish strip club and is hired by Mrs. Gorgona Radeck for the job. That night while dancing Paula catches the eye of rich woman Baroness Irina and her husband Kallman who want to pay for a private show that is set up between Radeck and Paul’s boyfriend Carlos that will take place on a paradise island. You see they want Paula to be a sex slave for a weekend and to help on a hunt. Once there they meet a mute woman named Furia who is Gorgona’s servent and does all types of “favors” for the guests, and after a short time the rich folk send Carlos packing and drug Paula and whip her with riding sticks.  The next morning she awakens to find a video message from Gorgona telling her that she has two hours to get to the other side of the island to a speedboat filled with $50,000 dollars! Furia attacks Paula and puts her in a plastic bag and drives her to the middle of the woods and drops her off as Gorgona, Irina and Kallman armed with bows & arrows, knives and a pistol gear up for a human hunt! Paula escapes the plastic bag but is shot with an arrow leaving her wounded.  As Irina comes in for the kill Paula sets her up and slits her throat. Meanwhile Carlos is on his way back to the island after he regrets leaving Paula there knowing that she was to be killed for a game, but he’s too late as Kallman shoots Paula dead with his pistol. Carlos tries to make his way to the money but he himself is killed by Furia! In the end Gorgona, her husband who’s a cook, and Kallman are upset that Paula was shot because the meat is wasted but instead they eat Irina.  You see, they hunt young beautiful woman to eat their tender flesh.

I would have to say that this is one of the better Draculina Photo Comics, but that still doesn’t make it good. The plot is all about hunting a human down like they are a deer so that the hunters can eat what they kill, and it’s also the rich vs. the poor as the villains of this comic clearly think they are above the law. Our hero is Paula a brain dead stripper who takes an offer to be a sex slave for money, but when push comes to shove she tries her best to survive attacks that sadly do leave her dead. Carlos is Paula’s boyfriend and “pimp” and is a total scumbag and I for one was glad when he died.  He was a greedy tool who seemed not to mind seeing his girlfriend dead when he remembered that there was money on a boat. Gorgona, Irina and Kallman are all rich cannibals who are also perverts and weirdly enough only one of them dies, showing that if you’re a millionaire cannibal nothing bad will happen to you. I do love the fact that when Irina dies, she is cooked like a roaste pig and eaten by her husband and friends. The downside of this comic is the fact none of the characters are 100% likable because we get no backstory to any of them to make us care. The photos picked are well selected, and the cover is at least eye catching, but there’s nothing too special here and over all it holds very close to the film by being very forgettable.

Scan 39Tender Flesh Art 2Tender Flesh Art 3

One thing I can say for sure is that I only have one adaptation photo comic left of a Franco cheesy erotic film, and this fact makes me very happy! But our next update comic might be worse then this one because I am digging deep into my past and showcasing one of my early creative works as we take a look at Robo-Raccoon, a comic book series I made when I was a very young lad…so if you can withstand a space adventure with a Raccoon hybrid filled with aliens, monsters, misspelled words and bounty hunters, then you make sure to come back next update! So until then watch a horror film or two, read a comic and support your local Horror Host.

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Matt Goes To The Movies 2014

Matt Goes To The Movies 2014 Logo

2014 was a pretty good year for movies, and while I didn’t get to visit the theater just about every week like last year, I still was able to catch many great films at my favorite theaters. It’s odd that after all these years I still feel the excitement of watching a film in the theater with some popcorn and an Icee. But before we get into my lists, I should say that my favorite theater is Cinemark at the Greene in Beavercreek, but man since they bought the theater from The Rave that place has had some issue and cutbacks that have really taken away from the place. The first thing you will notice is that on many days they are understaffed and many of the faces from last year are no longer working there, although my friend Chris still does so that’s a plus. Plus they did away with the flavor powder to put on your popcorn….so no more cheese popcorn for this movie goer. Others issues I have had is that during John Wick they left the lights on.  When my pal Jeremy Hoyt went and told them they turned off all the lights besides the center one that sadly we were sitting under…I felt like I was being interrogated by Dick Tracy! During November Man almost all the speakers besides the front two didn’t work, and worse, they had the front two cranked and it sounded like crap. During some movies, due to them going all digital with no projectionist when the film would start it would have no sound or no picture. Plus one of the most annoying things is the fact that they cram so many Coka-Cola and Microsoft ads at the start of every movie that it feels like your watching network TV! But to be fair for every bad experience, I have had way more good and that’s why it’s still my favorite theater. So let’s take a seat here at the Rotten Ink Theater lobby and let’s talk films of 2014!

Rotten Ink Cinema Lobby 2014Let’s get those bad films out of the way first, the ones that I left the theater wondering why film or even digital pixels were wasted on making them! So let’s take out this stinky trash before it smells up the joint! This year since I didn’t go and see one or two films a week, I was lucky enough to miss many stinkers but here are at least two that left a fowl smell in the theater.

WORST copy

# 2

300 Rise of an Empire

A direct follow up to 300 takes place at the same time and after the events of the first film, and instead of land battles, it’s mostly all about water warfare. Themistocles and his brave warriors go to war at sea with Xerxes and his evil sister Artemisia all for the glory of Greece. The film has some fun over the top boat battles and even a few sword to sword fights, but many times the action is pure cheese and some of the green screen effects look as if it was a made for the Sy-Fy Channel film. The scene that has Themistocles riding a horse from boat to boat and throwing fire is down right silly and mind numbingly bad. Highlights include a naked Eva Green who plays Artemisia. Over all, it’s a very poor follow up to the original and was a bland sword and sandal film. The film grossed $106,580,051.00 at the US Box Office for Warner Brothers.

# 1

Million Ways To Die In The West

This film just plan sucked! I saw it with my pal Jeremy Hoyt with a theater semi-full of people, and hardly no one laughed and many groans were heard at the poor attempts at humor. The film follows sheep farmer Albert Stark, who is a weak man with no backbone and no shooting skills, that is until he meets Anna, the wife of a gunslinger outlaw who has set his sights on killing Albert who has fallen in love with his wife! It’s up to Anna to help Albert get a backbone and survive not only a fight with her husband but that also with his ex-girlfriend’s mustachioed boyfriend. The film was written, directed and starred Seth McFarlane, who is a one trick pony with his gross and pop culture humor. So in other words, if you think fart jokes are top of the line comedy than Seth wrote this one for you. The film’s only real highlights are cameos from celebrities playing famous characters they have played in past Western films like Christopher Lloyd as Doc Brown from Back To The Future Part III! At the US box office, this film brought in $43,139,300 for Universal. I hope they don’t make a sequel to this film…as the thought makes my brain hurt.

Those were the only bad films I saw in theater, but I should also note that I saw two really bad ones that went direct to video like Wolf Creek 2 and Dario Argento’s Dracula 3-D. But let’s not inhale any more of this stinky trash!

Wolf Creek 2Trash CanArgentos Dracula 3D

Up second, we are going to take a look at action.  While last year we called it 80’s action, this year we are going to add more into it besides films starring aging action stars; plus I am going to add action thrillers into this category. So get your Rambo headband ready because I am about to tell you my top 6 action packed films of 2014!

80s action copy

# 6

sabotage

Arnold Schwarzenegger geared up in this action thriller film that was pretty solid even though it had many plot holes. Breacher is the leader of an elite DEA team.  His wife was murdered by drug lords in Mexico, and he has his team steal money from their busts. When $10 million goes missing from one of their heists, the DEA turns up the heat and disbands the team. But when members of the team are starting to be murdered off, the team must figure out who is killing them and what happened to the money they stole that went missing. The film takes many twists and turns; it also has a solid line up of supporting actors like Joe Manganiello, Terrence Howard and Mireille Enos and some great gun play that all help add to the over all action film feel. The film sadly did very poorly at the box office grossing only $10,508,518.00 in the US for Open House Films, but both Juliet and I enjoyed it.

# 5

The Equalizer

Who doesn’t like seeing Denzel Washington kicking ass and taking names? This action drama follows Robert McCall, a retired black ops agent who is now working at a home improvement store after his wife’s passing. He comes out of retirement and takes on the Russian Mafia when his young friend Alina is beaten badly by her pimp who happens to be a Mafia member.  The bodies pile up as Robert takes the war to the streets and to crime that he witnesses. It’s a fun action flick based on the old 80’s TV show on CBS, that has Robert killing scum bags with all types of weapons from guns to hammers. Denzel is fantastic as is Chloe Grace Moretz who plays Alina.  In fact I think Chloe is an actress to keep an eye on because if Hollywood gives her the roles, she will pull them off. If you want to see scum bags get what they deserve at the hands of a man who knows no fear, then check this one out! The film did pretty well at the US box office and grossed $99,306,000.00 for Sony. I saw this film with pal David J. Getz, who was way too hard on it and took the stand of Denzel being to old to be an action star, and to that I say he’s wrong!

# 4

november man

The November Man is an action thriller that stars former James Bond actor Pierce Brosnan who plays Peter Devereaux, a retired CIA agent who must go head to head with his former protege David Mason when a large plot involving a Russian general and a young female witness to crimes he has committed’s life is in danger. Throw in a hit woman who has been hired to kill her and you have a race to find out the truth and who is the real bad guy! One thing I like about the film is the good guy Devereaux is not a real nice guy as he lies and even hurts innocent people to make things go his way, but with that said he has his reasons and over all he truly is a “good” guy. Pierce Brosnan is fantastic in the role of Devereaux, and that’s what makes this over all average film a heck of a lot better. Sadly this is the movie that when Jeremy and I saw it at the theater, only the front speakers were working and to “fix” it when Jeremy told them, they turned up the front ones louder…doh! The film grossed $25,018,119.00 for Relativity via the US box office.

# 3

John WickThis was the surprise action hit of the year for me as I can safely say that I really enjoyed every bullet riddled moment! Keanu Reeves plays John Wick, a one time enforcer for a crime family who has retired to spend time with his wife who passes away from an illness. After her death, she leaves John a puppy and together they morn the loss. But when the son of the crime lord makes the mistake of stealing John’s car and killing his dog, they awaken “The Boogeyman” who will not stop till the son is dead. What follows next is nonstop action that felt like a video game come to life as bullets and fights break out in clubs and hotels, all ending in deaths! Plus it was funny to see WWF Superstar Kevin Nash in a small role, not to mention the supporting cast was also fantastic with names like William Dafoe, Michael Nyqvist, Alfie Allen, Adrianne Palicki and John Leguizamo all doing great performances for an over the top action film like this. The film did pretty well for Lionsgate at the US box office, grossing in $40,649,000.00 and bringing them in a profit. This is a movie I will buy on DVD when it’s released to show to Juliet and my parents.

# 2

Expendables 3

My favorite action star of all time, Sylvester Stallone, returns as Barney Ross for The Expendables 3.  The film has Barney disbanding his old crew when he finds out that Conrad Stonebanks, an old teammate turned enemy, is still alive when Hale Caesar is injured by him in a raid. Barney turns to his pal Bonaparte to get a younger crew that consist of such actors as Kellan Lutz, Rhonda Rousey, Victor Ortiz and Glen Powell, and when they go after Conrad and fail and become his prisoners, it’s up to Barney and his old crew to save them and stop Conrad once and for all. This film has a paper thin plot but is heavy on the action! It was nice to see Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren, Randy Couture, Terry Crews, Jet Li and Arnold Schwarzenegger all return for a third time. Plus the addition of other classic action stars like Harrison Ford, Mel Gibson, Wesley Snipes and Antonio Banderas (who steals the movie) was a nice way to spice up the cast. The new crew sadly are all forgettable besides Rhonda Rousey, who is a great looking tough UFC chick who can rock a red dress and bash a head in and look fantastic doing it. Not as great as the other two films in the series, but still a solid action flick that sadly did poorly at the US box office for Lionsgate only bringing in $39,322,544.00, but thank God the overseas viewers loved it where it brought in $166,850,000.00! Here is to hoping Sly will give this franchise a break and focus on a new Rambo film…or a sequel to Cobra.

# 1

Walk Among The Tombstones

A Walk Among The Tombstones is a film that mixes many genres together and does so really well; it takes elements from Action, Horror, Thriller and Drama and sprinkles in elements like Noir, Detective and Serial Killer. The film follows former cop now unlicensed private detective Matthew Scudder, who takes a case that involves kidnapping, ransom and murder, and once he’s involved he becomes a player in this sick and twisted game set up by a group of killers. Along the way he meets a young boy on the streets who becomes his somewhat partner and helps him stop the killings and expose the identities of the killers. I really dug this film and enjoyed the fact that it was a Noir Action film that kept me on the edge of my seat.  Plus the film’s killers are true scum of the earth! I saw this film with a pretty packed house and with my friend Jeremy, and you could hear many people talking at the end about how much they liked it. I don’t want to give too much of the plot away, and the story has some surprises that are best left for you to discover when you watch it. The film did pretty bad at the US box office bringing in a total of $26,307,600.00 for Universal on a budget of $28 Million, and that’s a shame cause this film was pretty badass!

Liam beating Sly on my top action films, I would have NEVER seen that coming! So we whooped some ass with action now let’s get our nerd minds a good workout as we take a look at my top four Sci-Fi and Fantasy films! So charge up your Lightsaber and set you phasers to stun, we are talking Science Fiction now.

SciFi

# 4

transformers age of extinction

I hate to say it, but I really enjoyed Transformers: Age Of Extinction in the theater while eating popcorn, drinking a blue Icee with my gal Juliet.  That says a lot for me because I was by no means a fan of the other three films in this series directed by Michael Bay. This one’s plot is simple; the people of Earth have turned on the Autobots and have ruled it open season on killing them and taking the bodies away to be studied to see if we could create ones that would become weapons of war. When the Yeager family find and help Optimus Prime, they become the target of the CIA, and worse, Megatron is back in the form of Galvatron! Can Optimus and the remaining Autobots stop them from ruining the world..well of course they can! The film is packed with stupid robot one liners, wall to wall over the top action and the worst cameos for the Dinobots ever, who only have a few minutes on screen and are a waste of film as they really add nothing to the story. The film scored big for Paramount at the US box office bringing in $245,439,076.00 and when adding in foreign gross, it did over a billion dollars! So if you don’t mind checking your brain in at the door and want to see Mark Wahlberg team up with Optimus Prime, then this Sci-Fi Action film is for you.

# 3

Robocop

I generally dislike remakes of classic films, and when I heard Sony was remaking Robocop, my eyes rolled and I thought here we go again another heartless retelling all for the sake of a quick buck. But after seeing Robocop the week it came out, I must admit I was wrong and I think the people who made this film really tried to capture the feel of the original and update it all at the same time. This time around Alex Murphy is a cop on a mission, and when going after a crime boss he is blown up via a car bomb. OmniCorp, who create robots to fight wars, wants to make a super cop and use Murphy as the test subject and create Robocop! And once he gets revenge on those who originally set him up, he also soon finds that Raymond Sellars, the CEO of OmniCorp, is not a very nice man and wants Robocop shutdown for good when he finds he can’t control his mind and looks at him as nothing more than a computer. Can Robocop stop the evil corporation? Will his wife and son accept him? Will Raymond succeed in pulling the plug? All these questions are answered in this fun PG-13 action romp. Joel Kinnaman plays Robocop/Alex and does a pretty good job, but he is no Peter Weller. The supporting cast is also fantastic with such names as Michael Keaton, Gary Oldman, Samuel L. Jackson and Jackie Earle Haley. The film did weak in the USA box office grossing $58,607,007.00 making the film a miss for Sony. It’s a shame; I would have liked to have seen a part two.

# 2

maleficent

Maleficent was fantastic ,and when seeing it in IMAX 3D, I felt like a kid again watching a Disney take on a fairy tale unfold before my eyes. My favorite animated Disney film has always been Sleeping Beauty so when I heard they were doing a live action film based around the villain Maleficent my interest was peeked. The film follows Maleficent, who is a fairy, and when a human boy misleads her and cuts off her wings to gain power in the nearby kingdom, she turns mean and waits for her revenge on the day the boy is now King and is going to have his first child.  Maleficent places a curse on the child to sleep forever until true loves kiss awakens her on her 16th birthday. But the film takes a twist as we see that Maleficent ends up befriending the young Princess and wants to try and undue the curse but can she do it? And worse the King has sent his whole army to kill her. This family fun flick was amazing and added so much more depth to the Maleficent character.  Plus Angelina Jolie does a top notch job as the “evil” fairy Maleficent. The special effects are top of the line with the fairy moors being breathtaking, as is the dragon that appears to help her in her fight against the army. The film did really well for Disney at the US box office, grossing in $241,381,217.00 and proving that the classic characters never go out of style. If you have not seen this film, you should check it out.

# 1

dawn of planet of the apes

The Planet of the Apes films have always been some of my favorite Sci-Fi films to watch, and these new films being made by Fox are just as great as the originals! This second film in the rebooted series follows Caesar, the leader of the ape population trying to work alongside the remaining humans who have survived a mass sickness that killed off most of the population.  This team up pisses off primate Koba who was abused by man many years back, and he sets a plan in motion where he makes an attempt at Caesar’s life sparking a war with the humans and apes. But can an injured Caesar stop the war or is it too late? The film’s special effects are top notch and throughout the whole movie, you forget that the apes are CGI! Plus with actors like Gary Oldman, Jason Clarke, Keri Russell and Kirk Acevedo playing the humans, you know you’re getting sold acting. My favorite ape in the film has to be Koba; he is so bad yet somehow I think he really thought he was doing good by starting the war and killing any man or ape that got in his way! This was one of the films I was most looking forward to this year, and it was by no means a letdown as I loved every minute of it! The film was a hit for Fox and grossed $208,532,326.00 here in the United States showing that people still love seeing a world run by primates!

I saw a few other films that fit this genre this year that were entertaining but just couldn’t make the cut for this list: “Lucy” starring Scarlett Johansson, a film about a drug that allows a woman to use 100% of her brain after she is used as a mule to smuggle it to the USA when it’s surgically placed into her body.  When the bag leaks she becomes less and less human. “Pompeii” is about the town that was covered in lava and ash via an erupting volcano and follows a gladiator who has fallen in love with a young woman of power, and it turns into a tragic love story starring the likes of Kit Harington, Kiefer Sutherland and Emily Browning. “Legend of Hercules” is about a clean cut son of Zeus who is more of a gladiator than the hero we all know and love. All are entertaining movies in their own right but none were strong enough to make the list.

LucyPompeiilegend of hercules

So let’s trade our phasers in for capes as we now take a look at my top 7 Superhero films of 2014, and man I must say that films based on comics are dominating the box office and shows that comics are more powerful money makers then any company could have ever imagined.

SUPER HERO copy# 7

sin city a dame to kill for

This follow up to Sin City was laced with all the same techniques that wowed audiences upon it’s release in 2005 and even brought back many of the actors from the first film. Sadly it tanked at the box office and put the nail in the coffin for this series. The film follows many stories from Marv, who can’t remember why he killed a bunch of rich brats, to Dwight McCarthy falling for a woman who is using him and many others to get what she wants. There is also a story line of a lucky gambler named Johnny who tests his luck against corrupt Senator Roark and stripper Nancy who wants to kill Roark for crimes he committed in the first film. All the stories come together in the end and all ends well for some, while others end up dead.  The film was a lot of fun and not nearly as bad as many critics would have you think, but as I said it bombed and only did $13,757,804.00 at the box office for Dimension Films. The film also has an all star cast like Josh Brolin, Micky Rourke, Bruce Willis, Eva Green, Joseph Gordon Levitt, Powers Boothe, Rosario Dawson, Christopher Lloyd and Jessica Alba to name a few.

# 6

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

I was very lukewarm on the idea of a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie that was a reboot to the series done by those masters of butchering of childhood memories, Platinum Dunes. But I must say the film was way better than I could ever expect it to be, and while it is flawed with a cheesy script and a Shredder who looks more like he should be in Transformers, the Turtles’ banter is well done even if they look like steroid goofy faced mutants. The film follows the Turtles who are going up against the foot clan who are tormenting New York and even have a plan in motion that will poison and kill many thanks to a gas they will be pumping into the air.  Alongside April O’Neil, the Turtles clash with the foot and their leader The Shredder, and of course along the way we learn about Master Splinter as well as a connection they all have to April. Again the film is flawed, but I enjoyed checking my brain at the door and watching a comic book/cartoon inspired film that tried to keep some of the basics of source material and also tried to add more of an update to it for modern fans. For me I would put it on par with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III and say while bad, it was fun to watch. The film did pretty solid numbers at the US box office for Paramount bringing in $191,204,754.00!

# 5

Hercules

I am pretty sure many people who went to seen Hercules had no idea that it was based on a comic book from Radical Comics and to be honest, much like my cousin Steve Alexander said, this is truly one of the year’s most underrated films. The film stars WWF Superstar Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson as Hercules, a mercenary who alongside his friends are creating the legend of Hercules, the son of Zeus. But when he finds out that he was hired to help the wrong side in a conflict, he and his friends stand against the odds and leave everyone wondering if he truly is the son of a God. The film is filled with great Sword and Sandal action as well as likable characters; this is one film I would have loved to seen sequels made about. The Rock as well does a fantastic job as Hercules and pulls off the role of being maybe a con man yet maybe not, making the character tough when needed and light hearted when the mood is right. The film sadly did not do as well as it should have and grossed only $72,688,614.00 for Paramount at the US box office. With the film being out on DVD and Blu-Ray, do yourself a favor and check it out.

# 4

Amazing Spider-Man 2

I feel like Amazing Spider-Man 2 was judged way too hard by critics and fans who seemed to want to try and nitpick it to death.  I for one really enjoyed it and found it better than the overblown Spider-Man 2 made by Sam Raimi that I think was praised way too much by fans and critics. This time around Spider-Man is locking horns with three super villains who are all gunning to take Spidey down for the count! You have the Rhino, a man in mechanical suit who feels as if he has been wronged by Spider-Man; you have Electro, a man who was a one time Spider-Man fan who after an accident finds that he has the power of electricity; and Green Goblin, who is really his long time friend Harry Osborne who is slipping into madness! And worse as Peter Parker is having issues coming to terms with the death of his girlfriend’s father to whom he made a promise that has him staying away from her. Action, Drama and Spider-Man one liners help make this one a good Super Hero film! Andrew Garfield is fantastic as Spider-Man, and Emma Stone makes one hell of a Gwen Stacy. The strangest casting had to be Paul Giamatti as The Rhino…his performance is down right silly! The film did pretty well for Sony at the US box office grossing in $202,853,933.00 even though they try and act as if it wasn’t a hit for them. I for one am looking forward to Amazing Spider-Man 3 as well as the spin off Sinister Six movie.

# 3

guardians of the galaxy

Guardians Of The Galaxy is the Marvel Comic team that showed the world that you don’t have to be a triple A team to have a hit movie! The film is about Starlord, a goofball outlaw who teams up with other misfits of space like the living tree Groot, talking raccoon Rocket, psycho brute Drax The Destroyer and green skinned female assassin Gamora to protect a infinity stone from getting into the hands of Ronan The Accuser, who is an evil Kree alien who is back stabbing the powerful Thanos in order to collect the jewel and become all powerful. The movie has lots of sci-fi action, drama and comedy and has some of the most likeable characters of any movie this year! Plus I really liked Ronan as a bad guy, and he is a prime example of a cold blooded super villain who will kill whomever gets in his way. When Juliet and I went to see this movie in the theater, it was a pretty packed house and it was clear that everyone in that theater that day had a blast watching it.  The overly positive remarks of people leaving their seats when it was over was a clear sign that Disney and Marvel Studios did something very right. The film did fantastic for Disney at the US box office grossing in an impressive $332,309,276.00 making this a huge hit. If you have not seen this film yet, do yourself a favor and check it out!

# 2

captain america winter

Captain America is one of my favorite Super Hereos of all time and has been ever since I was a kid.  This second film from Disney and Marvel Studios was a fun kick butt action film laced with enough drama to make the film feel very important in the over all movie universe they are creating. This time around Captain America, Black Widow and Nick Fury have became a target by a group controlled by a very high official in America, and they even bring Cap’s old World War II buddy Bucky Barns back from the “dead” and call him Winter Solider, a well trained killing machine. Can Captain America stop this evil group and talk sense into his one time friend? Watch and find out! While the original film was set during World War II, this second film takes place in modern times right after the events of The Avengers and trades in Red Skull for The Winter Solider and does a nice job of making the odds looking against Cap at every twist and turn. I must say Christ Evans makes the perfect Captain America/Steve Rogers and who would have thought that was possible? The film did great for Disney grossing in a massive $259,766,572.00 at the US box office. If your a fan of the star spangled Avenger like myself, make sure to give this film a watch.

# 1

X-Men Days Of The Future Past

The X-Men films, as well as the spin offs like “First Class” and “Wolverine,” are fun comic book action films that make for some amazing popcorn munching theater watches, and “X-Men: Days Of The Future Past” was just that and more as I found it to be my favorite Comic Book film of 2014! I know what those of you who know me are saying, the X-Men beat Captain America? But let me tell you, while Cap was amazing, X-Men was a fun thrill ride filled with some great faces from the franchise’s past. The film follows the future where mutants are being hunted and killed by Sentinels made by Bolivar Trask, and their only hope is to send Wolverine to the past to unite the mutants and stop an event that triggered the mutants’ death sentence. The whole mess is started by the younger Mystique, so can Professor X and Magneto put aside their differences and stop the terrible events to happen in the future…watch and find out. The film is based on one of Marvel Comics’ top story lines for the X-Men and FOX did a fantastic job of making it come alive on the big screen. The film stars all the classic characters from the series rich history with many actors returning such as Patrick Stewart (Professor X), Hugh Jackman (Wolverine), Ian McKellen (Magneto), Halle Berry (Storm), Shawn Ashmore (Ice Man), Daniel Cudmore (Colossus) and Ellen Page (Kitty Pryde) all returning from the first three films as well as actors who played the younger characters in First Class like James McAvoy (Professor X), Michael Fassbender (Magneto), Jennifer Lawrence (Mystique) and Nicholas Hoult as Beast. Not to mention the addition of new characters like Bishop, Quicksilver, Blink, Sunspot and Warpath. I don’t want to ruin the end but let’s just say it feels like a High School Reunion, and all the faces you see are ones that make you smile and feel good about the journey you made to get there. The film did pretty well for Fox at the USA Box Office grossing in $233,921,534.00 and even more overseas! While I like the First Class actors, I am hoping that the next film based on The Age of Apocalypse story will feature more of the originals.

So now that we are retiring the cape, let me talk a little about some cool things Game Swap Kettering did this year for me.  They allowed us to have private screenings of Baron Von Porkchop specials. The first one was near Halloween, and we set up a projector, screen and big speaker as well as a buffet of wings, pizza, chips and cookies. Friends in attendance included Juliet, Stephen Alexander, Maurice, Joe G, Garrison, Todd The Fox and V and we all watched Baron host White Zombie as he tried to enjoy a peaceful Halloween that’s interrupted by an ax murdering zombie named Fulci! They also got a sneak peak at an episode for season three that has Baron hosting the film Face Of The Screaming Werewolf. Then around Thanksgiving we did it again, and they got a sneak peek at the new Baron Von Porkchop Black Friday special where he hosted the Independent B Movie film Razor as well as the First Black Friday special whose film was Farmer Joe. Those specials has his feud with a Chicken Man he made that has become a thorn in the Baron’s side. But a big thank you goes to Game Swap in Kettering for allowing us to do these fun screenings. Whenever I get a bigger place to live with a basement I would love to start a Horror Host Fan Club that has meetings once every two months and we project and watch host shows…who knows maybe 2015 will be that year! Below is a cellphone pic from the Halloween episode screening.

Baron Von Porkchop Screening

So while doing a rundown of the films of 2014, I figured I would take a brief moment to give you my top three best Survival Horror Games of 2014 as well as the worst, because those of you who know me understand that I love to play a good solid Survival Horror game! Now I need to state that of the “modern” game systems, I have a PS3 and will soon get a PS4 so all games on the list are ones I got for PS3. I also want to say that the games I buy are on physical disc, and I do not download games so while many horror themed games did come out as digital only games, I have not played them and won’t unless a disc is released.  I like to own what I pay for. So let’s start off with what I found to be the worst of the horror games that came out in 2014 that I have played. And I won’t ramble much I promise…okay, maybe a little rambling.

Worst Horror Video Games

# 1

Escape Dead Island PS3

Escape Dead Island is one of those games that just reeks of a quick cash in with boring fighting mechanics as well as a storyline that is a little weak. This game follows Cliff, a party boy who wants to get his dad’s respect so he goes to the island of a zombie outbreak along with his friends Linda and Devan and finds out that the stories are true and zombies are running wild on the island! Along the way he also meets Xian, a woman who is looking for her friend Rob who went missing while getting intel on the corporation responsible for the outbreak. While the other two games in the series “Dead Island” and “Dead Island Riptide” are first person shooters, this game changed to a third person game.  In the two games that came before you could customize your weapons multiple ways, and in this game your weapons are very limited and barely upgradeable. Plus I can’t help but notice the style of animation is clearly trying to rip off Tell Tale Games’s style with the more cartoonish look. Over all this is not a bottom of the barrel game, but it’s close.

So now that I spoke about the “worst” Horror Game this year that I would more label at “weakest,” let’s move onto what I considered the three best games that helped make 2014 a pretty good year for horror themed games!

Best Horror Video Games Logo

# 3

Alien Isolation PS3

After the complete mess that was “Aliens: Colonial Marians,” Sega redeemed themselves with this fun moody game that allows the player to take control of Amanda Ripley, the daughter of Ellen who travels to a space station that has been sending out distress signals.  Once she gets there, things go wrong as she is separated from her small crew and finds that Xenomorphs are on the prowl and hungry for a human host! The game stacks the odds against you, and the player must use their wits in order to survive this terror in space. The downside to the game is that I felt it took forever for the story to really kick in and that slowed the scares from coming in. The game is a first person shooter and plays much like Call of Duty and so many other shooters like this. I must also say that some of the cut scene graphics are really ugly on PS3, and it’s clear that the development team spent more time on the newer generation consoles versions. A major plus for this game comes via DLC that allows you to play as Ellen and has many of the original characters from the first film like Dallas and Ash back, and they are voiced by the actors who played them in the film! While not a perfect game, it was a fun game that helped make 2014 in gaming a little spookier!

# 2

The Walking Dead Season Two PS3

The Walking Dead Season Two is a great follow up to Season One and helps add more to the story it created. This is a point and click adventure game made by one of the best independent game companies, Tell Tale Games, who have made some of my top favorite games of the past 4 years and this game adds another hit to the list. This time around we follow Clementine (who was a major character in the first game), a young girl who is trying to survive this zombie outbreak.  Along the way she meets people and she loses people all of whom are running from Carver, a man that use to lead them in a group.  All comes to a head when she meets Carver herself, a jerk of a man who runs a camp that is held up in a home improvement center and who takes Clem and her friends hostage and makes them work for the group’s needs putting them in danger. Your choices impact the story so when playing make sure to choose wisely. One cool aspect of this game is some returning faces from the first game as well as references to choices you made. The downside is the new characters seem to have less development then those from the original and the settings are a little less impactful as in the first game I truly felt like I could be zombie food at any moment. But with that said, this is a great game and one hell of a fun play.  So if you liked the first or just want to play a fun story driven point and click adventure horror game, then this one is for you.

# 1

The Evil Within PS3Take video games Resident Evil, Silent Hill and Clock Tower and mix them with Horror films like As Above So Below, and you have the new Survival Horror Game by Shinji Mikami, the mastermind behind the original Resident Evil series as well as Dino Crisis! This game is about Sebastian Castellanos, a detective who along with his partners Juli and Joseph, go to a distress call at the Beacon Mental Hospital.  When they get there, everything is in chaos and the world as they know it has changed and infected people and monsters are wandering the world above as well as below. Can Sebastion get to the bottom of what’s going on as well as unearth the truth of why and who is responsible! The game is packed with great atmosphere and at all times I feel as if the odds are against me as ammo comes in only ones and twos and most the time it’s better to run than to fight. So if you’re not too scared, get this game and beware of Safehead!

It was very hard to pick between Evil Within and The Walking Dead Season Two for the # 1 spot as both are solid and super fun games, but in the end I had to go with Evil Within as I felt that it truly captured what a Survival Horror Game is all about and at all times I felt as if the odds of survival were against me. One game that came out that while I bought I have not played yet is Castlevania: Lords Of Shadow 2, so who knows where it would have placed.

Castlevania Lords Of Shadow 2 PS3

So we talked a little about screenings of Horror Host Baron Von Porkchop as well as Survival Horror Video Games, now let’s get to the bloody meat of this update and take a look at the Horror Films of Hollywood!

horror copy

# 11

Tusk

Tusk was so close to being on my worst films of the year list as once more Kevin Smith smoked a bunch of pot and unleashed another over the top film onto the small masses who still watch his films. But then I read some interviews with Smith and he explained that he wanted to make this film because he wanted to and not for a studio or for quick cash.  I began to see that the film is labor of love much like the film The Wolf Hunter is to Matt Hoffman. It’s about a podcast host who travels to Canada for an interview with a kid who is a Youtube sensation after cutting off his own leg with a samurai sword.  When he gets there, he finds the kid has committed suicide, and he then travels to an old mansion to talk to an old man who has a story to tell or so the letter left in a mens room says. The rest of this film has the old man turning the podcaster into a human walrus as his co-host and his girlfriend try to find and save him.  Oh yeah and throw in a dimwitted investigator, and you have the film. When the podcaster is turned into full Walrus, I laughed out loud in the theater and thought to myself what and why am I watching this! I should also note that Juliet and I were the only people at the theater watching this film at the time. It stars Justin Long, Johnny Depp, Haley Joel Osment and Michael Parks and all do fantastic with the silly parts they are given. Again when you see Long, who plays the podcaster, as a walrus you can’t help but to laugh as he swims and grunts around. The film did poorly for A24 and only grossed $1,826,705.00 and didn’t even get a foreign release. If you are to watch this cheesy thriller/comedy horror film check your brain at the door and be prepared for long goofy dialogue and unlikable characters.

# 10

the pyramid

Hollywood horror films are lacking mummies, and when The Pyramid was announced I was hyped believing that we got a mummy film in 2014…I was sadly wrong. I first need to say that I was hyped to see this film and was ready for a creepy Egyptian found footage film taking place in an old pyramid where the viewer was not sure what was stalking our characters.  So when this film was a disappointment, I think it’s because of my own hype I made for it. The hype I made for it was the fact it was the last theatrical horror film of the year and again the setting and the possibility of it being about a Mummy. The film is about a father and daughter team as well as her boyfriend being followed by a documentary crew who are in Egypt during stressful times who find a pyramid that could be the oldest one ever found.  When they are told to leave due to the outbreak of civil uprising, they send in a robot real quick to get a sneak peek and when the bot looses contact, they go in to retrieve it and soon find the pyramid was a place to keep something in and not things out! One by one, they fall victim to the hunter who is a jackal headed god who has been placed there because it went mad after the death of its father. Can any of them survive and can they also dodge the evil cats that are roaming around…yeah the film has evil cats. The characters all seem brain dead with the cameraman and father being the worst two.  The CGI for the cats and jackal god are downright eye rolling, and the film was just kind of boring.  I was not the only one who felt this as Juliet and several others in the theater also expressed these feelings. The film was pulled from wide release to limited, and we had to see it at the Regal Cinema in Beavercreek.  Doing this made the film only gross a small $ 2,638,300.00 for FOX at the US box office. No Mummy but a heck of a lot of CGI Cats is what I got in The Pyramid.

# 9

Ouija

Ouija is a film based on the Hasbro board game and produced by those masters of crap Platinum Dunes.  It’s your typical paint by number ghost story. When a young woman commits suicide, her friends don’t believe it and soon find that she was messing with a Ouija Board on her own and had unleashed something terrible, but they only learn this after they themselves use the board to try and speak to her. Now the evil is after them, can they find the answers on how to stop the spirit or will they all become victims? No major gore, some cool spirit effects, some good creepy shots, pretty actresses, released at Halloween time and a fun film to torment my friend Jeremy with as he had to be dragged to this film kicking and screaming! The film did $50,856,010.00 for Universal and is clearly a teen PG-13 horror film that was nothing special and not fully terrible.

# 8

The Quiet Ones

The Quiet Ones is a Hammer Horror Film that follows a camera man who takes the job of documenting a college professor who, along with his helpers, are trying to cure a sick and possessed young woman named Jane whom they have locked in a room and wont allow her to sleep for any long period of time as well as keep her human interaction to a minimum. But when her treatments become more and more cruel, the camera man must come to a decision on whether to help Jane escape who he has fallen for or stay true to his assignment as the Professor thinks she can be cured. So is she possessed or being abused…watch and find out. The film is a little slow and while well acted for the most part, many decisions characters make are annoying and add to frustration as a viewer. Olivia Cooke plays Jane, the sick girl, and she is fantastic and probably the best actor in the film. I saw the film with Stephen, Garrison, Todd and Josh, and all of us felt the same way about it and that’s it was okay but way too slow and a little too long as a good 15 minutes could easily be cut out of the 1 Hour 38 minute run time. The film at the US box office brought in $8,509.867.00 for Lionsgate.  All I can say was much like Ouija, it was just okay.

# 7

deliver us from evil

A group of soldiers from Iraq have come back and are acting very aggressive and all have strange behavior. New York cop Ralph Sarchie is called in to investigate the crimes and soon learns the truth that demons are real and want to teach him a lesson for butting into their plans. Along with a Castilian priest, he must find faith and save the souls of the infected as well as save his wife who has been kidnapped by the possessed. It also shows that Sarchie is gifted and can spot evil. The film is said to be based on a real case and the real life of Sarchie. The film stars Eric Bana as Sarchie as well as the likes of Olivua Munn, Sean Harris and Edgar Ramirez with music by Christopher Young. The film was nothing special and for the most part is a run of the mill possession film with no surprises and a few gross moments. I watched the film with Jeremy and watching him go crazy with the overly religious tone of the movie made me laugh. The film didn’t do so hot at the box office only grossing in $30,577,122.00 for Sony on a 30 million dollar budget in the US. Not much more to say about this one, besides if you’ve seen one modern possession movie, ya pretty much have seen em all.  It’s not bad and has some good creepy moments – worth a watch to fans of this horror film topic boom.

# 6

Godzilla

I have been a fan of Godzilla since I was a kid and can remember watching the films all the time on TBS on Super Scary Saturday hosted by Grandpa Munster. But when Godzilla is made by Americans, it tends to not be so good; I mean just look at the over blown 1998 film that Hollywood spewed out to the fans that seemed like it was made more to sell toys and Taco Bell Cups than to entertain the movie goers. So when Warner Brothers said they were releasing a Godzilla film, I was stand offish even though in the back of my mind I was scream YES, a new Godzilla film on the big screen,  The more time passed and after seeing the trailer I became very hyped to watch it! The film has an accident that happens at a power planet in Japan that’s caused by a giant monster who is looking for its mate and when it wakes up it causes havoc and destruction.  As this is going on a US Solider is trying to get home to his family, and Godzilla has come from the sea and is on a path to clash with the other two monsters. You see Godzilla is acting as Earth’s protector! The human parts are what they always are in my opinion in giant monster films, and that’s filler. The major flaw I had with the film is more time is spent on the boring solider trying to get home and less on Godzilla who is why we all went to see this film in the theater. I must also say the shaky camera and pull away shots of the early monster fights was annoying and didn’t add suspense for me as much as it added frustration. Even with those small flaws I really enjoyed the film for the most part and am looking forward to part two as well as the announced Japanese Godzilla film in the works. The film did great for WB at the US box office bringing in a whooping $200,676,069.00, making it a hit for them this year.

# 5

i frankenstein

Frankenstein’s Monster was back on the silver screen this year with an Action Horror film called I, Frankenstein that followed The Monster who was a pawn in a war between Heaven and Hell who need him to find the secrets of life created by man and not God. The good side is gargoyles who at first want to protect or kill The Monster, and the Demons who are working for evil and they want him to study and make soulless husks so demons straight from hell can take over the bodies of the newly made soulless bodies. But what none of them counted on is that The Monster is a fighter, and he will be pawn to no man or creature! The film has a real Underworld feel to it, and the action is fun and over the top, plus for the most part is well acted. I think this film is pretty underrated and was judged way too much just by the trailer, the fact it’s PG-13 and that Aaron Eckhart plays The Monster. The film did terrible at the US box office and only grossed $19,075,290.00 for Lionsgate on a $65 Million Dollar budget, and it’s a shame as it’s not at all that bad of a film.

# 4

As Above So Below

As Above So Below is a “found footage” style film that follows Scarlett, an alchemy scholar who wants to find the famed philosopher’s stone that is said to be able to heal the sick and dying among other amazing things. She follows clues and finds that the entrance to achieving her goal is inside the catacombs below Paris, and along with her camera man and friend they hire some local urban explorers and find that this quest is more then they bargained for as they face sins of their past and find the gateway to Hell. This film was packed with some solid acting and atmosphere that was downright spooky and well done unlike The Pyramid that had a very similar type of feel. All the characters are likable and while they do make some dumb decisions, I still found myself hoping they all make it out okay. The film is by no means a bloodbath but what it lacks in the red stuff, it makes up for with heart and mood. I saw this film with Juliet, Todd The Fox and V, and we all left the theater thinking the film worked and was okay. Universal released this film and at the US box office it grossed in $21,321,100.00 on a $5 million budget. If you are a fan of the found footage horror genre then make sure to check this one out, oh yeah liked this one so much even bought the DVD when it was released.

# 3

The Purge Anarchy

The first Purge film was my # 9 horror film of 2013 out of thirteen and while I enjoyed it, I found it lost among many other solid horror pictures. The sequel The Purge: Anarchy in my opinion is a way better film and that’s why it’s locked itself as the 3rd best Horror film I saw in theaters in 2014! The film follows a man named Leo who is going out to purge a man who killed his son in a drinking and driving accident, but he gets side tracked from his task when he saves a mother and daughter as well as a young couple all of whom are being targeted by what seems like a government elite team hired to reduce the population not to mention a rag tag bunch of mask and makeup wearing youngsters who have set their eyes on them as well. Leo does his best to keep them all alive as well as get to his goal. The film is filled with surprises as well as a positive message in the end and that’s why I think I enjoyed it so much.  It was not your typical modern downbeat horror flick. The film is also well acted with actors like Frank Grillo, Cameron Ejogo and Zach Gilford. The film did great for Universal at the box office here in America grossing in $71,962,800.00 and making it that a part 3 is in the works. More action and suspense then the original and a solid good sequel, check it out if you liked the first one. I saw it with Juliet who also really liked it!

# 2

anabelle

The Conjuring was my # 1 Horror film of 2013, and this off shoot titled Annabelle is my # 2 for 2014 showing you that the makers of this film series are doing something right. It’s the 1960’s and satanic cults are all the rage, and a young couple is attacked in their home by cult members that leave the would be attackers dead.  When the female attacker dies in the baby’s room holding the Annabelle doll the odd events start happening. It gets so bad that something seems to be trying to hurt the woman and her unborn baby, even at one point setting the house on fire! After the baby is born, they move and find that whatever it is followed as the doll the cult woman held when dying is possessed by a demon who wants to take a soul real bad! Can they get rid of the demon before it’s too late? The Annabelle doll is the same one used to open The Conjuring and is over all creepy looking.  That’s one thing I really liked about the film, the longer it went on, the more sinister looking the doll became. And while the doll is never seen moving on its own, the dead eyed stare of its porcelain face is what terrified the audience. The demon who is the real baddie of the film is not seen too much, but when he is, it’s effective. This is supposed to be based on a true story and is a nice appetizer for the next Conjuring film that should be out in 2016. The film did well for New Line Cinema at the US box office bringing in $84,273,813.00 making it a hit for them. For some reason the film also seemed to get a lot of hate from Horror fans, but most of the ones I knew who trashed it, I question their taste anyway as they go to see Seth Rogen movies! I saw the film with Juliet, who loved it.

# 1

Dracula Untold

Universal is trying to breath new life into their classic Monsters, and the first on the list was Dracula.  This film, Dracula Untold, is about how Prince Vlad became a vampire! I was really hyped for this film that was set to release in October…yeah finally Hollywood gets that Horror Films and Halloween go hand and hand. The film follows Prince Vlad whose people are being bullied by the Turks and the sultan who want all the male kids to be given to them to become soldiers in the large Turkish army. So Vlad makes a deal with a Vampire that lives in a cave to gain powers to stop the Turks.  By doing so, he is putting his own soul at risk, but he gains the powers to single handedly kick the butt of his enemies. But when things go wrong Vlad goes full vampire, and once he does that, there is no going back. This film is filled with horror and a heck of a lot of action and is really well done. Luke Evans plays Dracula and does so with grace and it’s the first time that I can remember that you find yourself cheering for Dracula as he is not the bad guy and only takes the curse to save his son as well as the sons of all his people. I saw this with Juliet and Jeremy Hoyt, and both of them really enjoyed it as well did all the others in the IMAX Theater as praises were being said as people left. This film ends as well with a lead up to a sequel or to link to another Universal Monster film, and this makes this Monster Kid happy. The film did okay for Universal at the US box office bringing in $55,991,880.00 and did more overseas. If you like your horror mixed with action and enjoy classic monsters, then check this one out, because I really enjoyed it locking it in as my # 1 Horror Film of 2014.

2014 in Horror Films was filled with lots of ghost/possession films, and I have a feeling this trend will continue for awhile as they seem to be films that can be cheaply made and return a big profit. While sitting in the theater this year the two films that I noticed seem to have the audience in it’s grip were Annabelle, that had a few people gasp and jump when the evil things would happen on the silver screen, and As Above So Below where the audience had an eerie hush as the characters went deeper into the catacombs. Ouija had the worse response as people laughed at many of the scares and many of the younger people in the audience seemed to be having a fun time teasing the young ladies with them. 2014 was an okay year for Horror in the theaters, and I for one am looking forward to seeing what 2015 has in store to send shivers up my spine. Well the next update is something terrifying as we take a look at another Draculina Photo Comic based on a film of Jess Franco called Tender Flesh! So until then, support your local theaters, read a comic or two and always support your local Horror Host and see you next update.

Tender_flesh_(1998) logo

DC At The Movies: Batman (The Christmas Eve Special)

Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas Eve.  While this has been a year filled with lots of ups and downs for me, I have also had a great time loving life and am happy for all my friends and family in my life who have helped make me the person that I am today! While last year we covered Thundercats, this year we are going to cover something a little different as we will be looking at the movie series Batman that started with the Tim Burton directed film in 1989.  When that movie came to theaters on June 23rd the following Christmas every male kid I knew wanted Batman stuff for presents, and boy was their a lot to choose from! On this update we are going to cover the DC Comic Movie Adaptations of the Batman films so let’s sit back with some eggnog and wait for Santa to come down the chimney and talk DC At The Movies: Batman!

Batman 1989 Symbol

When I was a kid, the most popular superhero films were the Superman films starring Christopher Reeves as Superman/Clark Kent.  The only other DC heroes I could think of that had their own movies were Swamp Thing in 1982 and Batman had a film based off the 60’s TV show in 1966.  They did also have some great TV shows like previously mentioned Batman as well as Shazam, Wonder Woman, Legend of Isis and of course Adventures of Superman. Marvel at the time was mostly just focusing on TV with shows and made for TV Movies based on Incredible Hulk, Spider-Man, Captain America and Doctor Strange and did have the bomb Howard The Duck in 1986 a cheesy film directed by George Lucas, but I must say as a kid I really liked the film Howard the Duck.  I guess very loosely you could say that the Conan films as well as Red Sonja were a sliver connected to Marvel who made comics based on those characters at the time. But when 1989 came around, and Tim Burton, director of Pee Wee’s Big Adventure, made Batman, the youth at the time exploded and Batmania was born! You couldn’t turn on the TV without hearing something about this film, and most kids at school had Batman t-shirts, folders, backpacks and toys. If your grew up when the 1989 film and its sequels came out, then you know what I am talking about when I say Batman ruled the world for those months leading up to the releases and the months that followed. So before we get too much into the insane popularity and merchandise of Batman I should give you a crash course on the films, and of course I will be getting the help of IMDB for these write ups as I would be far too long winded to tell you the readers the plots. So let’s set the bat signal off and see what these films were all about! Oh I will also put on here who played Batman as well as who played the main villain in each of these films.

Batman (Keaton)Batman 1989 PosterThe Joker (Jack)

BATMAN (1989)

Gotham City: dark, dangerous, ‘protected’ only by a mostly corrupt police department. Despite the best efforts of D.A. Harvey Dent and police commissioner Jim Gordon, the city becomes increasingly unsafe…until a Dark Knight arises. We all know criminals are a superstitious, cowardly lot…so his disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts. He becomes a bat. Enter Vicky Vale, a prize-winning photo journalist who wants to uncover the secret of the mysterious “bat-man”. And enter Jack Napier, one-time enforcer for Boss Grissom, horribly disfigured after a firefight in a chemical factory…who, devoid of the last vestiges of sanity, seizes control of Gotham’s underworld as the psychotic, unpredictable Clown Prince of Crime…the Joker. Gotham’s only hope, it seems, lies in this dark, brooding vigilante. And just how does billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne fit into all of this?

Batman – Michael Keaton

Joker – Jack Nicholson

Bob The Goon – Tracey Walter

Batman (Keaton 2)Batman Returns PosterThe Penguin (Danny)Catwoman (Michelle)

Batman Returns (1992)

Having defeated the Joker, Batman now faces the Penguin – a warped and deformed individual who is intent on being accepted into Gotham society. Crooked businessman Max Schreck is coerced into helping him become Mayor of Gotham and they both attempt to expose Batman in a different light. Earlier however, Selina Kyle, Max’s secretary, is thrown from the top of a building and is transformed into Catwoman – a mysterious figure who has the same personality disorder as Batman. Batman must attempt to clear his name, all the time deciding just what must be done with the Catwoman.

Batman – Michael Keaton

Penguin – Danny DeVito

Catwoman – Michelle Pfeiffer

Batman and Robin (Val & Chris)Batman Forever PosterThe Riddler (Jim)Two Face (Jones)

Batman Forever (1995)

The Dark Knight of Gotham City confronts a dastardly duo: Two-Face and the Riddler. Formerly District Attorney Harvey Dent, Two-Face incorrectly believes Batman caused the courtroom accident which left him disfigured on one side; he has unleashed a reign of terror on the good people of Gotham. Edward Nygma, computer-genius and former employee of millionaire Bruce Wayne, is out to get the philanthropist; as The Riddler he perfects a device for draining information from all the brains in Gotham, including Bruce Wayne’s knowledge of his other identity. Batman/Wayne is/are the love focus of Dr. Chase Meridan. Former circus acrobat Dick Grayson, his family killed by Two-Face, becomes Wayne’s ward and Batman’s new partner Robin the Boy Wonder.

Batman – Val Kilmer

Robin – Chris O’ Donnell

The Riddler – Jim Carrey

Two Face – Tommy Lee Jones

Batman Robin Batgirl (movie cast)Batman & Robin PosterFreeze Ivy Bane (movie cast)

Batman & Robin (1997)

Batman and Robin are back working side-by-side to stop the villains of Gotham City, but is there tension appearing between them, especially when one villainess who calls herself Poison Ivy can make anyone fall in love with her…literally. Along with Poison Ivy, the icy Mr. Freeze is freezing anything which gets in his way from achieving his goal.

Batman – George Clooney

Robin – Chris O’ Donnell

Batgirl – Alicia Silverstone

Mr. Freeze – Arnold Schwarzenegger

Poison Ivy – Uma Thurman

Bane – Jeep Swenson

The first two films were directed by Tim Burton and have a brooding dark feel to them while the latter two were directed by Joel Schumacher and take a more neon and goofy approach. Say what you will about any of them, you cannot deny the impact they had on the youth at the time as well as the box office. If you look at 1989, Batman was the # 1 film of the year bringing in $251,188,924.00 beating out the likes of Lethal Weapon 2, Back To The Future Part II, Ghostbusters II, The Little Mermaid, Honey I Shrunk The Kids, Star Trek V: The Final Frontier, Born on the Fourth of July, National Lampoons Christmas Vacation, Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure, Karate Kid Part III, 007: License To Kill, A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child, Friday The 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan, Halloween 5, All Dogs Go To Heaven, No Holds Barred, Cyborg, Kickboxer, Police Academy 6: City Under Siege, The Burbs, Major League, Tango & Cash as well as Indiana Jones And The Last Crusade! So as you can see it had very stiff competition and ended up beating them all. Batman Returns took the # 3 spot in 1992 beating out Wayne’s World, Lethal Weapon 3, Hellraiser III, A Few Good Men and Alien 3 to name a few! While in 1995, Batman Forever took # 2 and beat out such films as Pocahontas, 007: Goldeneye, Seven, Braveheart, Halloween 6: The Curse Of Michael Myers and Billy Madison. Batman & Robin took # 12 in 1997 and beat Scream 2, Austin Powers, Cop Land, Jackie Brown, Wishmaster, An American Werewolf in Paris, Lost Highway, Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation and Alien Resurrection. But one thing I want to point out, is does anyone else notice that in every Batman movie in this series Bruce Wayne has a new love interest and almost always shows them that he is Batman! I think if I was Bruce Wayne, and while all the ladies are very lovely, I would try to stay with Chase Meridian played by Nicole Kidman as she is smart and very good looking! But no mater how you slice it, Wayne knows how to pick the ladies!

Kim BasingerBatmans RŸckkehrNicole Kidmanelle macpherson

The first batch of action figures based on the Batman movie was made by Toy Biz and showcased not only Batman but also The Joker and Bob The Goon. While many kids like myself rushed to get these figures to have our own Batman Movie style adventures, the figures themselves looked terrible and nothing like the actors from the film. I can remember many kids bringing these figures to the playground, and while we were happy to have them, we still all knew that the figures just looked cheap and were shells of what they should be. I had Batman and The Joker and skipped Bob The Goon, The Joker’s action was a squirting flower that acted like a squirt gun while Batman’s was his belt could be used as a hook. While Toy Biz tried, they really did fail, and the license was quickly taken away and given to Kenner.

Toy Biz Batman ToyToy Biz The Joker ToyToy Biz Bob The Goon Toy

When toy company Kenner got the license to make Batman movie toys, they went for the kill and made figures that looked like the actors as well as accessories like the Batmobile, The Batcopter and the Batcave. They also stayed with the film series and made figures for Batman Returns, Forever and Robin! Each series focused on many different versions of Batman and did all the core bad guys from the movie. On some of the molds they reused ones from their old Super Powers line as The Penguin is the same figure just his suit is painted a different color. When Kenner put these out I had to get my hands on one of the Batman’s as well as Catwoman, and they quickly replaced the Toy Biz ones when it came to Toy Wars. One thing that always cracked me up is the Poison Ivy figure done for the Batman & Robin line looks nothing like Uma Thurman who would not give them permission to use her likeness and looks like a man in drag instead! Don’t believe me, just take a look below, as well as take a look at some more of the Kenner Batman figures!

Kenner Batman ToysKenner ivy & Freeze

Back in 1989 Taco Bell released collector cups featuring Batman, and these were something that I felt I had to have when I was a kid and begged my parents to take me to Taco Bell to get one! When I did get one I can remember drinking everything from Mountain Dew to Chocolate Milk out of it, and it lasted away! After so many washings, the image on the cup began to disappear and sadly the Batman cup was retired and sold in a garage sale. I also remember them doing the cups for Batman & Robin, and I also collected those and got the whole set. McDonald’s did cups for Batman Returns, but I never did get any of those.

Taco Bell Batman Cups

McDonald’s had some Happy Meal toys as well as other merchandise for Batman Returns when the film was released, and many kids I knew had the cars that came in the meal. I can remember having Batman but none of the others. My cousins Dino and Norman had them all and so did Nathan. During this time, they also had pen necklaces that had Batman, Catwoman, Batmobile and The Penguin as topper caps on a very cheap pen. McDonald’s took some heat for putting out these toys in their kids meals by parent groups who thought the film was too violent and should not be geared towards the youth.  Parents groups sure can be silly sometimes.

McDonalds Batman Returns Happy Meal BagMcdonalds Batman Returns ToysBatman Returns Neck Pens

Trading cards have been made for all the films, but none were as popular as those based on the 1989 film put out by Topps. I used to get packs of the cards at United Dairy Farmers as well as at Big Bear and would trade my extra cards and stickers to my neighbor Carmen Fields who was making a whole set. The cards were well done, and they did two sets based just on the first film! I used to love buying old wax packs of cards and chewing on the stale gum as I flipped through to see what cards I had gotten. Oh the good old days!  But while the cards were cool, the whole set doesn’t sell for much as on Ebay.  They go for about $14.00 for both 1 and 2.

Topps Batman CardsTopps Batman Cards 2Batman Returns Cards

Batman t-shirts was also all the rage when I was younger, and while I didn’t have any for the first film I did have some for Batman Returns and as of the last few years I do have a Mr. Freeze one from Batman & Robin thanks to my brother Bryan who found it at a thrift store. I can remember that when I got my Batman Returns shirt for school I felt really cool with my all over print shirt Batman design and wore that shirt for many years after, mostly for gym or to sleep in. Sadly the shirt got holes in it and went to the big washing machine in the sky. But I am sure many of you reading this remember just how important it was for you to have the right cool shirts or shoes to fit in, I however was always just me and would wear movie and band shirts way past there popularity like my old blue Alice Cooper shirt or even Flattop from Dick Tracy. But while my old Batman shirts are gone or way too small at this point, I still have great memories of wearing them and being me.

Batman Returns T Shirt 1Batman Returns T Shirt 2Joker T-Shirt

Do you remember when companies like Post and Quaker Oats made cereals based on all types of cartoons and movies like The Addams Family and Gremlins? Well of course Batman cereal had to be made and company Ralston was the one to deliver it to the masses. Every morning when I was a kid my Mom made sure we ate some breakfast, and while some times it would be eggs & toast or oatmeal, it was mostly cereal and Batman was one that we tried and kind of liked. I can remember the main reason I choose it from the shelves of Big Bear is because it came with a free bank shrink-wrapped to the box. While the original Batman cereal was pretty good, the Batman Returns one made as well by Ralston was not so much! I can also remember eating Batman cereal watching Saturday Morning Cartoons.  Man I really do hate that in October 2014 Saturday Morning Cartoons ended on all major stations, ending an era.

batman cerealBatman Returns cereal

What would a movie be without a video game tie in back in the 80’s and 90’s and of course Batman had a number of game come out based on the blockbuster flicks. First Batman: The Video Game for NES came out in 1990 by SunSoft, and this game was super popular with the Brassfield cousins as we would all try and beat it while at our Grandparents house or even at each others. This game was followed up by Batman: Return Of The Joker, a follow up to a movie game that has no ties to any Batman movies by SunSoft for the NES and Sega Genesis in 1991 and 1992. When Batman Returns was released, a video game was made for many home consoles like NES, SNES, Sega Genesis, Sega CD and even Sega Master System. Batman Forever, a very cheesy beat em up game, came out for Sega Genesis and SNES while Batman Forever The Arcade Game was made for Arcades, Playstation and Sega Saturn. Batman & Robin also got the video game treatment as a game was released for Playstation, and I can remember getting this game from Blockbuster Video and trying my hardest to beat it…I never did and I blame it on the poor controls. While they all have a charm in their own way Batman: The Video Game for NES remains the best video game based on this series.

Batman NesBatman Returns GenesisBatman Forever GenesisBatman & Robin PSX

When Batman and Batman Returns came out in theaters I did not get to see them as we had to wait for the VHS tapes for hit the library and local video rental store.  My Dad was not a fan of the 1989 film when he watched it and didn’t want to spend money on the second one. But I can remember me and my brother trying to get them to take us but it didn’t work. Well for my 15th birthday, my parents and brother took me to the Belmont Drive-In to watch Batman Forever and I can remember the night we went it was kind of rainy out but while I was not a fan of the movie it was fun watching the flick in the old family car with everyone. I can remember that they also made snack food for us to munch on. Sadly the old Drive-In went out of business thanks the those wonderful land hogs at Reynolds and Reynolds who bought them out and let the land sit empty for years till they built another soulless building in its spot. I saw Batman & Robin in the theater inside The Dayton Mall with my Brother and younger cousin Nick when our aunt asked us to babysit him and offered to pay for our tickets and snack food, how could you go wrong. After the movie we played on the arcade machines that were in front of the theater. In closing, I miss the Belmont Drive-In and wish it was still around today.

Belmont Drive In

Well my fellow Bat-Fans, we are at the point of looking at the comic adaptations and I for one can’t wait to relive many of them. You see in my youth I had read the comics based on Batman and Batman Returns and want to see if they hold up! And want to thank you for spending this Christmas Eve here at Rotten Ink. So before we Biff and Pow our way into action, I should remind you that I grade these on a standard 1-4 star rating and am looking at how well the comic keeps to the source material, its entertainment value, and its art and story. I want to also thank Mavericks and Lone Star Comics for having these in stock.  So put another log on the fire and get your self another glass of Eggnog we are going to be having a good Bat Time.

Batman 1989 1

Batman  # 1  ***
Released in 1989   Cover Price $2.50   DC Comics   #1 of 1

A family is robbed and left in an ally.  As the crooks make off with the loot, they get a visit from Batman who teaches them that he is the night! Crime Lord Carl Grissom is being targeted by Gotham Police Department but up to this point they have nothing on him as he has a rat in the department who fills him in and helps cover things up. Reporter Alexander Knox along with photographer Vicki Vale are on the case of who and what Batman is, as crime on the streets is lowering as criminals are in fear. Billionaire Bruce Wayne is in fact Batman, but no one besides his butler Alfred knows his secret. Grissom’s girlfriend Alicia is cheating on him with his right hand man Jack Napier who he sets up at a chemical plant that leads to Batman knocking him into a vat of chemicals, and his face is turned white and his hair green and Jack becomes The Joker! Bruce Wayne however finds himself falling in love with Vicki Vale.  As they go on a date The Joker shoots and kills Grissom and now is in charge of his operation. Vicki is following Bruce Wayne and while out The Joker attacks and his men fire guns into crowd.  When the attack is over, they interview Vicki on TV and The Joker likes what he sees. Weird deaths are happening all over Gotham as people are dying of laughter and it’s shown that The Joker is using chemicals in every day products to spread his death. The citizens found out thanks to Batman who saves Vicki Vale from a Joker attacks at a restaurant and gives her the secret.  The next day Bruce Wayne on his date with Vicki is about to tell her that he is Batman when The Joker once more attacks and with this attack Bruce Wayne figures out that Jack Napier (now The Joker) is the thug who shoot and killed his parents! The Joker throws a parade in downtown Gotham and not only giving out free “money” but also poisoning people via balloons. Batman spoils his fun as The Joker takes Vicki prisoner on top of a bell tower.  Batman comes to her aid, and the fight leaves The Joker falling to his death as Batman becomes the savior of Vicki and Gotham.

This is 100% a comic movie adaptation done right, as the look and vibe of the comic captures the magic of the film. The story of this comic is Batman is new to Gotham, and the cops nor the civilians know what to think of him as he takes down crooks with his vigilante justice, and during one of his crime stopping nights he takes a crazy crook and by accident turns him into an even more crazy crook, The Joker, who is tormenting the city! Throw in the fact that Batman is Bruce Wayne, a rich respected man who is torn between doing what he thinks is right and love as he falls for a beautiful photographer who has also captured the eye of the crazed Joker! Batman comes off as a focused hero to the helpless who takes his crime fighting very serious, while Bruce Wayne is an odd rich man who is complex and is torn between fighting and love. Vicki Vale is a likable female lead who has just the right amount of damsel in distress to make you as the reader want to see her get saved. The Joker is crazy and seems like his whole goal in the issue is to cause chaos and to murder the helpless, very great bad guy character and changed just enough from the normal comic series that was also going at the time of this comic adaptation’s release. The Joker’s death is impactful as he falls from high above and dies still with a laugh as a laugh box in his pocket goes off after the impact. The cover is very eye catching, and fans of the movie would for sure nab this one up.  The art inside done by Jerry Ordway is fantastic, and all the characters look like the actors that played them in the movie. I can remember that I read this comic when it first came out as our friend Mike Cessna had it, and I loved it back then, but then again I did have Batman fever! In closing if you like the 1989 film and like comics then check this one out as it was made for you.

Batman 89 Art 1Batman 89 Art 2Batman 89 Art 3

So The Joker is dead, and Batman is now a full savior of the city.  So what baddies awaits him in this second comic movie adaption?  Let’s read on and find out!

Batman Returns 1

Batman Returns  # 1  ***
Released in 1992   Cover Price $3.95   DC Comics   #1 of 1

It’s in the past as a family drops a baby in a basket off the side of the bridge, and as the basket floats down the river and into the sewer, a family of penguins are there to rescue it. Max Shreck is a very powerful businessman in Gotham and is a man with a vision of a more powerful city.  He has the Mayor in his back pocket and he even runs his poor assistant Selina Kyle day and night. While giving a speech about Christmas, Max and company are attacked by a band of scary circus performers know as The Red Triangle Gang.  As Batman comes to save the day, Max himself comes face to face with a strange deformed man called The Penguin who lives in the sewer and knows all Max’s dirty little secrets.  So the two team up to allow Penguin to come above ground and be loved by the people of Gotham. Max has an idea to have a power planet that does not give off energy but takes energy to store, and when Selina gets too close in looking into the plant, she is shoved out a window by Max and is saved by cats who she now has a bond with.  This also makes her an anti hero as she dons a leather cat suit and calls herself Catwoman. Bruce Wayne and Max have a meeting over the power planet but don’t see eye to eye, as Selina shows back up to work to Max’s surprise as he thought she was dead. This bad meeting makes Max turn to Penguin who he now wants to make Mayor, and they hatch a plan of mayhem as they set the Red Triangle Gang free on the city.  As Batman takes out the trash he comes to find that Penguin is not a good role model as Max wants them all to believe and also meets Catwoman who is targeting business owned by Max. Catwoman and Penguin team up to frame Batman and to get the people of Gotham to turn against him by killing The Ice Princess and making it appear as if he did it.  While he is trying to save her ,they will turn the Batmobile into an out of control death machine! With the Ice Princess dead and Batman able to get back control of his car after a nasty joy ride, he is able to use messages he tapped of Penguin to have the people of Gotham turn on him and as he goes back to the sewers he tells his gang the plan of stealing all the first born children of the city and how he wants them all to die in a watery grave! Also by this point Catwoman and Penguin have turned on each other and to make things worse Bruce Wayne has to go to a costume party put on by Max, and that’s when Selina and Bruce find out each others secret identities. Penguin crashes the party and kidnaps Max who he has now turned on, as Bruce turns into Batman and stops the kids from being killed.  With one plan stopped, Penguin now sends his animal penguin brothers above ground complete with bombs and rockets strapped to them to cause death and destruction! Batman stops this attack as well and knocks Penguin out a window and he falls into the sewer bellow. Meanwhile Catwoman kills Max and herself as Batman is powerless to stop her and looses his love.  As Penguin once more appears and is at death’s door complaining of the heat and dies in the sewer water as his animal friends take his body away. Bruce Wayne won’t forget Selina Kyle as Catwoman’s shadow is seen in a ally.

Good comic adaptation follow up to the original but slightly looses the magic of the film, as many plot moments seemed a little rushed. Bruce Wayne/Batman in this comic are almost one and the same as he allows emotions to interfere with his personal life as well as his crime fighting mission. I also am puzzled as too how quickly Vicki Vale is thrown to the side and in a matter of seconds, he is head over heels in love with Selina Kyle who he briefly meets as Bruce during a meeting at Max’s and once for seconds as Batman during the first Red Triangle Gang attack. Bruce is really like a love struck teenager who is longing to be loved and chooses the most complicated women to fall for. Max Shreck is your typical rich big business man who acts as if he cares about the people, when really he cares about his own personal gain. Max is a total scumbag who kills and manipulates whoever he can to become more powerful in Gotham. Penguin is also a very violent and conniving man who kills and takes advantage of whoever can get him ahead in his plan to take over the city. The fact that he runs a gang of circus rejects and has a plan to kill children shows you just how gross of a person he is. Penguin’s death is a little to close too The Jokers with it coming via a fall, but it still works as he makes one last attempt to kill Batman grabs the wrong umbrella, and then falls just short of making it into the cold water before he dies. Penguin is nothing like the comic version and is not classy in any way and is more of a freak, but he still does use umbrellas of all types to fight with. Catwoman/Selina Kyle is an interesting character as she is not good nor bad and while she loves Bruce Wayne, she dislikes Batman and does take the life of his boss Max in the end. This really is a cool adaptation and is a nice follow up to the first with an equally cool cover, but I will say the artwork by Steve Erwin, while good, does lack the charm of making the characters look like the actors of them film, while some do, many don’t. I can remember buying this comic as a kid from The Bookie Parlor and thinking how cool I was cause I had it.  Also while reading this comic, I listened to the score for the film done by Danny Elfman. If you like the film and liked the original film adaptation, this is a good one to have in your collection!

Batman Returns Art 1Batman Returns Art 2Batman Returns Art 3

Penguin is dead and Catwoman is missing, who will be the next to step up and get beat down by Batman? Well let’s see in this next issue based on my least favorite Batman film of all time or should I say forever?

Batman Forever 1

Batman Forever  # 1  ***
Released in 1995   Cover Price $3.95   DC Comics   #1 of 1

Two Face has escape Arkham Asylum and is robbing a bank and has a live hostage, as Batman approaches Commissioner Gordon.  Batman also meets Chase Meridian, a doctor in abnormal psychology.  He goes in to save the day, but while he does save the guard Two Face gets away. Edward Nygma works for Bruce Wayne and is a little crazy.  When Bruce shoots down his idea of a TV that broadcast into your brain he decides to kill the manager and seek revenge on Bruce whom he leaves a riddle for. Bruce takes the riddle to Chase, and after they crack it, they go to a charity circus event and when The Flying Graysons are on, Two Face enters complete with a bomb.  As son Dick Grayson gets the bomb to safety, his parents are murdered by Two Face and Bruce can do nothing to save them. Dick stays at Wayne Manor as once more Two Face tries to kill Batman and fails.  While at his hideout he gets a visit from Nygma who is know calling himself The Riddler, and they two form a team to kill Batman that involves Nygma’s TV Mind Box! Dick sneaks and follows Alfred to the Bat Cave and takes the Batmobile for a drive and saves a woman from some street punks and gets a taste and wants to join Batman as a team who of course rejects the idea. At a party for Nygma’s new invention that is making his company out do Wayne Enterprises two to one, Two Face crashes and Batman this time around is hurt in the fight but is saved by Dick who is wearing his circus outfit and a tiny mask. Alfred tries to push a bruised up Bruce that he should train Dick and allow him to help in crime fighting.  As Bruce thinks it over he becomes Batman and meets Chase at her house as it’s clear she has feelings for Batman as well as Bruce Wayne, but she in the end chooses Wayne! The Riddler finds out thanks to his TV machine that Wayne is Batman, and the evil pair decide to make a statement. Bruce invites her over to tell her he is Batman, and Two Face and The Riddler come in and shoot Wayne, kidnap Chase and blow up the Batcave. After the attack, Batman along with his new sidekick Robin (Dick Grayson) head to Nygma’s factory and battle it out with the baddies. The end fight leaves The Riddler’s brain boiled by his own machine, and Two Face falls to his death into spiked rocks and ocean water. With The Riddler crazy and in Arkham Asylum, Chase knows now she loves the man behind that bat.

I must say I liked this comic adaptation better then the film it’s based on! Gone is the terrible over acting of Tommy Lee Jones as Two Face; missing is Jim Carey’s version of The Riddler just being silly and Ace Ventura like.  Instead we get a fun kid friendly Batman adventures that is laced with some fun silly moments. The story has Bruce Wayne and his alter ego Batman once more falling for a woman who is torn between the two, not knowing till later that they are the same person.  Along the way Batman makes enemies with a crazy inventor and a baddy from his past comes out to play. He also adopts a circus performer who turns into his sidekick in fighting crime. Batman/Bruce Wayne in this issue is on the verge of walking away from crime fighting to settle down with a woman he once more just meet, but by some point comes to learn that both sides of his life are important, and they can come together. Dick Grayson/Robin for the most part takes a back seat and is used just right, not forcing him down your throat and allowing him to become important to the film’s end plot. Chase Meridian is smart and pretty but besides being a love interest does nothing to special to make her on the level of Vicki Vale or Selina Kyle. The Riddler/ Edward Nygma is crazy and wants to really show Bruce Wayne up and is obsessed with power.  His defeat coming by his own invention is well done, as is the fact his head becomes misshapen with the overload. Two Face loves to kill and is a good comic book villain in this comic. The lame thing is once more Two Face, much like The Joker and Penguin before him dies via a fall! The cover on this one is okay and not as eye catching as the other two.  The art done by Michel Dutkiewicz is really great and helps add to the over all appeal of the comic. To sum it up, a solid good adaptation that is better then the movie it’s based on!

Batman Forever Art 1Batman Forever Art 2Batman Forever Art 3

Two Face dead via a fall onto some pointy rocks and The Riddler looks like the Elephent Man and is in the loony bin.  So who’s next on Batman’s list to rid Gotham of?  Let’s read the last to find out!

Batman & Robin 1

Batman & Robin  # 1  **1/2
Released in 1997   Cover Price $3.95   DC Comics   #1 of 1

Batman and Robin try to stop Mr. Freeze from stealing a giant diamond but fall short when Robin is turned into an icicle and Batman must save him from freezing to death as Mr. Freeze escapes. Meanwhile in South America, Dr. Pamela Isley is working on a chemical that will make plants stronger as her partner Dr. Jason Woodrue uses it to make super soldiers and creates Bane, a muscle bound brute who does what he’s told.  When Isley finds out, he attacks her and knocks her into chemicals that turns her into Poison Ivy who kills Woodrue with a kiss, and she and Bane heads to Gothan City. Meanwhile Mr. Freeze is only doing all these bad things so that he can get money for research to cure his sick wife.  While Alfred’s niece Barbra comes to visit and stays at Wayne Manor. Batman uses diamonds from his private collection to lure Mr. Freeze out of hiding but it also draws out Poison Ivy who turns Batman and Robin against each other to get her attention. But the trap works, and they are able to capture Mr. Freeze and send him to Arkham Asylum, but the heat between Batman and Robin grows deeper. Ivy and Bane break Freeze out, and Batman and Robin find them at Freeze’s old hideout and while they fight off Bane they also come face to face with Ivy again who uses her charm to make Robin and Batman fight which leaves Robin knocked out.  She also unplugs Mr. Freeze’s wife and blames it on Batman making him want to kill his enemy. During this time we also find out Alfred is sick with the same disease that was killing Freeze’s wife leaving Bruce, Barbra and Dick helpless to save their friend and loved one. Barbra finds out the secret and becomes Batgirl and teams with Batman and Robin to fight off Ivy, Bane and Mr. Freeze who plans to make the whole world freeze in another ice age. Batgirl takes out Ivy with Robin beating Bane and Batman knocks around Mr. Freeze and tells him that Ivy pulled the plug on his wife but he saved her just in time and talks sense into him and gets him to help cure Alfred’s diseases. In the end, Alfred is okay and Batman & Robin have a new partner in Batgirl as Ivy gets a new cellmate Mr. Freeze!

The first thing that I have to say about this adaptation is that I hate the fact it starts off showing a movie set setting up the first shot…this takes you 100% out of the comic and makes you say who cares it’s all just a movie.  Dumb move by DC for allowing this to be the opening panel of this comic. But take that terrible mistake out of the picture, and this is a fun average adaptation that showcases the silly nature of the film it’s based on. The plot is Alfred is sick and his loved ones want to save him, Batman has an issue trusting that Robin can handle himself, Ivy wants to save Mother Earth and Mr. Freeze wants to save his wife….this comic is all about saving. Batman is a little controlling in this one and seems to almost have a chip on his shoulder, but as Bruce Wayne he is more caring and worried about his sick friend Alfred. Robin is a ball of rage as he feels Batman just won’t let him be the hero he is. Batgirl is a waste in this comic and besides the very end when Barbra becomes Batgirl, she is given very little to do. Alfred is caring and sick so you find yourself hoping and knowing he will get better. Poison Ivy is an extreme environmentalist who puts nature over human lives, and for all accounts is like a pretty ex-girlfriend who is borderline psychotic. Bane is a mindless brute who says nothing at all through at the whole comic.  He is as far from his comic counter part and is nothing more than a glorified henchman. Mr. Freeze retains all his cheesy one liners that all tie in to cold, and is a bad guy that you feel sorry for as he is doing everything bad to try and save his wife, but man when he’s doing bad he goes for broke! Much like the movie that I don’t think is as terrible as people say it is, this is pretty average and cuts out many of the really silly things from the movie like the Bat Credit Card. The cover is average as well and for some reason more reminds me of the kid’s novel version that you would find at a book fair. The art is done by Rodolfo Damaggio and is pretty well done.  In some panels it seems rushed but is not terrible looking even then. Over all if you like the film check it out, otherwise I would avoid this one.

Batman & Robin Art 1

That was a good time for me, and we have read some pretty good comic adaptations that did the films they were based on justice. The art of making movie adaptations seems to be lost as now it’s not so much a comic of the movie as they are mini series that act as lead up to the films. Say what you will about them now, but The Batman films was a series that got the young and young at heart hyped to go to the movies and I for one grew up being a Batman kid thanks to not only the 60’s TV show but also the 89 Burton film.  So with this I should tell you the next update will be my top films of 2014 and I look forward to bringing you that. Well I hope you all have a great Christmas and Santa brings you all what ever you asked for.  Until then spend time with your loved ones, read a comic or two and have a safe holiday.

2014

The 8th Wonder Of Giant Classic Comics King Kong

My mother was 7 or 8 when she attempted to watch the 1933 film King Kong with her mom when it aired on TV.  She watched as a group set out to sea to make a movie and landed on an island, and when King Kong showed up just the sight and sound of the beast scared her enough to make her hide behind her mom’s chair! She would peek around the corner and shiver in fright of the sight of the giant ape. Way before the gross out films of the 60’s made by the likes of Hershel Gordon Lewis became the norm in what’s “scary” about horror films, the likes of a giant ape with a love for blondes paved the way and terrified the young and old. While many not consider it a horror film, I have always viewed it as one as King Kong is a giant ape creature that caused panic not only on his home island but also New York, and he does kill and eat humans so yeah, it spells horror film to me. I saw the film when I was about 7 or 8, the same age she first saw it, and I can remember my Mom telling me about her first viewing and this set the bar very high as I sat down on the couch ready to watch it alongside my parents and my brother on a VHS that we rented from Waynesville’s library. From the moment the film started, I was hooked on every word and when Kong showed up I became a fan, and to me every gorilla toy became King Kong. The watch with my family was a great one and was one of many fun family night of watching a flick on the old VCR while eating popcorn and being entertained. I don’t want to give too much of the plot away of the film as that will happen as we review the Gold Key comic adaptation a little later on so I will give you the cliff notes version. The film is about a filmmaker and some sailors who take a fresh faced new actress to an island were the natives take her to appease King Kong, a giant gorilla who rules the land.  They save her and also take Kong to New York as a stage attraction, and he escapes running wild in the city until he is killed in the end. It’s an amazing classic film with special effects that were way ahead of their time.  If you have not seen this film, do yourself a favor and watch it!

King Kong 1933 1King Kong 1933 PosterKing Kong 1933 2

In the 1980’s Ted Turner owned Turner Classic Movies wanted to do something fresh and new to King Kong so they did the unthinkable…. they colorized it! To be honest it seemed like an odd kick Turner was on, taking old classic black and white films and turning them into color films to air on his classic movie station, and on the top of the list that sparked the most debate was what they did to King Kong. I can remember that my mom and dad were not pleased that they messed with a classic film this way, but being so young I was a little curious to see what the classic Kong would look like in color. I seen the color version after the black and white and still preferred the original to the tampered with version. King Kong was the first movie on VHS that I owned two versions of as I had to own them both, and I would say I watched the black and white more than I did the colorized one that I got dirt cheap brand new at Blockbuster Video.

King Kong 1933 Color 1King Kong 1933 Color VHSKing Kong 1933 Color 2

Now if you look at King Kong as a horror film like I do, then you would have to look at Fay Wray as the original scream queen, and she proves she has a set of lungs as she screams her head off at the first site of Kong. She began her acting career making short films and making westerns for Universal but left once she became a WAMPAS Baby Stars meaning she was listed as an actress to watch. As a teenager Wray was signed to a contract with Paramount Pictures where she made over a dozen films like the failure 1928 silent film The Wedding March.  Wray was able to make the transition from silent to talkie films and left Paramount to make other films for other companies, the most notable being RKO that hired her for her first horror films like Doctor X, The Most Dangerous Game and her most famous film King Kong.  She was proud of her work in Kong and that film saved RKO from going bankrupt! During that time as well she was in a few other horror films like The Vampire Bat and Mystery In The Wax Museum. By the 1940’s, Wray retired briefly from acting but came back to make more films and take TV parts being on such shows as Perry Masson and Alfred Hitchcock Presents. Wray continued to act for many years and even turned down a part in James Cameron’s 1997 smash hit film Titanic. Sadly at the age of 96 Fay Wray passed away of natural causes in 2004 while she slept.  After her passing, the Empire State Building shut off all its lights for 15 minutes to honor her legacy. Wray was a true beauty, a talented actress and could possibly be the first scream queen of cinema.

"King Kong"Fay Wray1933 RKO**I.V.fay wray 2fay wray 3

Because King Kong was such a huge hit at the box office, a sequel was made in 1933, coming out only 9 months after the original. The film follows the film director from the first film who is now in hot water for King Kong running wild in New York and travels to find that the giant ape might have had an offspring.  That film was called Son of Kong! In Japan in 1962, they made a film called King Kong vs. Godzilla where they pit the world’s top giant monsters against each other, and in 1967 they made another King Kong film called King Kong Escapes that has our lovable Kong fighting a robot version of himself called Mecha Kong. Paramount Pictures in 1976 decided to make a remake of King Kong and added in more modern touches to the film and even trades in the Empire State Building for the Twin Towers as well as the stop motion Kong for a stuntman in a suit done by FX God Rick Baker. In 1986 the remake got a forgettable follow up called King Kong Lives that had the giant ape getting a pacemaker put in to replace his damaged heart and finding a mate who has also been brought to the USA. In 2005 a longwinded Peter Jackson remake of King Kong was made and besides more minutes added to the runtime, it was a good but unnecessary film. With all these spin off films, sequels and remakes this just shows you how much impact this film had on classic cinema, and I agree with James Rolfe who said that film students should watch the original in film school right alongside Citizen Kane. While none of them are as good as the original film, they are all still fun watches that help add to the legacy of Kong and prove that this primate of fright, this ape of terror, is truly a legend of cinema.

Son Of Kong PosterKing Kong Escapes PosterKing Kong 1976 PosterKing Kong Lives PosterKing Kong 2005 Poster

In 1966 America and Japanese animation studios teamed up to make The King Kong Show, an animated adventure kid show that had King Kong befriending the Bond Family and stopping the likes of Dr. Who (and no, not the BBC version) from capturing Kong for his own evil gain. This animated cartoon was teamed with another show about a tiny special agent called Tom of T.H.U.M.B. and the show would last till 1969 with a total of 3 seasons and 25 episodes. This cartoon also helped Toho make the film King Kong Escapes and also was to be inspiration to the film that became Godzilla vs. The Sea Monster, which Kong was suppose to star in, not Zilla. The cartoon over the years did not hold up well and was mostly forgotten until it got released on DVD as volumes a few years back. I never remember seeing the show when I was a kid, and I think it would have fit perfect on early morning Saturday’s back in the 80’s and could have also found a place on the USA Cartoon Express. I saw the show when I was older and in my 20’s found it to be pretty cool but only from a retro standpoint.

kIng kong Cartoon 1King Kong Cartoon 2King Kong Cartoon 3

So as we all know Toho studios made two films with King Kong in them in the 1960’s, but did you know that there are also two others made in Japan way before this that are now lost films? The first was a short silent film called “Wasei Kingu Kongu” made in 1933 the same year King Kong was released and was a team up from RKO and Shochiku Studios. Not much is known about the film besides RKO asked them to make it and that instead of a stop motion Kong, it was a man in a suit.  It was directed by Torajiro Saito with Isamu Yamaguchi playing King Kong and all that is left of the film is one single picture that was printed. Next was a 1938 film called “King Kong Appears In Edo” that made by Zensho Cinema with permission from RKO and was directed by Soya Kumagai and had a size changing King Kong attacking Edo (Tokyo) during Medieval times! Fuminori Ohashi who some 16 years later would make the original Godzilla costume made the Kong costume in this film.  Just think about that, King Kong was really Japan’s first giant movie monster and not Godzilla like we all thought! Both films are believed to have been destroyed during the bombings of World War II and neither ever showed outside of Japan making all master prints being only stored there. I learned about these missing films thanks once more to James Rolfe (Angry Video Game Nerd) when he did a top 10 list of lost Horror Films and the Japan Kong films were his # 1, and I agree with him when he said he hopes all the films he picked won’t always be lost films. Below are some pictures of Japan’s King Kongs, the first being Toho’s with the second being the 1933 version and last being the 1938 one.

King Kong JapanKing Kong Missing 1King Kong Missing 2

Tiger Electronics who are best known for making handheld games in the late 80’s and 90’s also made some console games in the age of Atari 2600 under the brand name TigerVision. And would you know it that in 1982 they made a game based on King Kong that was a follow up to their handheld games made about the big ape the year before. The game was a total rip off of Donkey Kong and had you playing as a guy who was trying to get to the top were King Kong was.  The graphics were bad and Kong was a stiff looking pixel mess. I have played the game several times and even own it and I must say that it really is a bad game. Though I do find it funny that Donkey Kong was a clone of King Kong who in turn had a game made about him that was just a bad clone of Donkey Kong. The game on release only sold moderately well and was by no means looked at as a classic.

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Ideal made a board game in 1976 based on the remake movie that had 2-4 players trying to get to the top of the Twin Towers before King Kong so that they can capture him, or you can win the game by saving the woman from his right hand via a special mission. But Kong won’t make your trip easy as he is flipping all around trying to knock your player back to the start. I own this game and played it with the fellow members of The Dayton Board Game Society who are Stephen Alexander II, Josh Weinberg, Jeremy Hoyt and Garrison Kane on one of our past meetings ,and I can remember that while the game was not all that ground breaking we all had fun trying to knock each other off the building using Kong as our puppet and it was a blast seeing just how competitive it got. If you get a chance and like classic board games based on movies then I would say check this one out, play time to complete is about 20 minutes give or take a few. I should also share we played this game on February 6th 2013 in Josh Weinberg’s basement and we also played the LJN A Nightmare on Elm Street video game for the NES and we ate Wing Zone.

Josh Playing King Kong Board GameKing Kong Board GameUs Playing King Kong

King Kong not only has been made into many video games and board games but he has also had pinball machines based around him, many comic books, novels, magazines, t-shirts, toys, Halloween costumes, soundtracks, stickers, dolls, drinking glasses and so much more. If you’re a King Kong fan, then there is something for you out there in the world of merchandise. Some of my favorite King Kong merchandise that I owned was my Imperial King Kong action figure that I use to make fight my Godzilla figure and even Kong was wrapped up in my epic Toy Wars, also would be my Crestwood Monster Series Book based on King Kong that gave the history of the film as well as some sweet photos. I also really liked my adaptation novel by Delos W. Lovelace and can remember reading it before bedtime many nights. It’s odd looking back at my youth now being 35 years old and seeing just how much of an impact King Kong has had on my life.  It’s a neat feeling knowing that a giant ape with a love for blondes truly means something to me. And for those of you who listen to Alpha Rhythms on WYSO (91.3 FM) on Sunday nights, I have played soundtrack pieces from the original score by Max Steiner as well as tracks from King Kong Lives by John Scott.

Movie Maniac King KongImperial King KongBen Copper King KongKing Kong Novel

Before we move onto The Gold Key Comic Review I of course have to talk about a ride I have wanted to go on since I first heard about it; that’s the one and only KongFrontation ride at Universal Studios Orlando that opened on June 7th 1990 and became a major attraction at the park. The ride was based on the 1976 remake as well as a ride Universal Studios had at their Hollywood park called King Kong Encounter that opened in 1986. The 5 minute ride would place you and others inside a tramcar but not before you walked down a mock New York street complete with newscasts playing on TVs to build up that King Kong is roaming the streets.  Once inside the car you are treated to explosions as well as giant animatronic King Kong’s that would roar and knock your little car around given the effect that he was attacking. In the end he would attack while you’re on the bridge but your driver would get you out safe and unharmed. This ride seemed amazing to me and just the thought of being close to a life size version of Kong was enough to make me want to go, but being a kid and having parents that didn’t like to travel out of state put a damper on getting to go. The attraction closed in 2002, and two years later a lame ride based on the terrible Mummy Remake took its place, marking the sad fact that I never got to ride the one roller coaster/attraction that I always wanted to. As far as King Kong Encounter, it had guests on a tramcar as King Kong would knock a helicopter from the sky and would end with you being eye level with the great ape on the Brooklyn Bridge as he tries to break it apart.  Of course you would make it off the bridge and would be safe thanks to your driver. The Kong animatronic was at the time the world’s largest and was so detailed that it’s “breath” smelled of bananas!  This ride as well lasted a total of 5 minutes and was one of the main attractions to the park. Sadly it as well came to an end when in 2008 a massive fire broke out and burnt the attraction up, but in Universal Hollywood they didn’t give up on King Kong and replaced it with an attraction called King Kong 360 3-D. I really would have loved to have ridden these attractions and sadly with both of them gone for good I will never get the chance to do so. But I can watch videos of them on YouTube and hear stories from my friends who did get to experience it…sigh.

King Kong RideSo I think our voyage through the sea of King Kong is over and we looked at the movies, video game, cartoon, missing films, merchandise as well as a theme park attraction but now it’s time for us to take a walk on Skull Island alongside Gold Key comics and see what this 1968 adaptation has to offer to the Kong legacy. I want to think Bell Book And Comic for having this comic in stock, and I would like to remind that I graded on a star scale of 1 to 4 and am looking for how well the comic stays to the source material, it’s entertainment value and it’s art and story. So let’s man up and walk through the giant gates into King Kong’s lsland and hope he doesn’t stomp us into the mud!

King Kong 1

King Kong  # 1    ***1/2
Released in 1968     Cover Price .25    Gold Key   # 1 of 1

Carl Denham is a filmmaker who can’t find a lead actress for his top secret next project.  He even has rented a boat called the “Wonderer” along with all its crew and after an agent tells him that he will not supple him with an actress, the director walks down the streets of New York and finds a pretty thief woman named Ann Darrow who was stealing an apple due to hunger.  Denham buys it for her and hires her to be in his new film. While on board the first mate Jack Driscoll falls in love with Ann, and the two start up a relationship.  They find out that they are to port at an unknown island called Kong Island. But while at the island they find that the natives are worshiping and sacrificing women to an unknown “God” and they have set their sights on Ann who they kidnap off the boat and take to the altar where a giant gorilla named King Kong falls for her and takes her deep into his jungle home! Driscoll and Denham lead some crew members on a rescue mission and while in the jungle they find that Kong is not the only giant monster as dinosaurs and sea serpents all blocking their trail to save Ann from Kong’s grip. Kong finds that he is being followed after he beats up a pair of Triceratops and knocks all the crew members off a log killing them leaving only Driscoll and Denham left.  As Driscoll follows Kong, Denham goes back to the ship for more men and gas bombs. King Kong while trying to grab Driscoll from a cave is attacked by a T-Rex and a major battle breaks out between the giant beasts! As Kong climbs to his cave home he must fight off all types of attackers and during this Driscoll saves Ann, and the two escape via the river below. As they reach the gates Kong is in hot pursuit and it’s here that Denham uses his gas bombs to knock Kong out and then takes him to New York to use the giant ape as a sideshow, but when Kong see’s Ann again he breaks his chains and escapes his cage and takes Ann to the top of the Empire State Building where he is attacked by fighter planes that lead to his death as they use machine guns on him while he is distracted by Ann being saved by Driscoll again and he falls to his death. In the end Ann and Driscoll are safe in each other’s arms, Kong is dead in the middle of the street and Denham learns that it was beauty that killed the beast.

This is another amazingly done comic film adaptation of a classic horror film much like Comic Library International’s Edison’s Frankenstein 1910 that holds just so true enough to the source material but still adds its own flare to spice it up. The plot is your simple Beauty and The Beast and follows a young actress who gains the affection of a tough sailor as well as a giant ape and when the big primate is taken away from his home and placed in the big city, his only comfort when he escapes is his blonde bombshell but even love can’t save him from being slain. Ann Darrow is a sweet woman who turns her misfortune of being poor into fame when she takes the part in a movie that leads her to charming King Kong to be put on display. Even though Ann fears Kong she also still feels some affection for him and wishes him no ill will and even tries to save the beast as the planes shoot him down. King Kong is neither good nor bad and it’s clear he is very territorial of his land and very protective of Ann who he has fallen in love with. I love the fact that he keeps not only the natives in check but also all the other giant beasts that live on the island proving he really is the King. Carl Denham, while a money grubbing rich film making geek, still really shows he cares about his friends as Ann’s safety when being taken is a big priority to him, though he does mistreat King Kong by keeping him in chained up and taking him away from his home to be looked at by New York’s rich snobs and press. Jack Driscoll is your very classic tough guy who only cares about the woman he loves and will risk it all for her. The major changes I noticed between the comic and the film is that in the comic the ship is called The Wonderer, while in the film it’s The Venture; in the comic the island is called Kong Island, while in the film it’s Skull Island. I also noticed in the film Jack is annoyed that Ann is on the ship and it takes awhile before he falls for her, in the comic it happens fast. This was the second time I have read this comic and I found that I enjoy it more and more after each read and find something very magical about the whole reading experience. The copy I have is a classic example of Rotten Ink as the smell of the decomposing ink fills your nose when you flip through the pages, while not a beat up copy, it’s still very yellowed on the pages. The artwork is done by ummm….an unknown artist as no credit is given, but I must say the art is perfect for this comic and while Kong doesn’t capture the full look of his movie appearance it still looks the part enough to draw this comic reader in. The cover as well is very eye catching and I am sure drew kids attention to it by using lots of orange and putting a giant ape crushing planes on the cover. If you like the film or like classic horror comics, than this is for sure one you should check out. I am glad I got it and I am sure a few years from now I will read it again.  Below is a piece of art from the comic just so you can see the style Gold Key went for in this comic.

King Kong Art

Really this is a great comic with great classic artwork and really is going to help us kick off our two month long horror comic countdown to Halloween 2014! So on this update we traveled to Skull Island and got to know King Kong and see what that massive beast was about, but how about next time we travel to a black lagoon and celebrate the 60th birthday of the Universal Monster Gill-Man.  So until then read a comic or two, watch a horror film and support your local Horror Host.

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Enjoy The All You Can Eat Blood Fountain Only At Blood Feast

Welcome back my fellow comic and pulp culture lovers.  Today’s update is going to be a quick one and will focus on a master of splatter film director and comic adaptation of one of his films. A few updates back I spoke about “The Godfather Of Gore” being Lucio Fulci, and some of my friends and readers say that that title really belongs to Pittsburgh born independent filmmaker Herschell Gordon Lewis who used lots of blood and guts in his films over the ages. At the age of 6, Lewis had his father pass away.  A few years later his mom remarried a man, and they all moved to Chicago where he spent most of his youth. Lewis got a masters degree in journalism, became a teacher, ran many radio stations and worked with a friend to make commercials under the company name Lewis And Martin Films. His first venture into film came in 1959 with the film called “The Prime Time” where he acted as the producer.  This film also marked the end of him not directing his own flicks for his company. In the 1960’s Lewis made more adult softcore style films like Living Venus, Bell Bare And Beautiful and Boin-n-g! making him one of the grandfathers of the modern exploitation films. It was in 1963 that he dove head first into blood soaked horror films with the film Blood Feast, and while after this film he made a few more non-horror pictures, none of them have the cult following as films like Two Thousand Maniacs, Color Me Blood Red, A Taste Of Blood, The Gruesome Twosome, The Wizard Of Gore and The Gore Gore Girls to name a few. In 2002 Lewis made a sequel to his first horror film called Blood Feast 2: All You Can Eat and showed that even after all these years he still can pack a gut punch that would turn your stomach.  While over the years Lewis has slowed done on making films, the director, who as of early 2014 is 84 years old, still makes a film from time to time with his latest being Zombificador that is due out soon. I have meet Mr. Lewis at Cinema Wasteland Convention some years back and will say that he was very nice and was swamped with people looking to not only get his autograph but also just to have a few moments to talk film with him. While many of his films are hit and miss with me, I have many friends that truly love Lewis and his work, and one thing is for sure, the man helped make micro/independent movies important for the modern horror viewers like George A. Romero did with Night Of The Living Dead in 1968.

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Considered the first splatter film, 1963’s Blood Feast was a bloodbath that viewers enjoyed and the critics hated. The film is about a food cater who kills woman in order to steal body parts to use in rituals of eating human flesh to please an ancient Egyptian Goddess. The film did pretty well at the box office, bringing in $4 million making it some major profit off the small budget of $24 thousand. The film’s reputation earned it a spot on England’s Video Nasty list, making it the oldest film to make the list.  For those who don’t know what Video Nasty list is, I will explain. In the 1980’s video rental was a major deal all over the world and many horror films were made just for this market let alone.  It was the only way viewers could see many of these films from all over the world. Well in England they didn’t want people to watch many of these films, thinking that the violent acts from the movies were bad for people’s brains and could cause major acts of murder and mayhem across their country. They decided to go in and cut many of the films into poor chop jobs and some films were just banned out right.  These films were dubbed “Video Nasties” and were illegal for people to watch uncut and could even cause a police raid of your house if reported you had copies of some of these films. Films like Blood Feast, Zombi 2, Night Of The Demon, House By The Cemetery, Cannibal Holocaust, Mardi Gras Massacre, Faces Of Death, Texas Chainsaw Massacre and so many more made up the list of films that were cut or just banned. Many films never made it to the Video Nasty List but were also confiscated by the police if found in your home such as Dawn Of The Mummy, Hills Have Eyes, Gates Of Hell, Basket Case, Friday The 13th, Night of The Seagulls and many more. While the list and the punishments for watching/owning these films is still around to this day, it’s enforced a little less and viewers have since been able to watch many of the films uncut without fear of punishment. Wow, I just got way off topic of Blood Feast, but here in the US if you’re looking to watch the film, it can be found on VHS and DVD uncut and uncensored.

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The fans wanted it, so in 2002 Lewis revisited his film Blood Feast and made a part two called Blood Feast 2: All You Can Eat. In this film we follow the grandson of the first film’s butcher as he follows in dear granddad’s footsteps. The film got positive reviews from critics but had trouble finding a distributor causing it to sit a year on the shelf before coming out via Media Blasters. The film is filled with more blood, guts and gore causing fans of the original to enjoy every crimson soaked second of it. Unlike the first film, the sequel never got a major theatrical release and really did find its home on the DVD market. The film also marked the first time in 36 years that Lewis teamed up with his old producer of the first film David F. Friedman, making this sequel as close to the original as possible.  The film also turned up the splatter making it a true follow up that tried to one up the film that came before it.

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So while I will credit Lewis with being a master of Splatter and the Godfather of Splatter films, I would still have to stay with the decision that Fulci is the true Godfather Of Gore! And this does not take away from the fact that Lewis is one of the best America micro budget horror film directors of the 60’s and 70’s and his influences on filmmakers is still seen in many of the films of today. I just find that the effects and gore in Fulci films are better done and have more impact on me as a horror fan and viewer.  Nothing Lewis has done in the gore department has stuck with me like the gut puking and eye ball bleeding scene from Gates of Hell or the splinter in the eye effect of Zombi 2. But I guess the main question is, what director had the better comic adaptation of their film? Was it Fulci with Gates of Hell from Xmachina or Lewis with Blood Feast from Eternity? Well I will soon find out as I am about to tackle Blood Feast…But before I do, I want to remind my readers I grade these issues on a star scale of 1 to 4 and am looking for how well the comic stays to the source material, it’s entertainment value and it’s art and story. I want to thank the team up of Mavericks Cards and Comics and Lone Star comics for having these issues in stock. So with all that, let’s not be late for dinner and find our spot at the table for this Blood Feast.

Blood Feast 1

Blood Feast # 1   **1/2
Released in 1991     Cover Price  $2.50    Eternity Comics    #1 of 2

It’s 1963, and a young woman returns to her home only to be brutally killed and mutilated in her bathtub by a savage killer.  Her leg is taken in the attack, and the police are baffled by who the murder is as he leaves no clues behind. Fuad Ramses owns an exotic Egyptian catering store and is hired to cook an Egyptian feast for a young woman named Suzette, and he is happy to do so as he has a plan that will restrict the goddess Ishtar with the body parts he is taken from the young ladies he is killing.  Yep, he is the killer! Faud is not done with his killing yet as he attacks a couple on the beach and knocks out the guy and butchers the woman stealing her brain and later attacks a woman in her room and cuts out her tongue! The police are at a loss, and Suzette is upset over the murders but is looking forward to her party.  We end the issue with her going to a lecture about Ishtar and the Pharaoh Ramses.

This comic didn’t waste any time and is filled with lots of blood and murder mayhem and 100% captures the spirit and raw terror of the film it’s based on. The plot of this issue builds that the cops are clueless to who is killing young women around town, that Suzette is a smart woman who likes Egyptian history and comes from a well off family and that Fuad Ramses loves an ancient Goddess and is killing woman in a plan to bring her back to life. The plot is pretty simple stuff, right? It’s the fact it is so simple that makes the whole comic work so well it’s clearly not about plot as it’s about shocking murders. Suzette, who is clearly the lead, is not given much of character development and is hardly shown in the issue, but you know that she is going to be a major player in the second issue. The cops are trying to hard to crack the case of who is killing the woman, but are pretty much clueless and useless. Fuad Ramses is one evil man who goes into a craze when he butchers woman and selectively harvests parts of their bodies.  He reminds me for some reason of Jack The Ripper mixed with Norman Bates of Psycho. Over all Ramses is a great movie slasher that transferred to comics really well. The comic is printed on very cheap paper and the issue I have had ink bleed really bad on many pages, but I can’t hold it really against a company that was smaller and competing with Marvel and DC. The cover I have is called “The Graphic Cover Version” and I will say that it’s pretty bad and really cheapens the comic with a terrible shock image that’s a poorly blown up picture still from the movie. The art is great independent 90’s comic stuff and is done by Stan Timmons & Mike Matthew and for a black and white comic, they are really able to make the gore pop out. This first issue is a solid film adaptation and really makes me looking forward to reading the second issue and seeing just how well the comic series will look and translate.  So let’s get to it cause it’s time for that Egyptian Feast!

Blood Feast 2

Blood Feast # 2    **1/2
Released in 1991     Cover Price  $2.50    Eternity Comics    #2 of 2

After the lecture Suzette meets up with Pete Thornton, an officer who is investigating the murders and is clearly a semi-boyfriend to the lovely young lady. While Pete is giving Suzette a ride home, a call goes out that another woman has been found and while she survived the attack, she was at death’s door as one side of her face had been cut off and one eyeball removed. The cops get to the hospital, and they get a few words out of the young woman before she dies. To make things worse Suzette’s friend Trudy Sanders has been kidnapped by Fuad Ramses and is being whipped to death in order to use her blood for the feast that will bring back Ishtar. At his desk Pete takes what little information he got from the faceless woman as well as info from a professor and puts it all together and figures out that Ramses is the killer! The cops rush to Ramses’s shop and find the body of Trudy as well as many other body parts and rush to Suzette’s party. At the party Ramses asks for Suzettes help in the kitchen and just as he is about to kill her and set Ishtar free, Pete and the cops pull in and chase him to the city dump where he is crushed in the back of a garbage truck as he tries to hide. All ends well as the killer is dead and Suzette’s party can continue.

The second issue is pretty fun stuff.  While a little lighter on the blood and gore, the storyline is more in full swing and we get to know Suzette and Pete a heck of allot better. Suzette is pretty likeable and is your average girl next door type who likes to learn and have fun with her family and friends.  It’s easy to see why Ramses targeted her to be the rebirth shell for his Goddess. Pete is a man with a quick mind as he took small clues and busted the case wide open and got the right man on the first try and saved his girl just in time! Fuad Ramses is out for blood again, and in this issue he skins a woman’s face, beats one to death with a whip and tries to use a giant meat cleaver to kill the comic’s lead gal. Ramses’s death is brutal as well, as he is crushed by a garbage compactor and some how it seems very fitting that the scumbag dies that way. This issue also seems to be filled with little touches of black humor that mostly comes from Suzette’s mom. The cover is very much an improvement over issue 1’s, and the art is once more well done by the team-up of Timmons and Matthew who knew how to capture the feeling of the film with ink. Over all this issue was a nice closing to a b-movie comic adaptation. Below is a look at the art style of these comics.

Blood Feast Art 1Blood Feast Art 2Blood Feast Art 3

So we have covered a lot of horror comics in the past couple of months, and I have not done a Fantasy Warfare since The Predator took on The Cougar back in April, and to me it just seems like it’s time to have another battle! Coming out of the Red Corner is that undead priest of fright, Father William Thomas from The Gates Of Hell! And his opponent coming out of the Blue Corner, naked and ready to snap some necks Goddess from Lust For Frankenstein! And lastly their opponent out of the Green Corner is that master of the butchery, the bug eyed master of disaster, Fuad Ramses from Blood Feast! The battlefield will take place in a graveyard off of a wooded path that has not been in use for over 87 years in the small town of Corwin.  So let’s see what happens in this battle of Demon, Madman and Stitched Together Monster, shall we?

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Maria is a 26 years old jogger and fitness fanatic.  Today she has decided to rundown an old path that runs through a part of the woods that is near an old cemetery that is said to be haunted, the local kids call it the mouth of hell but she has ran down this path a few months back and found the sites very pleasing and never seen a living soul let alone a dead one! Fuad Ramses has chosen this path to claim his next young victim but has been let down when he has not seen a person for the 3 hours he has been waiting in the woods near the path with meat cleaver in hand, just as he is about to give up Maria in her yoga pants comes running by and he knows that she has the left butt cheek he needs for his Feast. Ramses starts to follow her and when the moment is right he pounces on Maria who has stopped to tie her shoe, as Ramses is about to hack his victim, an unknown hand smacks him away and the killer goes flying and crashing through the old gate that leads to the cemetery.  As Maria sees who her protector is, she lets out a scream as standing before her is a naked woman with stitches making awkward and weird faces and let’s out the words “your pretty” as she holds out her hand and helps the jogger up. Maria thanks the woman who tells her that she is called Goddess and just at that moment Ramses sneaks up behind Maria and pulls her into the cemetery screaming “That Butt Cheek Is Mine!”  As Maria screams, Goddess moves towards the cemetery to save her new friend and possible lover from the hands of a killer. Inside the cemetery Ramses swings the cleaver and clips Maria in the leg causing her to fall, he raises the cleaver high and is about to place the sharp metal blade into her skull when Goddess grabs the back of his neck causing him to stiff up in pain.  She turns the killer over to look him in the eye before she snaps his neck, and as Ramses pleads for his life Goddess freezes for a moment and has a dead stare.  She looses her grip on Ramses and her eyes start to bleed and she begins to puke up her guts and falls to the ground dead once again. Ramses grabs his meat cleaver and turns to see Father Thomas standing there.  He then sees Maria who has made it out of the cemetery and is down the path.  He makes a run for the gates to exit and get his intended victim but the gates slam shut in his face.  He turns to see Father Thomas right behind him, and Ramses takes a swing with his cleaver. As Maria makes it back to her car, she sits in the driver seat and hears the last cry of life from Ramses, and she now truly knows why that path is compared to hell.

Winner: Father William Thomas

Like Ramses or Goddess stood a chance against the evil Father who can kill with a blink of his eye! So now I am at the point where I have to pick which series was better in comic form.  While I like the art and story of Gates of Hell, I would have to pick Blood Feast as the better comic series, mostly because the full set was released and didn’t leave me hanging on the storyline. But movie-wise I would say Gates of Hell is way better than Blood Feast so I would guess they are tied. I love the fact that Eternity Comics took a chance and made a comic book version of a 1963 film in 1991 and wish they would have done more comic versions of Lewis films. I would have loved to have had comic versions of Wizard of Gore and Two Thousand Maniacs to read and review on this blog. Wow I have written like a machine as of late and need to take some time away to get some work done on Terrifying Tales Of The Macabre.  So for the next update I am going to turn Rotten Ink over to my girl once again as she is going to talk to you all about IDW’s C.S.I comics! So until then, read a comic or five and make sure to watch a local horror film and enjoy nerd life to the fullest.

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